My semen

I've just been sat wanking at the computer in the computer chair, tissue covering penis, but the penis must have been at an angle, as my cum shot out of the end of it I heard a splat as it sailed over the arm of my chair and onto the floor, AND NOW I CANNOT FIND MY FUCKING SEMEN TO MOP UP. My mum will be down here using the computer in the morning, what if it hasn't dried up and she spots it?

Good job!

you'll have to clean the whole floor

Are you implying he'll have to lick it all up, and then brush his teeth so his breath doesn't smell like semen?

  The Pod said:

Are you implying he'll have to lick it all up, and then brush his teeth so his breath doesn't smell like semen?

that was the double entendre

It's really clever!

  The Pod said:

It's really clever!

:kiss:

Get the fuck out of my thread, I need real help, where is Fred?

sorry abusivegeorge, why don't you just mop it clandestinely?

that kid is kinda hung for his age

use a light source and shine it at an angle at the floor and see where it reflects.

  azatoth said:

use a light source and shine it at an angle at the floor and see where it reflects.

this, or a blacklight... not that i know what discovers wayward semen :stuart:

  IRARI said:

  azatoth said:

use a light source and shine it at an angle at the floor and see where it reflects.

 

this, or a blacklight... not that i know what discovers wayward semen :stuart:

black light isnt going to work. i dont know about you but if you shined a black light near my computer the entire area would glow like the toxic avenger

you heard a splat? i find this hard to believe

or was it not carpet

nah, it must be carpet, otherwise you'd be able to find it.. so i don't believe the splat thing

listen to me George, and listen carefully. Check that the coast is clear. Move any furniture that is in the immediate vicinity of the crime. Remove all clothing. Now, what you need to do is lie on your back, stretch your arms above your head and starting by the wall, roll onto your stomach and repeat until you have combed the entire area, much like mowing the lawn. Trust me, when you hit the cumspot you'll feel it on your body. But please be very careful that no-one disturbs you lying completely naked on the floor, as the disease might be worse than the cure should that happen.

  Rambo said:

listen to me George, and listen carefully. Check that the coast is clear. Move any furniture that is in the immediate vicinity of the crime. Remove all clothing. Now, what you need to do is lie on your back, stretch your arms above your head and starting by the wall, roll onto your stomach and repeat until you have combed the entire area, much like mowing the lawn. Trust me, when you hit the cumspot you'll feel it on your body. But please be very careful that no-one disturbs you lying completely naked on the floor, as the disease might be worse than the cure should that happen.

Where does it smell like curry?

edit: That's where it is.

check yer hair

Just let the ants find it.

  my usernames always really suck said:

Just let the ants find it.

  my usernames always really suck said:

Just let the ants find it.

I imagine a Dali painting with ants crawling in semen on a pitted and dirty floor.

  Rambo said:

listen to me George, and listen carefully. Check that the coast is clear. Move any furniture that is in the immediate vicinity of the crime. Remove all clothing. Now, what you need to do is lie on your back, stretch your arms above your head and starting by the wall, roll onto your stomach and repeat until you have combed the entire area, much like mowing the lawn. Trust me, when you hit the cumspot you'll feel it on your body. But please be very careful that no-one disturbs you lying completely naked on the floor, as the disease might be worse than the cure should that happen.

LOL.

I never found it guys so it must have encrusted itself into the floor and is still there now, I tried the light thing and that didn't work either. I guess this is the start of my semen stained adventures.

was it on carpet or not?