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Woman With Monkey Phobia Goes To Monkey Island


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http://uk.news.yahoo.com/5/20100618/twl-monkey-phobia-woman-savaged-by-macaq-3fd0ae9.html

 

  Quote
Many of the primates remained hanging from her limbs as she lay collapsed with blood spurting from a "deep, deep hole" in her arm.

:cisfor:

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I don't know that that is what i would have guessed.

  On 8/19/2011 at 11:51 PM, Luke Fucking Hazard said:

Essines has, and always will remind me of MacReady.

  On 6/18/2010 at 8:05 PM, essines said:

I don't know that that is what i would have guessed.

Ditto, I was thinking something more on the lines of LeChuck kidnapping her...

I haven't eaten a Wagon Wheel since 07/11/07... ilovecubus.co.uk - 25ml of mp3 taken twice daily.

Here's another priceless quote:

 

  Quote
Mrs Darwell added: "I wouldn't have got off that bloody boat if the tour guide would have said at all that there was any danger, any risk, even the slightest risk."[/uote]

 

DURR HURR

 

Oh, fuck it - this calls for the full treatment:

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  Quote
Her phobia had been triggered by her father bringing up a chimpanzee which she described as "positively evil".

 

i want to hear more about this.

  On 3/16/2011 at 8:14 PM, troon said:

fuck off!

Guest hahathhat

my pop did his phd research on vision -- how the brain sees things. cutting up monkeys and installing electrodes, then wiring it up to a vax 11/750 (i played zork on the same system in 1989, as it was collecting monkey brain data). i've heard enough scary monkey stories to last me a lifetime. never going near those batshit bastards.

 

some of the stories were funny. there was this very serious asian professor, never cracked a joke... then he'd finish stitching up a monkey with all sorts of wires coming out of its head and proclaim, "GOOD AS NEW!" all the grad students were never sure if they were supposed to laugh.

So, besides that one chimp her father owned... Are there really that many monkeys in Peterborough to warrent having to overcome her phobia? Don't go to her dads house (if he still has a monkey) and problem solved. And don't go to the zoo.

Guest the anonymous forumite

I've been there, on this island. Boats offload hordes of idiot tourists who spend their time trying to play with monkeys, monkeys who just wanted to be by themselves. An Englishman was trying to approach one but once he saw the monkey showing his teeth and then attacking him like a thunderstruck, the idiot ran for his life into the water and got real scared. My father had warned me beforehand: stay away, these monkeys can bite you to death.

 

  On 6/18/2010 at 8:58 PM, Kcinsu said:

So, besides that one chimp her father owned... Are there really that many monkeys in Peterborough to warrent having to overcome her phobia? Don't go to her dads house (if he still has a monkey) and problem solved. And don't go to the zoo.

 

You know women, they don't use their left hemisphere that much. :whistling:

Soon you'll be wearing my sword like a shish kebab!

...

First you better stop waiving it like a feather-duster.

 

 

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YES! I hate monkeys too, they are totally evil.

 

My great grandma knew this newlywed couple in Cambodia with a pet monkey, I think it was also a macaque. The couple lavished attention onto the monkey, and totally spoiled it with treats and stuff. But the wife soon became pregnant and gave birth to a baby boy. The monkey seemed really resentful of the baby at first but the couple were convinced that it had warmed up to their son after some time. One day they ran out to do some errands, trusting that their monkey would watch over their baby. However, when they returned home, they found their son with his face gnawed off and their monkey leaping around the crib looking pleased with himself.

=[

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