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Ball smashing


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hey all.

I'm sure there is a thread about this somewhere but I don't want to look for it.

Share your stories of your worst ball smashes or the times you have smashed other peoples balls.

I just crossed my legs the wrong way and it reminded me of this time I was on tour with a band and we would SMASH each others balls every chance we got. It wasn't my idea and I certainly didn't start it but I kinda had to go along with it for 3 weeks.

As time went on, we got more and more creative, deceptive and calculating with our ball smashes.

Sometimes I wonder if the whole experience will have left me barren.

I could give examples but you kinda had to be there.

Anyway, share away.

 

*quickly puts on cup*

Edited by jefferoo
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I was standing with my legs spread apart and a friend of mine comes up behind me, gently and slyly raises his foot, and presses the top of his foot against the underside of my scrotum.

 

Just enough to know he was there.

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I was playing on a ladder that led up to a play-set thing and I fell and smashed my testicles on it. Really kind of hurt a lot.

I'M SORRY FOR BEING ME I CAN'T HELP THE WAY I AM

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I sat on my nuts once, that was fucking fantastic.

 

Also, after being a hockey goalie for 7 years, I took my fair share of pucks to the scrotum. Albeit I had a cup on, but sometimes I wished I was wearing iron plating.

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i kicked my friend in the balls, not trying to hurt him, just softly. he collapsed in pain, after a long stint of revenge he finally got me back, now we're square.

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I was leaving my last job and our usual Monday evening 5-a-side footy was my testimonial match, at which probably the least athletic lad of the office nailed me dead center of the nads from about 2 yards and I went down like Hans Moleman. Wish I could've witnessed this happening to someone else.

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when i was younger i had a case of epididymitus (sp?). its when one of your testes gets twisted inside your scrotum. it was the feeling right after you get kicked in the cookies and the pain sets in. that first rush of excruciating ball pain that only a man knows but never went away. searing pain but impossible to explain to your mother. im sure xxx can shed some light on it.

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  On 9/24/2010 at 3:51 AM, Bob Dobalina said:

I went down like Hans Moleman.

 

 

  On 9/24/2010 at 5:04 AM, sup said:

its on of the adtanvages of being a girl

 

lol

After this I listened to geogaddi and I didn't like it, I was quite vomitting at some tracks, I realized they were too crazy for my ears, they took too much acid to play music I stupidly thought (cliché of psyché music) But I knew this album was a kind of big forest where I just wasn't able to go inside.

- lost cloud

 

I was in US tjis summer, and eat in KFC. FUCK That's the worst thing i've ever eaten. The flesh simply doesn't cleave to the bones. Battery ferming. And then, foie gras is banned from NY state, because it's considered as ill-treat. IT'S NOT. KFC is tourist ill-treat. YOU POISONERS! Two hours after being to KFC, i stopped in a amsih little town barf all that KFC shit out. Nice work!

 

So i hope this woman is not like kfc chicken, otherwise she'll be pulled to pieces.

-organized confused project

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Guest AcrossCanyons

i have a small orchard at the bottom of my garden, one day a few years ago me, my brother and an older friend decided to have an apple fight - one throw from the older lad smashed me square in the balls - immediately fell to the floor, never been in so much pain. jeez, just thinking about it makes me quake...

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  On 9/24/2010 at 5:15 AM, AcrossCanyons said:

i have a small orchard at the bottom of my garden, one day a few years ago me, my brother and an older friend decided to have an apple fight - one throw from the older lad smashed me square in the balls - immediately fell to the floor, never been in so much pain. jeez, just thinking about it makes me quake...

 

LOL

 

(hit in the orchard)

Edited by yek
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Guest Calx Sherbet
  On 9/24/2010 at 3:42 AM, xxx said:

I marched snare in high school band. We played with logs for sticks. The upperclassmen thought it was funny to just "tap" another guy's dick tip. Jesus, all you had to do was the lightest of taps with something that dense and you just wanted to die/puke. It quickly went out of style over universal hatred of it.

 

I was sledding with my cousin when I was a kid. He was further ahead. His friend was tailing him and decided to roll off his sled--the classic wood with steel runner design--and the sled kept racing down the hill. My cousin came to a stop, rolled over...just to have the speeding sled run into his junk. His cries were horrific. I heard from his sister that his entire pelvis was black and blue. As if this weren't bad enough, he was born with something called urethral stenosis (narrowing). Physics people may remember that pressure is inversely related to diameter so he was able to damn near piss across a room as a baby. A urologist had to "bore him out" a little.

