9 beers

i still have 4 beers left but since the internet is so boring i think i'm going to go to bed

goodnight watmm

  weed said:

watmms boring

i've noticed a lot of threads you post are about you, what's up with that?

  roasty said:

  weed said:

watmms boring

 

i've noticed a lot of threads you post are about you, what's up with that?

 

ANSWER:

shooter still at large

looks kie a vqginq

A numerical investigation of a supersonic mixed-compression inlet is carried out. The inlet is designed for Mach 2.5 by applying the Method of Characteristics. Realistic ramp bleed and throat bypass systems are simulated by a two-dimensional, finite volume, multiblock Total Variation Diminishing (TVD) Navier-Stokes code. From the calculations, the roles of ramp bleed and throat bypass systems are revealed. The mechanism for improving the pressure recovery ahead of an inlet upstart is found for the first time in detail. The results show that the throat gap, or slot, constructs an optimum equivalent wall configuration automatically by the flow conditions around the systems. This result can be obtained because of the great advantage of the computational fluid dynamics (CFD) approach.

  my usernames always really suck said:

THE STORY OF PRINCE AGIB

 

 

I was a king, and the son of a king; and when my father died, I

succeeded to his throne, and governed my subjects with justice and

beneficence. I took pleasure in sea-voyages; and my capital was on the

shore of an extensive sea, interspersed with fortified and garrisoned

islands, which I desired, for my amusement, to visit; I therefore

embarked with a fleet of ten ships, and took with me provisions

sufficient for a whole month. I proceeded twenty days, after which there

arose against us a contrary wind; but at daybreak it ceased, and the sea

became calm, and we arrived at an island, where we landed, and cooked

some provisions and ate; after which we remained there two days. We then

continued our voyage; and when twenty days more had passed, we found

ourselves in strange waters, unknown to the captain, and desired the

watch to look out from the mast head: so he went aloft, and when he had

come down he said to the captain: "I saw, on my right hand, fish

floating upon the surface of the water; and looking toward the midst of

the sea, I perceived something looming in the distance, sometimes black,

and sometimes white."

 

When the captain heard this report of the watch, he threw his turban on

the deck, and plucked his beard, and said to those who were with him:

"Receive warning of our destruction, which will befall all of us: not

one will escape!" So saying, he began to weep; and all of us in like

manner bewailed our lot. I desired him to inform us of that which the

watch had seen. "O my lord," he replied, "know that we have wandered

from our course since the commencement of the contrary wind that was

followed in the morning by a calm, in consequence of which we remained

stationary two days: from that period we have deviated from our course

for twenty-one days, and we have no wind to carry us back from the fate

which awaits us after this day. To-morrow we shall arrive at a mountain

of black stone, called loadstone: the current is now bearing us

violently toward it, and the ships will fall in pieces, and every nail

in them will fly to the mountain, and adhere to it; for God hath given

to the loadstone a secret property by virtue of which everything of iron

is attracted toward it. On that mountain is such a quantity of iron as

no one knoweth but God, whose name be exalted; for from times of old

great numbers of ships have been destroyed by the influence of that

mountain. There is, upon the summit of the mountain, a cupola of brass

supported by ten columns, and upon the top of this is a horseman upon a

horse of brass, having in his hand a brazen spear, and upon his breast

suspended a tablet of lead, upon which are engraved mysterious names and

talismans: and as long, O King, as this horseman remains upon the horse,

so long will every ship that approaches be destroyed, with every person

on board, and all the iron contained in it will cleave to the mountain:

no one will be safe until the horseman shall have fallen from the

horse." The captain then wept bitterly; and we felt assured that our

destruction was inevitable, and every one of us bade adieu to his

friend.

 

On the following morning we drew near to the mountain; the current

carried us toward it with violence, and when the ships were almost close

to it, they fell asunder, and all the nails, and everything else that

was of iron, flew from them toward the loadstone. It was near the close

of day when the ships fell in pieces. Some of us were drowned, and some

escaped; but the greater number were drowned, and of those who saved

their lives none know what became of the others, so stupefied were they

by the waves and the boisterous wind. As for myself, God, whose name be

exalted, spared me on account of the trouble and torment and affliction

that He had predestined to befall me. I placed myself upon a plank, and

the wind and waves cast it upon the mountain; and when I had landed, I

found a practicable way to the summit, resembling steps cut in the rock:

so I exclaimed: "In the name of God!" and offered up a prayer, and

attempted the ascent, holding fast by the notches; and presently God

stilled the wind, so that I arrived in safety at the summit. Rejoicing

greatly in my escape, I immediately entered the cupola, and performed

prayers in gratitude to God for my preservation; after which I slept

beneath the cupola, and heard a voice saying to me: "O son of Khasib,

when thou awakest, dig beneath thy feet, and thou wilt find a bow of

brass, and three arrows of lead, whereon are engraved talismans: then

take the bow and arrows and shoot at the horseman that is upon the top

of the cupola, and relieve mankind from this great affliction; for when

thou hast shot at the horseman he will fall into the sea; the bow will

also fall, and do thou bury it in its place; and as soon as thou hast

done this, the sea will swell and rise until it attains the summit of

the mountain; and there will appear upon it a boat bearing a man,

different from him whom thou shalt have cast down, and he will come to

thee, having an oar in his hand: then do thou embark with him; but utter

not the name of God; and he will convey thee in ten days to a safe sea,

where, on thy arrival, thou wilt find one who will take thee to thy

city. All this shall be done if thou utter not the name of God."

