my bowel is a-gurglin

the buffalo chicken sub from ma magoo's was great, but my bowels aren't entirely in agreement. what's the best way to mic up a bowel?

edit -- my bowel wanted me to post this: "urrrrrp, blapp, blurrrrrrplapplapplap"

best way to mic up a bowel? ask Venetian Snares.

Best way to mix up a bowl? ask beardyman

i've seen this video, but did not know it was beardyman!!

you know how native instruments and tim exile made THE MOUTH? i am thinking about a VST plugin called THE BUTT that synthesizes fart noises. presets would include "deep colon", "popcorn", and "ella fitzgerald".

Just use an SM-57 to mic your gut rot like everyone else, jesus.

but maybe this is a job for a contact mic

Nah, you want to hear a bit of the room, too. 2 inches, offset about 30 degrees from your bellybutton or anus.

I mean, unless you have girly quiet gut rot.

iphone mic works perfectly as a contact mic. I've recorded stomach rumbling sounds with it before and it sounds awesome.

So that stuff's not supposed to be audible from across the room?

i need a deeper picture

I has the constipashun.

it's not buffalo chicken without