JJ Abrams might make a Half-life or Portal film

http://www.polygon.com/2013/2/6/3960102/half-life-portal-movies-jj-abrams-valve

cool i guess!

no. just stop. please stop. just because abrams is a self confessed geek doesn't mean he has rights to every single nerdy genre property in the universe. so fucking sick of this guy and his hack mystery box bullshit.

I'm sure a Portal movie would benefit from lens flares...

:wipes the vomit off chin:

:vomits again:

:cries:

:absent-mindedly masturbates, but just a little:

  On 2/6/2013 at 11:49 PM, dese manz hatin said:

Hah!!!

somebody has to dethrone the Super Mario Bros movie as worst ever game to film adaptation. doom came close. this may have potential...

so its popular then on watmm. Excellent

well, i enjoyed what he did with star wars, so i have faith he won't completely ruin this one

  On 2/7/2013 at 1:22 AM, Nebraska said:

well, i enjoyed what he did with star wars, so i have faith he won't completely ruin this one

same

  On 2/6/2013 at 11:49 PM, dese manz hatin said:

lol

Why not? If both VALVe and JJ work together it could be great. JJ is ok in my book anyway.

Before cloverfield I remember there was a small teaser game released as part of it's viral campaign I think it was made by Valve, am I wrong? it was really really small but it was good for what it was.

I understand the doubt. Is the story strong enough for a movie?

Dunno, I mean, i love the story but thats because I experienced it through the main character eyes, with a gravity gun etc. How the fuck do they turn it into a film. I imagine a lot of stuff being cut out, that's inevitable.

Would they even keep the headcrabs, a blatant rip-off of the alien chestbursters.

Excited by it because I naively believe that nothing can go wrong in the world of HL and valve.

  On 2/7/2013 at 1:07 AM, MisterE said:

somebody has to dethrone the Super Mario Bros movie as worst ever game to film adaptation. doom came close. this may have potential...

Doom looked soooo bland - I didn't even bother watching it. Once I read they scrapped the hell portal on Mars' moon plot I asked myself "what's the fucking point then?"

i want alfonso cuaron to make a half life film. there's nothing about portal that strikes me as film worthy.

i think doom had more potential to make a good movie, because doom's actual story was not very good, but then it was kind of non-existent. i mean, you have the mars moon base, then you go to hell. BUT the setup was pretty cool actually. the story of the details couldn't be fleshed out but that wasn't the point, the point was killing monsters. the idea of a mars moon base (granted it doesn't make sense due to how small those moons are) with experimental portals tapping into hell, that's a cool idea. demons coming through, zombie possessions, could be a setup to a very cool movie if the story was done well.

half life is like the exact opposite. the setup is bland and generic. aliens and stuff, basically. almost every element does seem directly pulled right out of something else. BUT it had a great story. the story there was more of a thing that you experience as you play, and that was part of what made it great. so i don't see how it could be made into a great movie. i think doom could have, because it provided a framework of cool concepts within which a great story might be told. half-life provided a bland framework, but made a cool story out of it that probably only works in game form. but in movie form i mean how does that translate? is a guy going to be throwing chunks of wood around on a beach to jump from one piece to another to avoid alerting giant bugs? ugh..

I'd pay top dollar for Alfonso Cuaron to make a Thief film, following the storyline of the original game. Garrett!

  On 2/7/2013 at 3:01 AM, MisterE said:

i think doom had more potential to make a good movie, because doom's actual story was not very good, but then it was kind of non-existent. i mean, you have the mars moon base, then you go to hell. BUT the setup was pretty cool actually. the story of the details couldn't be fleshed out but that wasn't the point, the point was killing monsters. the idea of a mars moon base (granted it doesn't make sense due to how small those moons are) with experimental portals tapping into hell, that's a cool idea. demons coming through, zombie possessions, could be a setup to a very cool movie if the story was done well.

When you put it that way, I think it could have been made into a decent movie. Have the beginning of the film with pacing akin to Alien or Valhalla Rising, but then rev it up so it changes from a thriller into more of an action film. I guess 28 Days Later did this. It just gets faster and faster. Just have some zombies and imps.

Start it out with him being sent to Mars for punching his commanding officer, and then end it with him entering the portal into hell. Or at least forshadowing that he'll enter it. Bam, a sequel. More demons. Enter into an atmosphere kind of like Hellraiser.

Anybody writing this down?

I'm not sure about this. I can certainly say a portal movie would be just absolutely stupid though. Half Life, well for starters they would need to get someone identical to Gordon Freeman to even think about doing it justice. I could see it potentially being interesting but they would definitely need to retain everything that makes Half Life Half Life. This includes the headcrabs and various zombie types, the combine and their life support sirens that go off when they die, the flying ships and those loud annoying orbs that follow you around.

So I could see it being interesting but only if they stick very closely to the original formula. If their planning on doing Half Life way back in the black mesa days I think it would be more challenging as there are less actual characters and less plot there. I'm not instantly turned off, and pretty much everything Gabe Newell is involved in turns out pretty spectacular so I doubt he'd let his baby get bastardized by bad filmmaking.

If they made a Half-Life movie, whom would they cast as actors? (rhetorical question...kind of)

Well they can't center it around Gordon Freeman. He doesn't talk. I do like the Half-Life universe, but JJ Abrams... Meh... Do not want.

i would trade 100 shitty game-to-movie adaptations for one Half Life 3

Michael Cranston would of course be a shoo-in (though he's getting a bit too craggy maybe). See for ref the Gordon Freeman-esque Breaking Bad box art

oh yeah and fuck JJ Abrams

Bryan Cranston.