"happy as a...?"

i think we all know the saying "happy as a clam" is kind of gay, can you think of any better ways to finish this cliché?

FLY ON SHIT

None of us have ever heard that phrase ever, bro

Happy as larry

I'm as happy as an irritated hemorrhoid in a pool of acid.

god this topic is brilliant

Happy as a mofo on a milf

I'm as happy as a palsy victim with an ice pick up his ass.

happy as a clark.

As happy as a man who makes a popular thread on watmm

claM

i am happy

Happy as a retard

as happy as someone who's just been released from the gulag, and has also just had a particularly cute bunny rabbit come up to them and sit on their shoulder.

Ready and I'm happy

happy as a beaver

On the radio and good to go

says your receiver

Not to be the baddest

or the oldest nor the wackest

Neither am I needest

or the newest or the blackest

Just a brown fellow

Who's not afraid of Jello

To the people of the world

I would like to say G'day

Had to wait a while

But the while has been waited

Never gave up hope

in myself, nor debated

Didn't shed a tear when I wasn't picked

Cause I got a cone now, want a lick?

Chorus

Third Verse

Now I catch a number

when before I caught a glare

Now I give a pound

when before I got a stare

Now I guess I kinda got it goin on

I get a wake-up call on the lawn

I used to try and push a demo

Now I have a Coupe

That's a bit more than a little

But then not quite a few

Funny how they find you

when they told you get lost

Tell me why you're grittin

when you have no dental floss

Wasn't my loss

Thought you were the boss?

You never knew how much the Sherbert cost

Forget it, I never sweat it

Your girl will give me play I'll wet it

It only happens just because you let it

Now everybody wants to play my phone

I see em with a spoon

I see em with a cone

You never knew I knew it

but I knew you would pursue it

Hurry up and get a scoop before it's gone

happy as a hooker with a premature ejaculator for a client.

happy as a bishop in a boy's school

i was about to post that XXX...

... dog with 2 dicks

...Paedo in a Wendy House

i almost said 'paedo creche manager'

Were going to get along just fine.

  xxx said:

My favorite and definitely local in color is "happy as a pig in shit"

Oh yes. Never heard that one before.

happy as an indian at a lysol factory

happy as lion at an all you can eat mexican buffet

  xxx said:

My favorite and definitely local in color is "happy as a pig in shit"

word up!

As happy as a man who has just discovered he has bacon in his fridge that he has no recollection of buying, yet is still well within the expiry date.