HOOOLEEEE SHIT

  Capsaicin said:

I like the japanese spider crabs

I like you. :heart:

When I was a young boy, about age 9, I fished in a lake near my house with friends. We would often catch crabs on our line or net them for fun. Blue pincher crabs were plentiful on the rocks lakeside.

One day, I caught a huge one that remained still on the grass. I went to pick it up by its abdomen to enjoy the happiness that waving a crab around creates. It was so fast that I didn't even see its pincher grasp my right thumb, right on the joint. The pain was so sharp and unexpected that I whipped the crab around, which created a "tack tack tack" sound as the boney crab impacted itself and my forearm. The crab flew about 20 feet away into the grass, but, to my astonishment, its pincher remained on my bloody thumb. Its grip was unceasing! I tried as best as I could to unhook its claw from my thumb, but all attempts seemed pointless after about 15 seconds. The pain was unbearable.

I decided that the only way I could remove the pincher was to pull it off of my thumb, which would cut me even more due to its extremely firm grip. In my panicked state, with my adrenaline surging, I grabbed the broken joint-end of the pincher and yanked it from my thumb. It was easier than I thought because the result was a great feeling of relief as the pincher was finally separated from my thumb.

My thumb was almost sliced in 360 degrees, but the cut wasn't that deep and I didn't require stitches.

Revenge on the crab was swift, and I bent the metal rim of my fishing net badly.

The inside of the crab abdomen was beautiful! It was such a surprise. Bubbles rose through, what looked like seawater, from beneath what seemed to be organic tissue that actually looked similar to colored tissue paper, for about five minutes after I broke open the crab during my angry rage. There were three colors of tissue in the abdomen: blue, yellow and green. That's as far as I went with my crab anatomy lesson as I thought it best to go home to fix my thumb.

Pictured, left, is a blue pincher crab:

Lesson learnt son, lesson learnt.

I sure hope you ate the fuck out of that crab

  Funktion said:

  nene multiple assgasms said:

 

 

SEND IT TO HELL

Needs fixing Takeshi^^.

fuck this fucking thread!

<screams like a bitch, runs away crying>

i fucking love starship troopers.

  Tony Danza said:

I like you. :heart:

 

When I was a young boy, about age 9, I fished in a lake near my house with friends. We would often catch crabs on our line or net them for fun. Blue pincher crabs were plentiful on the rocks lakeside.

 

One day, I caught a huge one that remained still on the grass. I went to pick it up by its abdomen to enjoy the happiness that waving a crab around creates. It was so fast that I didn't even see its pincher grasp my right thumb, right on the joint. The pain was so sharp and unexpected that I whipped the crab around, which created a "tack tack tack" sound as the boney crab impacted itself and my forearm. The crab flew about 20 feet away into the grass, but, to my astonishment, its pincher remained on my bloody thumb. Its grip was unceasing! I tried as best as I could to unhook its claw from my thumb, but all attempts seemed pointless after about 15 seconds. The pain was unbearable.

 

I decided that the only way I could remove the pincher was to pull it off of my thumb, which would cut me even more due to its extremely firm grip. In my panicked state, with my adrenaline surging, I grabbed the broken joint-end of the pincher and yanked it from my thumb. It was easier than I thought because the result was a great feeling of relief as the pincher was finally separated from my thumb.

 

My thumb was almost sliced in 360 degrees, but the cut wasn't that deep and I didn't require stitches.

 

Revenge on the crab was swift, and I bent the metal rim of my fishing net badly.

 

The inside of the crab abdomen was beautiful! It was such a surprise. Bubbles rose through, what looked like seawater, from beneath what seemed to be organic tissue that actually looked similar to colored tissue paper, for about five minutes after I broke open the crab during my angry rage. There were three colors of tissue in the abdomen: blue, yellow and green. That's as far as I went with my crab anatomy lesson as I thought it best to go home to fix my thumb.

 

 

Pictured, left, is a blue pincher crab:

this is a beautiful story

  Thisket said:

this is a beautiful story

Thanks! I'm glad you liked it.

i got my wrist latched onto by an octopus as a young boy and i still have an awesome scar from it. those fuckers are relentless. i also stepped on a crab, big crab, but it couldn't lynch me cause of the angles.