collossal dilemma

you really need to shit, and you're going to spew at the same time.

the sink is one metre away from the toilet.

there are no buckets.

what do you do?

garbage can

or bath tub.

  On 7/4/2009 at 9:48 PM, essines said:

garbage can

 

or bath tub.

bath tub is full of parents' expensive posh mats and towels and fancy oils and shampoos

Duh, you shitpuke. Stunt puking between your legs whilst unleashing the torrent from your rear. This technique is only for the experienced puker. Pro skills required yo!

spread your legs and stretch your head as far into your lap as you can get it and let er rip. You may have to hold your penis out of the way with your chin, and you might end up crossing your own streams, but that ok, you're getting laid tonight.

Swallow, or clean the floor later.

I had this experience recently. I expertly coordinated my two ends, and got it all in the toilet. Then I just about passed out.

EDIT: sorry, double post

Get in the bathtub

Or just start shitting and puke on yourself while you're on the toilet, you can take a shower later.

puke upwards real hard let it fall back down in your mouth swallow and done

You come onto watmm and ask us what to do

shower

shitsplash pukeballs, puke a mouthfull at a time with your lips sealed, aim downwards and expell between your legs, if you should follow through, don't worry, you've already made the effort required to aim the mouthful into the bowl, so the rest will followe suit.

I've got it.

Sit down on the toilet backwards, facing the wall. Take the porcelain lid off the top of toilet and puke into the top basin as you shit into the bowl. a few flushes and a little bleach in the top basin afterward should clear things up.

You're welcome.

  On 7/5/2009 at 7:24 AM, jefferoo said:

I've got it.

Sit down on the toilet backwards, facing the wall. Take the porcelain lid off the top of toilet and puke into the top basin as you shit into the bowl. a few flushes and a little bleach in the top basin afterward should clear things up.

 

You're welcome.

That's known in the biz as a "Roman AC Slater"

  On 7/5/2009 at 7:24 AM, jefferoo said:

I've got it.

Sit down on the toilet backwards, facing the wall. Take the porcelain lid off the top of toilet and puke into the top basin as you shit into the bowl. a few flushes and a little bleach in the top basin afterward should clear things up.

 

You're welcome.

jesus christ that's genius

This is a great mental exercise. It's almost some sort of drunk koan.

shitting is a lot more rougher than puking

Better dilemma:

if u were alone o a desert island and you couldn't masturbate would you willingly take your sexual frustrations out on a crab?

couldn't masturbate??

wat!?

a parrot ate your hands

i'd fuck the parrot till it dies

the parrot flew away before you woke up

you better hurry up and make up your mind, the crab is strafing back into the tide

crabs are dangerous, it'll probably cut my dick off so I'll say no

but maybe you could stuff it face-first into a small gap between two large rocks with its butt in the air, helplessly dangling

i'd eat that crab.