I;m having problems

I've been very ill lately, Ive had/got Pneumonia and a lung infection, havent written alot of material lately, however, Ive had these 2 for a good while and I am ripping my hair out over what to do with them, I've tried every variation and nothing seems right, I dont have anyone else to share them with so I though this is as good a place as any to get suggestions, dont expect too much from them, but having said that a few words about what you do /dont like is appreciated. Thank you.

not heard the tunes yet - will check them later - but just to say get well soon Jaffa mate...doesnt sound too good at all, hope you is getting betta!

Thanks!!

shit yeah get well soon that sounds pretty serious. Fireworks doesn't need anything else in my opinion. It's a great track. One of your best. Monstrosal flunders is good but could do with a bit more percussion maybe? dunno

Listening to Monstrosal Flunders now......I'm liking it a lot - maybe a bit too heavy on the bass, seems to be distorting a bit and drowning out some of the other sounds. Love it when the electro beats kicks in around 1:43....I think those laser type noises are unnecessary..........or maybe just too loud in the mix.......but yeah, like it overall - nice synth pad, nice beats, good track!

Now on to Fireworks 6......Yeah! Nice break to open! Quality bassline..........but again, sounds maybe a little to er, bassy, if you know what I mean......ah....now a second bassline....working nicely with the break, still reckon it's too loud though......nice chime sounds - a little Arpanet-y.........yeah this is a really good track mate.....wicked progression.......overall, liked it loads too, probably prefer this to Monstrosal Flunders...

I dunno mate, they're really good! If anything, maybe a little too much going on...you could try thinning them out a bit and maybe easing up on the bass, but I don't reckon much needs doing to them really.

Nice one.

Thanks mate, yeah its been pretty bad, been on 500mg moxycillin antibiotics for about 3 weeks and had 2 x-ray scans, going back on the 4th may to see if my lungs are any better, it was awful without going into all of it, i coudnt lie on either side at night without screaming in pain, i literally had to sleep upright, just from exhaustion falling into sleep , plus coughing up blood and phlegm. Bit of a wake up call really as far as me smoking 60 a day goes. fingers crossed.

thanks BCM, i missed your comments, yeah i guess i could thin out some of fireworks, it does seem abit too busy at times, too many contrasting melody lines and bass, yeah , i dunno, half and half on it, but maybe abit overpowering, haha, i went downstairs before and the kitchen table was rattling, i have good speakers ;-) thanks again folks

60 a day??? jebus. yeah that'll kill you mate

  G. I. McGriff said:

60 a day??? jebus. yeah that'll kill you mate

yeah..I have an addictive personality disorder, im quite a troubled person.

  Jaffa said:

thanks BCM, i missed your comments, yeah i guess i could thin out some of fireworks, it does seem abit too busy at times, too many contrasting melody lines and bass, yeah , i dunno, half and half on it, but maybe abit overpowering, haha, i went downstairs before and the kitchen table was rattling, i have good speakers ;-) thanks again folks

Word.