Bored at Work

Goddamn, I'm so bored today.

I've only recently started this job at a major travel-agents, writing the little blurbs about hotels for brochures. I spend most of the day e-mailing representatives in foreign countries and ruining their sunny days by ordering them to fill out forms so I can write bullshit about the hotels near them.

This morning I got in 10 minutes early, and by 9am I'd finished everything that came my way. So for 3+ hours I've been reading old brochures, looking for mistakes and whatever, just to look like I'm busy.

I can't completely arse around on the internet, although I have done a lot today already, because I'm still new and I don't want to look like I'm taking the piss.

I've got Pokemon, Wario-Ware and Mario-Kart on my phone, but I can only really play that whilst I'm having a shit or else I'll look idle.

Any ideas on how to alleviate this boredom? I almost fell asleep on Page 146 of Cuban resorts.

I always end up reading articles on Cracked.com when I'm at work.

in the holiday brochures look for pics of girls posing in bikinis* and wank off under your desk.

* or boys in tight trunks - whichever gives you the best wood.

I'm in pretty much the same boat every day at my work...i have a very light workload that I can get done in about an hour then that's it for the day...

to alleviate the boredom I surf sites that are not completely obviously not work related. we have a number of retail clients so I can get away with looking on some music retail websites (dv247, that sort of thing) without raising too much suspicion... when I've exhausted the net, I take a 20 minute shit and use my iPhone for a bit, then spend 10 minutes getting a cup of tea. occasionally I'll create meaningless spreadsheets. I also enjoy downloading transcripts of things (radio shows, comedy performances etc) loading them into Word and sitting there reading, whilst looking like I'm concentrating really hard on a proposal or something...

  On 7/7/2010 at 2:31 PM, keltoi said:

in the holiday brochures look for pics of girls posing in bikinis* and wank off under your desk.

 

* or boys in tight trunks - whichever gives you the best wood.

  On 7/7/2010 at 2:31 PM, keltoi said:

in the holiday brochures look for pics of girls posing in bikinis* and wank off under your desk.

 

* or boys in tight trunks - whichever gives you the best wood.

I've ogled a fair amount of bikini-clad women already. It's been good, but I make sure to angle the pages away from my colleagues.

I also searched for a person of non-white etnicity for a whole day. I only found one black man, and he was completely pwning all the whites at a game of dunk-ball.

This is a good one to boost your spirits. It's all about fantasy and imagination and can really improve your working day. Imagine you are earning 10 times as much per hour and work out your yearly income at this rate. Write that figure down. Now that you're fabulously wealthy, it's time to hit the web - you are going shopping Gary. When you see something you like, make a note of it and keep track of how much you are spending. This is brilliant, you are concocting an incredible list of items that will make you feel like a king amongst plebs. Go on, have a good snort at your co-workers, the joke is on them my friend. They simply don't have your finances.

Okay, now you have finished your list and you have used up your fantasy funds. Go get some coffee and i'll see you when you get back.

Hello, now is the time for a dose of realism i'm afraid. You have had your fun and now it's time to divide your funds by 10 and remove the items that you simply cannot afford to purchase and get ahold of yourself. This has probably been a hard lesson for you but a worthwhile exercise nonetheless and at least you wasted an hour or so. Cheers.

i was bored so i made a SUCK MY COCK!! thread

Sounds like my work. Ive been here for 2.5 years now and I'm about ready to do the joker's disappearing pen trick to myself.

  On 7/7/2010 at 3:17 PM, keltoi said:

i was bored so i made a SUCK MY COCK!! thread

and joyrex closed it.

  On 7/7/2010 at 3:07 PM, BCM said:

I'm in pretty much the same boat every day at my work...i have a very light workload that I can get done in about an hour then that's it for the day...

 

to alleviate the boredom I surf sites that are not completely obviously not work related. we have a number of retail clients so I can get away with looking on some music retail websites (dv247, that sort of thing) without raising too much suspicion... when I've exhausted the net, I take a 20 minute shit and use my iPhone for a bit, then spend 10 minutes getting a cup of tea. occasionally I'll create meaningless spreadsheets. I also enjoy downloading transcripts of things (radio shows, comedy performances etc) loading them into Word and sitting there reading, whilst looking like I'm concentrating really hard on a proposal or something...

In my first week I streamed a couple of World Cup matches, but quickly realised that my boss would often walk behind my desk, and fuck, that was a bit scary. Nothing was said, but I had to stop.

So last week I took to copy and pasting the live-transcripts of matches into a word document.

I've also taken to surfing in a Microsoft Outlook window so I can switch back to fake work in a click.

  On 7/7/2010 at 2:19 PM, Squee said:

I always end up reading articles on Cracked.com when I'm at work.

Aw, Cracked is blocked here.

I used to visit that site a lot until they had an article about how awesome Idiocracy is.

Worst film ever.

I had my induction at Royal Mail today which entailed 7 odd hours of just sitting in a room and doing wordsearches. Eurgh

http://mathworld.wolfram.com/OrdinaryDifferentialEquation.html

http://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/Calculus/Ordinary_differential_equations

http://mathworld.wolfram.com/PartialDifferentialEquation.html

http://en.wikibooks.org/wiki/Partial_Differential_Equations

when bored @werk i listen to music, write computer softwarez, and post post to riced out yugo.

story of my life

i escalate my "work" activities as the day goes on, to see how far I can take a piss without anyone noticing

jerking off and taking a nap in the back storage closet was probably my peak of work dodging achievement

when i was in a similar situation i would just go into worked stoned off my gills. of course, i didn't really have to interact with anyone most of the time, and when i did, the were just as stoned as i was.

Definitely the wank suggestion.

  On 7/7/2010 at 8:07 PM, kaini said:

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HomePage

oh god this will kill weeks, literally weeks.

  On 7/7/2010 at 8:48 PM, disparaissant said:

  On 7/7/2010 at 8:07 PM, kaini said:

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HomePage

oh god this will kill weeks, literally weeks.

it got me through a very depressing period when i was waiting to be made redundant. tvtropes is an amazing site

Has anyone said sexual fantasizing yet?

Sexual fantasizing.

So does anyone have a job that doesn't entail sitting on your arse in front of a computer all day?

  On 7/7/2010 at 11:08 PM, Caretstik said:

So does anyone have a job that doesn't entail sitting on your arse in front of a computer all day?

many, a while back - cycling four miles to work to stack boxes off the end of a very fast conveyer belt onto pallets in various configurations depending on destination, wrapping em in clingfilm, and sticking em on the back of a truck with a forklift for eight hours (logistics co for european launch of the original playstation)/working in a leather factory - on the 'dry end', which is the much less disgusting part of the process (that was a goodun, but VERY hard work)/playing tetris in the back of huge trucks with many different sizes of package coming down a belt VERY fast (teams of 4 or 5 were needed in the back of the truck) in a huge mail-order plant warehouse - this was the best because every single truckloader/order picker/packer working in the factory bar me and a few others were squatters (although about half were also smackheads). wicked free tekno parties every weekend; when the season finished i had a bit of a thousand-yard stare, lol.

when i honestly weigh things up, i probably found most more rewarding/enjoyable than my last office job, and i got very fit in the process as well. repetitive jobs involving physical effort induce a sort of meditative/hypnotic thing in you after a while, i think.

fuck it, i think i'll open a furniture-moving company