catholic wedding

one of my best friends is getting married. I'm pretty sure he's not religious but his wife-to-be is a pretty serious catholic who like teaches at a catholic school and goes to church on a regular basis. So I had to do a similar catholic wedding last summer with another one of my good friends and I happened to be sitting beside the couple that are getting married this year and I was not really behaving myself because I have zero patience for ignorant things like religious rituals or religion in general... It actually angers me so much that my heart rate in noticeable. why the fuck are we wasting our time with fairy tales in this day and age? Anyway I got so angry when the preacher dude started like saying some phrase like "praise jesus" and then the crowd started saying it back... so I left and didnt go back and now the guy who's getting married this year is really concerned b/c he wants me in his wedding party---meaning I would have to be in the front row of the church and then standing up at the front for parts of the ceremony. It's causing a bit of a stir in our group of friends b/c people are worried I'm going to ruin the ceremony.

I'm obviously not going to be a douche and fuck up a wedding but I'm going to have to do some serious deep breathing exercises over the next couple of months to keep myself in check.

Don't go.

  On 3/22/2012 at 4:20 PM, HoA said:

Don't go.

burn it down.

burn it down

burn it down.

Franklin, I was brought up and confirmed catholic but have long since parted ways. Mrs. Dob and I had a catholic wedding though, and now the time is nigh to have our infant daughter baptized. The only reason we did / will do these things is to humor our parents, particularly hers as they had a priest in the family (since deceased). If he's your friend, I'd say bite your tongue, humor him, and try to think about baseball or sex throughout the entire service, maybe ogle a bridesmaid or two.

It's funny talking to my parents (who are way more open-minded) about catholicism, basically they're as disillusioned about the church as we are, but like that scene where darth vader is bringing luke to the emperor, it's too late for them. What with their irish/italian/french canadian parents, catholic school upbringings, etc.

I would probably sit through it. but I've never been to any church ceremony so I don't know how bad it would be...

I've never met someone with ZERO patience. You must be able to just sit there and bide your time. It's only one morning. Then get hammered at the reception and have a fight with a small person.

yeah doesn't sound like too much to ask.

not sounding like the most open minded of people franklin.

I was the best man in a catholic wedding and I was supposed to do some ritualized things that only people who have already communed with jebus are supposed to do, and I told the priest and he just kind of pretended and I didn't put any saintly cracker bits in me mouf

  On 3/22/2012 at 5:17 PM, Bob Dobalina said:

Franklin, I was brought up and confirmed catholic but have long since parted ways. Mrs. Dob and I had a catholic wedding though, and now the time is nigh to have our infant daughter baptized. The only reason we did / will do these things is to humor our parents, particularly hers as they had a priest in the family (since deceased). If he's your friend, I'd say bite your tongue, humor him, and try to think about baseball or sex throughout the entire service, maybe ogle a bridesmaid or two.

 

It's funny talking to my parents (who are way more open-minded) about catholicism, basically they're as disillusioned about the church as we are, but like that scene where darth vader is bringing luke to the emperor, it's too late for them. What with their irish/italian/french canadian parents, catholic school upbringings, etc.

Truth bullets.

Just put yourself in your friend's shoes. It's important for him to be surrounded by his close buds at a very intimate moment.

I got married about a year and a half ago (in a very non-religious ceremony) and if any of my groomsmen would have declined, it would have really hurt my feelings. All he's doing is showing you that you are important to him. You should feel honored. Just sayin.

ah man now that I think about it I have attended once!

my sister got married to a finnish dude years ago, he has this weird catholic religious offshoot. something Russian maybe, I can't remember exactly.. we had a true viking warrior priest with really long hair and a uber metal beard, no kidding.. the whole ceremony was pretty awkward for me and heavy looking faces, but it was ok. as part of the ceremony me and my brother had to take turns holding a huge golden crown just above her head for about 5 minutes during all the ritual stuff... heavy shit. it was over pretty quickly though. half hour tops?

franklin you'd be wonderful at an indian wedding

If you REALLY are this bothered about it, then you're pretty much as bad as the Christians who hate gay people for no good reason other than the Bible says to. Let's try an experiment:

  On 3/22/2012 at 4:17 PM, Franklin said:

one of my best friends is getting married to a dude. So I had to do a similar gay wedding last summer with another one of my good friends and I happened to be sitting beside the couple that are getting married this year and I was not really behaving myself because I have zero patience for ignorant things like fag marriages or gays in general... It actually angers me so much that my heart rate in noticeable. why the fuck are we wasting our time with this fairy bullshit in this day and age?

 

I'm obviously not going to be a douche and fuck up a wedding but I'm going to have to do some serious deep breathing exercises over the next couple of months to keep myself in check.

I didn't have to change much.

I just bite my tongue and attend these types of things while wearing my bathory shirt as my undershirt under the dress shirt. You can attend but not participate in their rituals. If anybody questions your disassociation just tell em afterwards politely. Set a good example of how to be tolerate of others peoples beliefs. Fuck knows lots of those people need such an example.

  On 3/22/2012 at 6:29 PM, missingsense said:

ah man now that I think about it I have attended once!

 

my sister got married to a finnish dude years ago, he has this weird catholic religious offshoot. something Russian maybe, I can't remember exactly.. we had a true viking warrior priest with really long hair and a uber metal beard, no kidding.. the whole ceremony was pretty awkward for me and heavy looking faces, but it was ok. as part of the ceremony me and my brother had to take turns holding a huge golden crown just above her head for about 5 minutes during all the ritual stuff... heavy shit. it was over pretty quickly though. half hour tops?

