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I was a Warrior Poet in the Kitchen Last Night


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Last night for sunday dinner I made shrimp in grits with a poblano-cilantro-bacon sauce. Below are some pictures of how the meal unfolded. My goal is to make someone on this board hungry.

 

 

Chop up a shallot and some garlic

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Cook some bacon and pour some wine

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If a baby inhabits the house, position baby in bacon-smell-receving area

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Cook up the shallot and garlic in the bacon fat while the bacon crisps off-heat

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Eat the bacon

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Use whatever herbs you have and a lime for the poblano-cilantro-bacon sauce. Pictured: Cilantro, chives, sunflower sprouts

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Torch some poblanos until charred on all sides

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Steam poblanos in a paper bag, then remove skin

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Splay the poblanos like a prize animal pelt. then dice

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Blend poblanos with the cooked shallot and garlic, the herbs, lime, some olive oil and salt and pepper.

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Peel and devein your shrimp

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Impromptu diced avocado with lime and salt. eat it

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Boil the stock and stir in the cornmeal

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Get some spices like old bay, cumin, and chili powder on the shrimp

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Cook up the shrimp

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Put a bit of the sauce in the bowl, then spoon in some grits, then top with shrimp. garnish with a few sprouts. EAT!

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i live with a professional chef now, hes quite often bee in work all day and cant be arsed cooking but hes been teaching me, last night was homemade garlic chicken kievs with a buttery courgette mash potato and runner beans, it was fantastic. the next year is gonna see me learn some warrior poetry of my own i hope.

Guest Coalbucket PI

I live with a pro chef too, he used to just be a gifted amateur and cooked up amazing stuff but now he's doing it as a job its just not happening, I am now the valiant kitchen knight of our house.

 

I freestyled some chilli ginger and garlic sweet potato mash the other day which made my girlfriend convulse with joy, although I followed it the next day with an impromptu mozzarella ricotta tomato shallot and paprika pasta sauce which resulted in her vomiting a few hours later and me engaging in five toilet sessions during which no solid matter was passed. Oh well.

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:24 PM, Coalbucket PI said:

I live with a pro chef too, he used to just be a gifted amateur and cooked up amazing stuff but now he's doing it as a job its just not happening, I am now the valiant kitchen knight of our house.

 

I freestyled some chilli ginger and garlic sweet potato mash the other day which made my girlfriend convulse with joy, although I followed it the next day with an impromptu mozzarella ricotta tomato shallot and paprika pasta sauce which resulted in her vomiting a few hours later and me engaging in five toilet sessions during which no solid matter was passed. Oh well.

 

 

being able to make your girlfriend both convulse with joy and also shit dishwater for 5 days straight is no mean feat my friend.

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:11 PM, keltoi said:

fred, your hands gave me a boner.

 

those are my wife's hands with the shrimp. now we must duel.

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:16 PM, jules said:

how did the cilantro-poblano sauce turn out? i was playing with a poblano pesto last summer that i thought was really good.

 

it was really good, but it could be better. needs more heat. i'd throw a jalapeno in next time maybe. maybe some cheese of some sort. i dont know, it could use something else and i cant put my finger on it. the bacon might have actually been good in it. it seemed like it could use some savoriness.

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:45 PM, Benedict Cumberbatch said:

you guys like fridge magnets huh

 

yes indeed. we get one every time we visit a new city.

 

p.s. thanks for answering my random question earlier, i have a reply drafted but needs to be edited and finalized before sending your way

 

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:08 PM, patternoverlap said:

Loveliness. What kind of bacon do you buy?

 

thick cut, whatever's on sale usually. bacons packs are like blowjobs. even the worst is awesome.

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:15 PM, messiaen said:

i live with a professional chef now, hes quite often bee in work all day and cant be arsed cooking but hes been teaching me, last night was homemade garlic chicken kievs with a buttery courgette mash potato and runner beans, it was fantastic. the next year is gonna see me learn some warrior poetry of my own i hope.

 

 

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:24 PM, Coalbucket PI said:

I live with a pro chef too, he used to just be a gifted amateur and cooked up amazing stuff but now he's doing it as a job its just not happening, I am now the valiant kitchen knight of our house.I freestyled some chilli ginger and garlic sweet potato mash the other day which made my girlfriend convulse with joy, although I followed it the next day with an impromptu mozzarella ricotta tomato shallot and paprika pasta sauce which resulted in her vomiting a few hours later and me engaging in five toilet sessions during which no solid matter was passed. Oh well.

