what are the first symptoms of coronavirus???

nobody really knows... some suggestions from the other thread:

  On 3/7/2020 at 5:48 AM, darreichungsform said:

I've heard the first symptom of Corona is a subtle fear...

  On 3/7/2020 at 5:50 AM, Lada Laika said:

i thought it was being a liberal

  On 3/7/2020 at 5:52 AM, MIXL2 said:

not being manly enough also

 

 

not liking idm

  On 3/7/2020 at 6:09 AM, Lada Laika said:

anyone who says “sean pls” is automatically infected

does anyone know???

It seems people are desperately fighting over toilet paper at grocery stores so I'd say, massive shits.

If you have ever been accused of being a boomer

Can understood a few words of Mandarin

Exit a bathroom within a few seconds of flushing

Have recently spluttered your glass of water after it went down the wrong pipe or lol'd your morning coffee

Come back from a musical festival looking a bit worse for wear

The first two weeks you have coronavirus you have no symptoms at all, and during this time you can spread it very easily. This is why everyone is freaking out and why testing is failing at catching a lot of cases.

Best case scenario: After 2 weeks you will get a dry cough and fever, possibly a runny nose, and a few days after it will turn to shortness of breath and pneumonia. During the next 3 days of the shortness of breath and pneumonia, you will feel like you will want to die. After the pneumonia and shortness of breath recides (another two weeks), you'll have a cough for a while longer. This is the best case scenario.

Worst case scenario: When the shortness of breath and pneumonia occur, the virus will enter through the blood brain barrier and cause havoc on your apnea regions of the brain (breathing, heart beat, etc...) and will do damage to your lungs, kidneys, then finally liver. If you survive this, your overall lifespan on this planet will be shortened.

dude, fucking stop it with this shit. fucking fear mongering idiot... this thread is for the lulz you doom sayer.

gtfo.

It's not strength to deny; it's strength to give in.

WATSS: We are the Super Spreaders

  On 3/7/2020 at 12:40 PM, Entorwellian said:

It's not strength to deny; it's strength to give in.

WATSS: We are the Super Spreaders

why give in depressed and crying in the shower when u can give in dancing ur ass off?

The first symptom of coronavirus is: you do not talk about coronavirus. The second symptom of coronavirus is: you do not talk about coronavirus. Third symptom of coronavirus: someone yells "stop!", goes limp, taps out, the coronavirus is over. Fourth symptom of coronavirus: only two symptoms to a coronavirus.

Announce on social media with link to your gofundme campaign

First sign is that you start to like the first 2 tracks from Squarepushers latest. And then, all of a sudden it hitsonu. You've got COVID-19-ed!

  On 3/7/2020 at 9:59 AM, Entorwellian said:

The first two weeks you have coronavirus you have no symptoms at all, and during this time you can spread it very easily. This is why everyone is freaking out and why testing is failing at catching a lot of cases.

Best case scenario: After 2 weeks you will get a dry cough and fever, possibly a runny nose, and a few days after it will turn to shortness of breath and pneumonia. During the next 3 days of the shortness of breath and pneumonia, you will feel like you will want to die. After the pneumonia and shortness of breath recides (another two weeks), you'll have a cough for a while longer. This is the best case scenario.

Worst case scenario: When the shortness of breath and pneumonia occur, the virus will enter through the blood brain barrier and cause havoc on your apnea regions of the brain (breathing, heart beat, etc...) and will do damage to your lungs, kidneys, then finally liver. If you survive this, your overall lifespan on this planet will be shortened.

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You seem to be sincerely concerned by this and me telling you that fear weakens the immune system won't help with the fear, I guess.

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

Waking up without an erection.

Supporting an English football club.

  On 3/7/2020 at 3:06 PM, Psychotronic said:

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

  On 3/7/2020 at 3:01 PM, darreichungsform said:

You seem to be sincerely concerned by this and me telling you that fear weakens the immune system won't help with the fear, I guess.

I am very concerned about this.

Confusion and panic buying random household items, especially toilet paper. 

Wearing odd head garments 

1. masturbating furiously
2. just clicking around on excel empty cells while on the community train
3. calling pedophiles to discogs sellers
4. over using reaction emoticons on this thread

Buying large amounts of much bread, noodles, or rice

Adding videos to "Watch Later" or "My Saved" lists

Using social media

Insomnia

  On 3/8/2020 at 1:26 AM, Stickfigger said:

Being a mean cunt online and being a sad cunt IRL

 

…. =(

I have coronavirus don't I? =(

Waking up with swollen genitals in the morning

  On 3/7/2020 at 6:28 AM, MIXL2 said:

does anyone know???

I hope it's not headaches and garlicky farts.