Oh shit, Springymajig. Those truth bullets hurt, and they weren't even aimed at me.

A+

What happens if you change it to Scientologist wedding though?

Why would someone be friends with a Scientologist, Fred?

In all seriousness, I'd still apply what Jeferoo said to even a Scientologist wedding.

It's not like they are trying to convert you or anything so don't take it personally... treat it as if your girlfriend/boyfriend is taking you to a chick-flick and let is pass through you with little to no substance absorbtion like a meal from Arby's. Get drunk at the reception and it'll all be over.

I had to deal with the same as I was the best man for two catholic webbings... my friends and I respect each other enough to not preach/convert one another to our religious ideals.

  On 3/22/2012 at 5:59 PM, keltoi said:

yeah doesn't sound like too much to ask.

not sounding like the most open minded of people franklin.

I know... I was never religious, but I used to be very open to other people believing whatever they like. But my opinion has changed. About the only situation I can tolerate it is when dealing with my clients who are sometimes religious. I am easily able to bite my tongue when it comes to being a professional.

  On 3/22/2012 at 6:18 PM, jefferoo said:

  On 3/22/2012 at 5:17 PM, Bob Dobalina said:

Franklin, I was brought up and confirmed catholic but have long since parted ways. Mrs. Dob and I had a catholic wedding though, and now the time is nigh to have our infant daughter baptized. The only reason we did / will do these things is to humor our parents, particularly hers as they had a priest in the family (since deceased). If he's your friend, I'd say bite your tongue, humor him, and try to think about baseball or sex throughout the entire service, maybe ogle a bridesmaid or two.

 

It's funny talking to my parents (who are way more open-minded) about catholicism, basically they're as disillusioned about the church as we are, but like that scene where darth vader is bringing luke to the emperor, it's too late for them. What with their irish/italian/french canadian parents, catholic school upbringings, etc.

 

Truth bullets.

 

Just put yourself in your friend's shoes. It's important for him to be surrounded by his close buds at a very intimate moment.

I got married about a year and a half ago (in a very non-religious ceremony) and if any of my groomsmen would have declined, it would have really hurt my feelings. All he's doing is showing you that you are important to him. You should feel honored. Just sayin.

Yes I absolutely agree with both of you guys. I had already (before the thread) told my friend that I would participate in any sort of ritual even short of harming a person or animal in order to be in his wedding party. I know it's important to him I'm just worried about how composed I'll be able to be. I'm jesting somewhat about my abilities by the way.

  On 3/22/2012 at 6:52 PM, Fred McGriff said:

franklin you'd be wonderful at an indian wedding

Fred this brings up something really cool: weddings of this sort don't bother me at all. I'm going to think about the exact reasons why but I have ideas about it.

  On 3/22/2012 at 7:16 PM, Springymajig said:

If you REALLY are this bothered about it, then you're pretty much as bad as the Christians who hate gay people for no good reason other than the Bible says to. Let's try an experiment:

 

  On 3/22/2012 at 4:17 PM, Franklin said:

one of my best friends is getting married to a dude. So I had to do a similar gay wedding last summer with another one of my good friends and I happened to be sitting beside the couple that are getting married this year and I was not really behaving myself because I have zero patience for ignorant things like fag marriages or gays in general... It actually angers me so much that my heart rate in noticeable. why the fuck are we wasting our time with this fairy bullshit in this day and age?

 

I'm obviously not going to be a douche and fuck up a wedding but I'm going to have to do some serious deep breathing exercises over the next couple of months to keep myself in check.

 

I didn't have to change much.

No springy I completely disagree. You could change it to a "snake" or a "corpse" just as easily and both of us would likely not respect the marriage. If you thought either of those were gross or something I could argue that you're just not open-minded enough. And both have been done by individuals or groups of people in different cultures around the world, even in recent years.

I just really dislike the idea of belief in something that cannot be falsified. Especially when things become highly ritualized and when people celebrate the idea of "faith" in something that they know they cannot prove or disprove. Like the great Bertrand Russell says in that clip we should suspend judgement on matters that we cannot prove.

"it seems to me a fundamental dishonesty and a fundamental treachery to intellectual integrity to hold a belief because you think it's useful and not because you think it's true."

I am excited kinda to be living in the age of the new atheism and agree with people like Harris that in some ways the moderates hold up human progress even more than the fundamentalists.

So, when I'm looking around myself at these weddings at my friends and loved ones and seeing some of them mouthing rituals or shouting "Praise his name" and starting down paths that lead towards the moderate religious path (just like Bob Dobs parents etc) where it becomes likely that the kids will go that way and then their kids will go that way and ON and ON, I get really angry.

humans have the capacity to be smarter, more resourceful, more open and honest, and frankly more moral than religion teaches us to be.

geez sorry guys.

Pretend you are possessed by the demon of diarrhea and shit all over the place.

Just don't take your children.

If you have children.

(Because all Catholics are pedophiles who desire to rape your children.)

oh yes Pod, every single one.

  On 3/22/2012 at 11:45 PM, Franklin said:

oh yes Pod, every single one.

Try not having sex all your life, then surround yourself with easy preys. I believe all priests that are abstinent think about fucking children all the time,just not all of them act on those desires.

  On 3/22/2012 at 11:49 PM, YO303 said:

 

 

Try not having sex all your life

not a problem for most IDM nerds.