Just Folowed Through

Is it possible to catch a stomach bug on an internet messageboard...? A few days ago it was XXX and his nightmare poo episode, then that noob (the one who stands up to wipe his bumhole) with his well intentioned but ultimmately uninspired poo thread and just 5 minutes ago, while enjoying a good old /b/ raid on some camslut website, right after i requested a girl poop in doggy position at cam, i farted out some hot bumgravy into my pants. I was quite relieved when i got to the bog and found it was indeed poo cause it actually felt like i was prolapsing or something. It was probably more like 15 minutes ago now, cause i had to sit on the crapper for a good while squitting out the rest of it before running my arse under the tap. Totally unwarranted. Well maybe not unwarranted, but at least unexpected.

the end

oh, and the gen board was doing so well for awhile. thanks.

lol, /b/

i fuckin HATE that shit. especially when at work.

I shat in my trousers countless times when I had colitis. I once did it while watching Domino at the pictures, and just sat in it til the film finished. Have to say though that Keira Knightley's tits weren't worth it.

/b/raid my hair

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:25 PM, Caretstik said:

I shat in my trousers countless times when I had colitis. I once did it while watching Domino at the pictures, and just sat in it til the film finished. Have to say though that Keira Knightley's tits weren't worth it.

i would rather shit in my trousers than sit through Domino

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:55 PM, LUDD said:

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:25 PM, Caretstik said:

I shat in my trousers countless times when I had colitis. I once did it while watching Domino at the pictures, and just sat in it til the film finished. Have to say though that Keira Knightley's tits weren't worth it.

 

 

i would rather shit in my trousers than sit through Domino

I know which one I found more enjoyable.

I too had awful shits yesterday....still a bit delicate today....WTF is going on?

me too. world bad shit epidemixx

my butthole kinda itches

It happens to all of us... I followed through on Burns Night in a central London restaurant. The worst part was, I was standing at the urinal when it happened. Everyone likes to squeeze a fart out whilst they're pissing, right? Well, just be careful. It did give me and my friends some LOLs and I felt like such a rogue stuffing my shitty pants behind the toilet cistern. It was really messy, moussey shite too.

i've done the old 'stuff shitty pants behind cistern' trick myself.

I'm just glad I was wearing pants in the first place.

cool

Total Muscle Control©

  On 8/14/2009 at 9:05 AM, LUDD said:

Is it possible to catch a stomach bug on an internet messageboard...? A few days ago it was XXX and his nightmare poo episode, then that noob (the one who stands up to wipe his bumhole) with his well intentioned but ultimmately uninspired poo thread and just 5 minutes ago, while enjoying a good old /b/ raid on some camslut website, right after i requested a girl poop in doggy position at cam, i farted out some hot bumgravy into my pants. I was quite relieved when i got to the bog and found it was indeed poo cause it actually felt like i was prolapsing or something. It was probably more like 15 minutes ago now, cause i had to sit on the crapper for a good while squitting out the rest of it before running my arse under the tap. Totally unwarranted. Well maybe not unwarranted, but at least unexpected.

 

the end

  On 8/14/2009 at 9:05 AM, LUDD said:

that noob

 

that's me!

I actually had a bout of explosives on the train this morning. It was terrible.

fin

i once took a shit.

end

I'm shitting as I type this. No lie.

Odd - I, on the other hand, had the most relaxing, cleansing, thorough shit I've had in some time:

I skipped dinner the other night as I wasn't hungry and still feeling full from lunch, and when I got home from work, took a quick little dump - nothing spectacular, just enough to get the feeling of having to poop to subside.

Later, after playing video games with my son, I excused myself, and again, small, non-eventful poop. Again, feeling subsides, return to game playing.

After going to bed, I wake up around 11:00PM and again feel the urge to poop - mind you, this would be my 3rd run in less than 6 hours, quite prolific if you ask me - but this one was what my colon was preparing for with the small salvos previously. I got up, sat down, and unlike cleansing poops I've had in the past where the shit roars from my sphincter like a freight train barreling through the farmlands of America, this was a gradual increase in pressure, but not so much that it felt like I was going to explode and douse the bowl with brown butt batter, but more akin to turning on the faucet all the way to the open position.

The poop seemed to flow endlessly from my anus, as if it was like a sieve pouring grain into a hopper - no breaks, no feelings of individual pieces coming out; just a pure flow of thick, smooth feces. After a good three or four minutes (and no need to apply extra pressure, mind you), I finally felt the end of the flow and heard the quiet splash, breaking the surface of the water.

I got up, turned around to see, and was amazed - there was a comical, almost artificial-looking swirl pile of poop in the bowl, with the notable exception that it didn't really swirl per se, but more collapsed upon itself, almost like when you dispense ice cream from a self-serve machine onto a cone and it squashes itself down under it's own weight. It was literally about 3 handfuls of shit, and would have probably filled a tub of butter to the top.

The feeling afterwards was of being 'empty' - I literally could feel my colon devoid of any buildup, remnants, or extra stool being formed.

I went back to bed and had a great nights' sleep.

  On 8/14/2009 at 2:29 PM, Iain C said:

I felt like such a rogue stuffing my shitty pants behind the toilet cistern

Pricelessly amusing

  On 8/14/2009 at 3:58 PM, Joyrex said:

there was a comical, almost artificial-looking swirl pile of poop in the bowl, with the notable exception that it didn't really swirl per se, but more collapsed upon itself, almost like when you dispense ice cream from a self-serve machine onto a cone and it squashes itself down under it's own weight.

A little something like this, J-Dog?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqNOQspgmIM

  On 8/14/2009 at 3:58 PM, Joyrex said:

It was literally about 3 handfuls of shit, and would have probably filled a tub of butter to the top.

hahalol

  On 8/14/2009 at 4:30 PM, Space Coyote said:

  On 8/14/2009 at 2:29 PM, Iain C said:

I felt like such a rogue stuffing my shitty pants behind the toilet cistern

 

Pricelessly amusing

 

  On 8/14/2009 at 3:58 PM, Joyrex said:

there was a comical, almost artificial-looking swirl pile of poop in the bowl, with the notable exception that it didn't really swirl per se, but more collapsed upon itself, almost like when you dispense ice cream from a self-serve machine onto a cone and it squashes itself down under it's own weight.

 

A little something like this, J-Dog?

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqNOQspgmIM

YEESSSSSSSSS

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:25 PM, Caretstik said:

I shat in my trousers countless times when I had colitis. I once did it while watching Domino at the pictures, and just sat in it til the film finished. Have to say though that Keira Knightley's tits weren't worth it.

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:55 PM, LUDD said:

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:25 PM, Caretstik said:

I shat in my trousers countless times when I had colitis. I once did it while watching Domino at the pictures, and just sat in it til the film finished. Have to say though that Keira Knightley's tits weren't worth it.

 

 

i would rather shit in my trousers than sit through Domino

  On 8/14/2009 at 1:09 PM, Caretstik said:

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:55 PM, LUDD said:

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:25 PM, Caretstik said:

I shat in my trousers countless times when I had colitis. I once did it while watching Domino at the pictures, and just sat in it til the film finished. Have to say though that Keira Knightley's tits weren't worth it.

 

 

i would rather shit in my trousers than sit through Domino

I know which one I found more enjoyable.

LOL

  On 8/14/2009 at 12:25 PM, Caretstik said:

Have to say though that Keira Knightley's tits weren't worth it.

Is that why people saw that movie? Always wondered why.