 

I'm sick just typing in/reading this thread...

 

oh sweet jesus. this is the worst i've ever heard

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Taken plenty of footballs to the balls.

 

That middle bar that connects your handlebars and saddle on your bike is also a danger zone.

 

Sack-tapping is a regular occurrence in school. No so much anymore.

 

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Back in grade 1 or 2 we used to have wrestling matches during recess. On one occassion the kid I was up against kicked me as hard as he could right in the dick. I never wrestled at recess again.

 

I used to play little league baseball, and I guess they figured all little kids are too inept to be trusted as pitchers, so we had a pitching machine. Pretty weird really... Anyway, one day it either went haywire or it was aimed improperly, and instead of pitching the ball over the diamond it pitched it into my dick. I doubled over and cried like I'd never cried before. It's a wonder I've never pissed blood.

 

Another time at baseball I was playing short stop. A runner was nearing second base right as I caught the ball. The second baseman was yelling at me to throw him the ball, so I did. As hard as I could. To his dick. He fell to the ground bawling his eyes out. I felt terrible, but he was probably one of the kids who laughed when the pitching machine played hardball with mine. I like to view it as karmic payback.

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Bach when i was 13, there was this girl in my class that would harass me every fucking day. Once she kicked me really hard in the crotch, but hopefully she only hit my splinch, so i was ok. Turned out she was in love with me.

 

Also i have a cousin who plays basketball. One day he jumps in the air to do a dunk, but he unwillingly hits a guy's in the balls like really really hard. The guy goes to the hospital, turns out my cousin literally exploded one of his balls. Turns out, also, that this testicle was heavily tumored. Apparently my cousin saved this guy's life. :sorcerer:

 

I also experience testicular torsion on a regular basis (my right teste). I do not experience this huge pain people often describe though. I don't know, i just manually untwist it, then everything is fine.

 

When i was in primary school I used to "race" with one of my friend (a tough kid). We'd sit in front of each other, on the floor, and push as hard as we can on the other's crotch, life if it were a gas pedal. Good times.

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Guest AcrossCanyons
  On 9/24/2010 at 1:35 PM, Babar said:

Also i have a cousin who plays basketball. One day he jumps in the air to do a dunk, but he unwillingly hits a guy's in the balls like really really hard. The guy goes to the hospital, turns out my cousin literally exploded one of his balls. Turns out, also, that this testicle was heavily tumored. Apparently my cousin saved this guy's life. :sorcerer:

this is one of the most incredible stories ive ever heard...

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  On 9/24/2010 at 1:51 PM, AcrossCanyons said:
  On 9/24/2010 at 1:35 PM, Babar said:

Also i have a cousin who plays basketball. One day he jumps in the air to do a dunk, but he unwillingly hits a guy's in the balls like really really hard. The guy goes to the hospital, turns out my cousin literally exploded one of his balls. Turns out, also, that this testicle was heavily tumored. Apparently my cousin saved this guy's life. :sorcerer:

this is one of the most incredible stories ive ever heard...

 

yeah this asks for a mspaint.

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  On 9/24/2010 at 5:00 AM, jules said:

when i was younger i had a case of epididymitus (sp?). its when one of your testes gets twisted inside your scrotum. it was the feeling right after you get kicked in the cookies and the pain sets in. that first rush of excruciating ball pain that only a man knows but never went away. searing pain but impossible to explain to your mother. im sure xxx can shed some light on it.

 

Do you mean testicular torsion?

 

 

 

Squishing balls is pretty enjoyable.

Edited by Yegg
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  On 9/24/2010 at 1:35 PM, Babar said:

Bach when i was 13

 

You used to be Bach?

Edited by chassis

 

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  On 9/24/2010 at 1:35 PM, Babar said:

When i was in primary school I used to "race" with one of my friend (a tough kid). We'd sit in front of each other, on the floor, and push as hard as we can on the other's crotch, life if it were a gas pedal. Good times.

 

lol

 

 

i've smacked by nuts on numerous rails while skateboarding.

 

i caught my jewels in my harness many a time while abseiling/climbing/falling.

 

a deer tick once burrowed into my bawbag.

 

a wasp stung me in the plums when i was 5.

 

a 24 stone freak stood on my nads wearing rugby boots while playing rugby.

 

a sadistic girl once bit me in my globes to see what it felt like.

 

punch.gif

jjbms1.jpg

 

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