what's the point?

do you consider your life to be meaningful?

i'm finding it hard to continue living this one i'm in a huge depression and i've got no direction in life. i produce mediocre music, get b's and c's in class, i continue to fuck girls that mean nothing to me. the bitch that i did love just got back with her ex-boyfriend.all the time i devotedd to her is down the drain. i hate where i live, hate the people i see every day, without this girl life is going to be 2x tougher maybe 3x, d'angelo doesn't even help me any more like it used to. i'm alone in college with no one i would call a real friend. in the middle of no where and all i do for fun is cocaine and breaking into buildings

i need help real bad

sorry if this seems like a desperate low-life watmm type thread, i'm on the last string and i'm asking for help, please is there anyone out there??

the real reason i feel so shitty right now is this one chick...about a month ago a girl i was seeing hooked up with my next door neighbor the morning of my friend's funeral...so i tried to get with her roommate i guess as a way to get back at her, but i ended up falling a little in love, then disconnected all my other relationships at school except for this one. i'm going to be spending this next semester alone is what i'm getting at basically and i can't deal with that. i don't know what i'm doing here. i don't know what i'm supposed to do with myself if there's nothing i want to do with myself anymore??

also, soryr for another Ricky drunk threadc

Stop comparing yourself to anyone else and all your problems shall be solved.

you could compare yourself to me. don't worry, your life wails in comparison to mine. stop lamenting your past and live your future. gotta grow up and shave your balls.

etc.

hail satan.

DUDE LOL! I"m in the exact same shit as you, minus the coke part. Heck you even have it better than me, you can at least fuck girls. I can't even find one who is interested in me let alone fuck one.

I make less than "mediocre" music.

I'm in college make B's and C's in classes that are easy as shit.

I have no direction in life.

All my friends no longer live in this city and I'm forced to talk to people that are sorry excuses for friends and meet people everyday that piss me off.

I feel like i'm going to a school full of retards and I'm one of em.

I have no girl and can't seem to find a decent one to talk to. It seems I only talk to fat chicks (No offense to any here).

So you feel shity? Shit I should have killed myself a while back. The only thing keeping me alive is the fact that I'm 19 (practically 20). I've got some time left before I can say "well i'm really fucked now" regarding the whole girl and life issue. And what is that age? Well I can't say but I know it ain't 20.

As for your girl issue. Screw her man. Plenty of fish in the sea. Some chicks are really fucked up and those are the ones you want to stay away from (THEY WILL DESTROY YOU, I've seen it happen many times), those and the ones who just don't care about you.

  On 11/18/2010 at 7:21 AM, Ricky Downtown said:

do you consider your life to be meaningful?

i'm finding it hard to continue living this one i'm in a huge depression and i've got no direction in life. i produce mediocre music, get b's and c's in class, i continue to fuck girls that mean nothing to me. the bitch that i did love just got back with her ex-boyfriend.all the time i devotedd to her is down the drain. i hate where i live, hate the people i see every day, without this girl life is going to be 2x tougher maybe 3x, d'angelo doesn't even help me any more like it used to. i'm alone in college with no one i would call a real friend. in the middle of no where and all i do for fun is cocaine and breaking into buildings

 

i need help real bad

 

sorry if this seems like a desperate low-life watmm type thread, i'm on the last string and i'm asking for help, please is there anyone out there??

Move the fuck out of Vermont.

  On 11/18/2010 at 8:32 AM, ZiggomaticV17 said:

DUDE LOL! I"m in the exact same shit as you, minus the coke part. Heck you even have it better than me, you can at least fuck girls. I can't even find one who is interested in me let alone fuck one.

 

I make less than "mediocre" music.

 

I'm in college make B's and C's in classes that are easy as shit.

 

I have no direction in life.

 

All my friends no longer live in this city and I'm forced to talk to people that are sorry excuses for friends and meet people everyday that piss me off.

 

I feel like i'm going to a school full of retards and I'm one of em.

 

I have no girl and can't seem to find a decent one to talk to. It seems I only talk to fat chicks (No offense to any here).

 

So you feel shity? Shit I should have killed myself a while back. The only thing keeping me alive is the fact that I'm 19 (practically 20). I've got some time left before I can say "well i'm really fucked now" regarding the whole girl and life issue. And what is that age? Well I can't say but I know it ain't 20.

 

 

As for your girl issue. Screw her man. Plenty of fish in the sea. Some chicks are really fucked up and those are the ones you want to stay away from (THEY WILL DESTROY YOU, I've seen it happen many times), those and the ones who just don't care about you.

You're 19.

  On 11/18/2010 at 8:40 AM, Braintree said:

 

You're 19.

Yes I am.

Hm... leave college, move to a new city, drop coke for ecstasy? I find ecstasy motivates me to do positive things with my life for a little while after doing it. Then again, if you've got bad depression problems it might not be a good idea. The coke certainly can't be helping.

Sorry, my advice giving skills are kind of shite with people I only vaguely know from internet forums... I hope things start looking up for you soon.

the fact that you guys are so young makes your issues seem much more significant than they really are to yourself. wondering wtf about life in college is normal. getting all worried about a girl is normal but there are so many women, you cant spiral down because of one. its hard to do but easy to say. you just have to know that things are not as bad as they seem right now. you have to trust that.