 

these both sound delicious. but where are the pics? good food needs pics.

 

also, what's it like living with chefs? what are their demeanors like? are they tired all the time? angry? drink/drugs a lot? odd hours?

Guest Benedict Cumberbatch
  On 8/8/2011 at 6:49 PM, Fred McGriff said:
  On 8/8/2011 at 6:45 PM, Benedict Cumberbatch said:

you guys like fridge magnets huh

 

yes indeed. we get one every time we visit a new city.

 

p.s. thanks for answering my random question earlier, i have a reply drafted but needs to be edited and finalized before sending your way

 

 

don't overthink it bro

 

 

our fridge is just covered in a million photos of us. is that weird?

Edited by Benedict Cumberbatch
  On 8/8/2011 at 6:52 PM, Benedict Cumberbatch said:
  On 8/8/2011 at 6:49 PM, Fred McGriff said:
  On 8/8/2011 at 6:45 PM, Benedict Cumberbatch said:

you guys like fridge magnets huh

 

yes indeed. we get one every time we visit a new city.

 

p.s. thanks for answering my random question earlier, i have a reply drafted but needs to be edited and finalized before sending your way

 

 

don't overthink it bro

 

 

our fridge is just covered in a million photos of us. is that weird?

 

oh it's not me, my manager is reviewing it. i'll send you the reply once i get approval.

 

yeah that's only slightly weirder than magnets i reckon. i have a friend that puts children's drawing on his fridge. he doesnt have any kids though.

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:52 PM, Fred McGriff said:
  On 8/8/2011 at 6:15 PM, messiaen said:

i live with a professional chef now, hes quite often bee in work all day and cant be arsed cooking but hes been teaching me, last night was homemade garlic chicken kievs with a buttery courgette mash potato and runner beans, it was fantastic. the next year is gonna see me learn some warrior poetry of my own i hope.

 

 

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:24 PM, Coalbucket PI said:

I live with a pro chef too, he used to just be a gifted amateur and cooked up amazing stuff but now he's doing it as a job its just not happening, I am now the valiant kitchen knight of our house.I freestyled some chilli ginger and garlic sweet potato mash the other day which made my girlfriend convulse with joy, although I followed it the next day with an impromptu mozzarella ricotta tomato shallot and paprika pasta sauce which resulted in her vomiting a few hours later and me engaging in five toilet sessions during which no solid matter was passed. Oh well.

 

these both sound delicious. but where are the pics? good food needs pics.

 

also, what's it like living with chefs? what are their demeanors like? are they tired all the time? angry? drink/drugs a lot? odd hours?

 

most of my friend take drink/drugs alot, his demeanor is pretty laid back, smokes lots of pot, but he pretty much lives on takeaway food and cakes/sweets because cooking impressive meals for rich cunts 10 hours a day 5 days a week means that he pretty much actively despises cooking.

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:52 PM, Fred McGriff said:

 

 

also, what's it like living with chefs? what are their demeanors like? are they tired all the time? angry? drink/drugs a lot? odd hours?

 

I live with a chef too! Generally good to live with, though they are a strange and slightly volatile breed. It's normally all good, the only shit bit is he works very unsocial hours, so I can't twist his arm to come to the pub/out & about as much as I'd like, as he works every weekend. Occasionally amazing meals are made, but it's a bit of a busman's holiday to get snazzy in the kitchen at home, there's a fair amount of takeaway or eating at work for him - not as many home cooking fiestas as you'd think. The chefs I know aren't too mad on drinks/drugs, but it does exist. Heard some good tales, like the chef who was caught cracking one off in an office and lost his job - only to get it back when they were desperate a few months later! Lots of chefs cheating on their wifes with waitresses, doing tons of coke at work, etc etc

  On 8/8/2011 at 6:42 PM, Fred McGriff said:
  On 8/8/2011 at 6:11 PM, keltoi said:

fred, your hands gave me a boner.

 

those are my wife's hands.

 

*boner subsides*

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Fred sez:

  Quote
Steam poblanos in a paper bag, then remove skin

 

Result: baph does not know how to steam poblanos in a paper bag, ends up with paper bag over head, kitchen on fire.

Edited by baph
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