i live in glasgow now

what should i be checking out?

gedda fuck outta there

where the nearest hospital is

buy a stab vest

heh, i have to do like 90 hours community service up here too.

  On 9/27/2009 at 2:16 AM, messiaen said:

I live in glasgow now

You have about 6 days to live.

No, i jest. You have uprooted. Possibly to escape your criminal past. Glasgow is a fine place, good place to make a new start and put all those convictions behind you.

Only thing is everyone there talks in a stupid voice which rises in tone at the end of every sentence. You'll get used to it. Good bands play there, i often find myself having to commute through just to see decent bands.

Glasgow will be good for you, i just have a feeling about it. Trust me.

are you ok messr clitterhaus? that was a disturbingly positive post from your fine self.

Still pretty drunk from last night, messiaen. I'll be back to normal in no time

stay away from the east end

also stay away from the south side and the north side.

the west end is the only half decent bit

tbh, the best thing about glasgow is the road out.

*throws mug at messiaen*

i agree with gump

all weedgies must die

i was thinking about visiting glasgow (and the scotlands) next year... why is it so bad?

1. Get the fuck out.

2. Stay the fuck out.

3. Enjoy the road out as you leave.

4. The only living you can make in Glasgow is selling hard drugs, I'm not sure if thats the best idea for you.

5. Avoid the women, even if they are hot, they'll have a penis.

6. Avoid the men, even if they are friendly, they haven't got a penis.

7. Listen to and act upon all of the above.

8. Get the fuck out.

  On 9/30/2009 at 12:35 AM, Godwin Austen said:

i was thinking about visiting glasgow (and the scotlands) next year... why is it so bad?

Rape, pillaging and murders.

well, i think your overeacting bastards, im having a right laugh so far, although ive only been here 6 days. i can walk round the town centre bladdered at 4 in the morning with no trouble so far, i went to community service and all the people were really sound although took the piss out of me to the max for being scouse, i went to a fantastic minimal club yesterday and had a great time, theres a student bar where i can buy a pint of strongbow for a pound every day except saturday, and the university course is unbelievably hard work, to be fair. but so far seems a like an absoutely banging place. ive got felix the housecat at the arches in a week and a half, ive met about 20 properly sound people in my halls, and im having a beast of a time compared to living at home near liverpool. im sure il get mugged before my time is up here in four years but as far as im concerned being reasonable with the muggers and giving them all of the money you have on you then your are probably not gonna get stabbed and as long as i dont have any more than 20 quid on me who cares. ive met a few contacts to make 50 or a 100 quid a week dj'ing some nice minimal and im having a great time so fuck watmm.

i come back in a month or two when i realise how rough it is. but so far with the glaswegians being scouse has actually just got me respect.

Lol, I'll cut you a deal and it's this: Glasgow is actually awesome and has a manic as fuck nightlife, the girls are great fun, and you'll probabaly have a wicked time, and I'll make you a bet that you actually don't get mugged.

You're going to want to look for a large gun, preferably fully automatic. Then look for an abandoned building you can convert into your own fortress. Stock up on supplies from the nearest Tesco's or Netto or whatever backwards supermarket is local in Haggisland and barricade yourself in. Set up a machinegun nest on the roof of said fortress and hope for the best.

Glasgow is a dangerous place, full of stabbists. I'd rather you took precautions.

in general mancs, scouses and geordies fit right in no problem here... good working class cities... common ground.

thankfully glasgow has not yet caught the filthy edinburgh yah disease which plagues us here.

the filthy Edinburgh flu, you mean?

Nah, AIDS is too poofy for Glasgow.

To the neysayers, fuck the lot of ye - weegie's a good place to stay as long as you're in the right bit, and more importantly hooked up with the right people. Plenty of good people in Glasgow. Just outnumbered by the wankers, but I ask you, which city in the UK does not have similar problem in that respect?

The thing about Glasgow in my experience is that you spend a lot of time yearning to get further into the underbelly of Glasgow culture and then when you get there, you just find the whole place suffocating and start to loath its very existence and want to escape... only to quickly realise you miss everything that it meant to live the Weegie life, and hankering to get back. Its a no-win situation - can't live with it, can't live without it.

Bit like this wankfest of a forum!

i mean the stuck up toffs that settle for edinburgh uni when they fail to get into oxford or cambridge, guys in their popped collar ralph lauren shirt and chinos or the girls in pashminas, ugg boots and winehouse hair. the scurge of edinburgh... i'm sure dr. clitoris is one of them.

  On 9/30/2009 at 3:20 AM, messiaen said:

well, i think your overeacting bastards, im having a right laugh so far, although ive only been here 6 days. i can walk round the town centre bladdered at 4 in the morning with no trouble so far, i went to community service and all the people were really sound although took the piss out of me to the max for being scouse, i went to a fantastic minimal club yesterday and had a great time, theres a student bar where i can buy a pint of strongbow for a pound every day except saturday, and the university course is unbelievably hard work, to be fair. but so far seems a like an absoutely banging place. ive got felix the housecat at the arches in a week and a half, ive met about 20 properly sound people in my halls, and im having a beast of a time compared to living at home near liverpool. im sure il get mugged before my time is up here in four years but as far as im concerned being reasonable with the muggers and giving them all of the money you have on you then your are probably not gonna get stabbed and as long as i dont have any more than 20 quid on me who cares. ive met a few contacts to make 50 or a 100 quid a week dj'ing some nice minimal and im having a great time so fuck watmm.

 

 

i come back in a month or two when i realise how rough it is. but so far with the glaswegians being scouse has actually just got me respect.

"Fantastic minimal club" what fucking club is this? I live in Glasgow, I'd like to know! and the student bar that has a pint of cider for a pound?!?! again where please...

Other than that, stay the fuck away from everywhere aside from the west end and you'll do just fine.

i typically end up putting on (what i think is) a glaswegian accent when i'm well pissed

this eve, i did my usual, and ended up chatting to a guy who was actually scottish, and he asked me if i was from glasgow

i was epically flattered, must mean i'm actually doing the accent well

fucking yes

funny this should be brought up today, i went to the arches fancy dress in a gay pink afro to see alex under and green velvet, took a blue mickey mouse and had an insanely good night. theres also an afterparty at karbon starting at 9 so im well chuffed.

student bar with cider for a pound, generally you have to float around a variety of places, bamboo on wednsday and tuesday has cans of bulmers for a pound but they wont let you in unless you are with girls, the flying duck is a bit shit but has pints of strongbow for 1.20 monday to thursday.

  On 10/31/2009 at 6:52 AM, messiaen said:

funny this should be brought up today, i went to the arches fancy dress in a gay pink afro to see alex under and green velvet, took a blue mickey mouse and had an insanely good night. theres also an afterparty at karbon starting at 9 so im well chuffed.

 

 

student bar with cider for a pound, generally you have to float around a variety of places, bamboo on wednsday and tuesday has cans of bulmers for a pound but they wont let you in unless you are with girls, the flying duck is a bit shit but has pints of strongbow for 1.20 monday to thursday.

I just got back from the Arches (London) and four drinks cost me £23. Never buying a round again.