  On 11/18/2010 at 8:46 AM, ZiggomaticV17 said:

  On 11/18/2010 at 8:40 AM, Braintree said:

 

You're 19.

 

Yes I am.

his point is so very solid. take your pole out and stroke it.

maybe go for a walk, eat a pudding cup, j/o more or less. maybe smoke more or less weed. or just fuck it. i could quote gandhi and shit but seriously fuck it.

i think i read an interview where robert fripp said some shit like this

one's perceptions determine the quality of one's judgment

one's judgment determines the manner in which one interacts with the world

and how one interacts with the world changes the world.

so therefore, one's perceptions change the world.

or some shit like that, so cheer up and the world don't seem so shitty.

easier said than done. i know that for sure. coke is fine, just stay away from the smack. i know that for sure too.

check out the blind melon song ''life ain't so shitty'' always cheers me up

  On 11/18/2010 at 7:21 AM, Ricky Downtown said:

cocaine and breaking into buildings

sounds like you know how to enjoy yourself.

Im 28 and your life is more exciting than mine.

Quit complaining!

You'll be fine.

And remember, you are living the best years of your life, so make the most out of it, because afterwards, everything is gonna get shittier.

you need some porpoise in your life.

  On 11/18/2010 at 4:07 PM, keltoi said:

you need some porpoise in your life.

 

HA!!

thanks keltoi

and for all the responses thanks a bunch, i was in a state last night but the sun rose this morning, i got this one

  On 11/18/2010 at 4:20 PM, xxx said:

I've been worried about you Ricky. While it was funny when you WATMMed on a coke/booze binge, I could sense disorganization and that's no fun. I had almost the exact problems near the latter part of college (21-22). I couldn't get a girl to mean anything to me, my grades slipped like a motherfucker, I partied almost every night--which only makes it worse obviously. If I could advise me from my standpoint now, I'd say this:

 

1. Quit forcing the college issue. You might come from the same background as me, which was COLLEGE IS LYFE YOU HAVE NO CHOICE! GET INTO A GOOD SCHOOL OR SORT GLASS WITH THE DISABLED! I found out after my B.A. while taking random post-bacc stuff that community/technical colleges are so much more advanced and enjoyable than I imagined. You meet loads of different people from completely different backgrounds--it's unlike anything traditional university can offer. It's dead fucking cheap--my local is like $50 a credit hour it's the first time I actually paid for school out of pocket with no problem. Plus, you get a limitless supply of hot chicks straight out of high school who don't know what to do in life but know they have to do some kind of school so pick from that cherry tree as needed.----->

 

2. Doing well in university is at the top of the pyramid of needs. If you can't sort the lower levels like finding yourself, trying to establish confidence, keeping blow in its place etc., you can never expect to give the higher-order shit the attention it requires. Put school on "life support" measures by signing up for 6 or more hours (to dodge loan repayment periods ) at your local community college. Pick some shit that you are confident will transfer to other universities for when you are really ready to wrap up your Bachelor's. Take some shit you might never had before.

 

3. Get a fuck-all kind of job like jockeying a grill at Applebee's or something. Working in food service was the most fun I've ever had on a job because everyone in food plays by a different set of rules. Food service will definitely not help you control your drink and your sniff so balance that out for yourself.

 

The flipside to getting a Bukowski-style factotum job is that it may spur you on and inspire you to dig back into college and raise your post in life because you see plenty of "terminals" and it will make you panic if you envision yourself there at 40, 50, etc.

 

4. Convince yourself that changing course in your 20's is not the doom you might think it is. That's what 18-30 is for: sorting shit. Do it at a different pace. When you interview for jobs or school in the future, you can play up the fact that you didn't "go with the flow" like the billion other cunts they just interviewed and "finding yourself" winds up being an edge--not just an excuse used by stinking trust fund hipsters.

 

If you try to force the issue, you'll wind up like me with not much to show for because I didn't go hard enough in school to take me to the next step to complete the thought (medical/graduate/professional school). Today, a half-ass Bachelor's isn't worth any more than the parchment it's printed on so keep that in mind.

 

With all that said, you could be like 45 and then this post would look silly because you would be able to say "shit, 31--like he knows what the fuck he's on about".

oo i didn't see this one, it means a lot that you took the time to give me (and type out) all this advice and i appreciate your concern, know that i'm not a complete fuck up and schools absolutely my top priority. I'm expecting to do better than i expect grade-wise this semester, if that makes any sense. i know drugs are stupid just right now i need them to fight boredom, loneliness, depression, etc. I don't have a blow problem, maybe a cigarette problem but nothing to worry about. just a college kid.

and yeah i'll be moving the fuck out of here first chance i get

killing spree?

smoke a junt

  On 11/18/2010 at 7:08 PM, Ricky Downtown said:

I'm expecting to do better than i expect grade-wise this semester, if that makes any sense.

fucking great sentence

  On 11/18/2010 at 7:44 PM, Rambo said:

  On 11/18/2010 at 7:08 PM, Ricky Downtown said:

I'm expecting to do better than i expect grade-wise this semester, if that makes any sense.

 

fucking great sentence

lol thanks ramalambo