 

Awaking from my sleep, I sprang up, and did as the voice had directed. I

shot at the horseman, and he fell into the sea; and the bow having

fallen from my hand, I buried it: the sea then became troubled, and rose

to the summit of the mountain, and when I had stood waiting there a

little while, I beheld a boat in the midst of the sea, approaching me. I

praised God, whose name be exalted, and when the boat came to me, I

found in it a man of brass, with a tablet of lead upon his breast,

engraven with names and talismans. Without uttering a word, I embarked

in the boat, and the man rowed me ten successive days, after which I

beheld the islands of security, whereupon, in the excess of my joy, I

exclaimed: "There is no deity but God! God is most great!"--and as soon

as I had done this, the man cast me out of the boat, and sank in the

sea.

 

Being able to swim, I swam until night, when my arms and shoulders were

tired, and, in this perilous situation, I repeated the profession of the

faith, and gave myself up as lost; but the sea rose with the violence of

the wind, and a wave like a vast castle threw me upon the land, in order

to the accomplishment of the purpose of God. I ascended the shore, and

after I had wrung out my clothes, and spread them upon the ground to

dry, I slept; and in the morning I put on my clothes again, and, looking

about to see which way I should go, I found a tract covered with trees;

and when I had walked round it, I found that I was upon a small island

in the midst of the sea; upon which I said within myself: "Every time

that I escape from one calamity I fall into another that is worse:" but

while I was reflecting upon my unfortunate case, and wishing for death,

I beheld a vessel bearing a number of men. I arose immediately, and

climbed into a tree; and lo, the vessel came to the shore, and there

landed from it ten black slaves bearing axes. They proceeded to the

middle of the island, and, digging up the earth, uncovered and lifted up

a trap-door, after which they returned to the vessel, and brought from

it bread and flour, and clarified butter and honey, and sheep and

everything that the wants of an inhabitant would require, continuing to

pass backward and forward between the vessel and the trap-door, bringing

loads from the former, and entering the latter, until they had removed

all the stores from the ship. They then came out of the vessel with

various clothes of the most beautiful description, and in the midst of

them was an old sheikh, enfeebled and wasted by extreme age, leading by

the hand a young man cast in the mould of graceful symmetry, and

invested with such perfect beauty as deserved to be a subject for

proverbs. He was like a fresh and slender twig, enchanting and

captivating every heart by his elegant form. The party proceeded to the

trap-door, and, entering it, became concealed from my eyes.

 

They remained beneath about two hours, or more; after which, the sheikh

and the slaves came out; but the youth came not with them; and they

replaced the earth, and embarked and set sail. Soon after, I descended

from the tree, and went to the excavation. I removed the earth, and,

entering the aperture, saw a flight of wooden steps, which I descended;

and, at the bottom, I beheld a handsome dwelling-place, furnished with a

variety of silken carpets; and there was the youth, sitting upon a high

mattress, with sweet-smelling flowers and fruits placed before him. On

seeing me, his countenance became pale; but I saluted him, and said:

"Let thy mind be composed, O my master: thou hast nothing to fear; for I

am a man, and the son of a king, like thyself: fate hath impelled me to

thee, that I may cheer thee in thy solitude." The youth, when he heard

me thus address him, and was convinced that I was one of his own

species, rejoiced exceedingly at my arrival, his colour returned, and,

desiring me to approach him, he said: "O my brother, my story is

wonderful: my father is a jeweller; he had slaves who made voyages

by his orders, for the purposes of commerce, and he had dealings with

kings; but he had never been blest with a son; and he dreamt that he was

soon to have a son, but one whose life would be short; and he awoke

sorrowful. Shortly after, in accordance with the decrees of God, my

mother gave birth to me; and my father was greatly rejoiced: the

astrologers, however, came to him, and said: Thy son will live fifteen

years: his fate is intimated by the fact that there is in the sea a

mountain called the Mountain of Loadstone, whereon is a horseman on a

horse of brass, on the former of which is a tablet of lead suspended to

his neck; and when the horseman shall be thrown down from his horse, thy

son will be slain: the person who is to slay him is he who will throw

down the horseman, and his name is King Agib, the son of King Khasib. My

father was greatly afflicted at this announcement; and when he had

reared me until I had nearly attained the age of fifteen years, the

astrologers came again, and informed him that the horseman had fallen

into the sea, and that it had been thrown down by King Agib, the son of

King Khasib; on hearing which, he prepared for me this dwelling, and

here left me to remain until the completion of the term, of which there

now remain ten days. All this he did from fear lest King Agib should

kill me."

 

[illustration]

 

_And when the boat came to me I found in it a man of brass, with a

tablet of lead upon his breast, engraven with names and talismans._

 

When I heard this, I was filled with wonder, and said within myself: "I

am King Agib, the son of King Khasib, and it was I who threw down the

horseman; but, by Allah, I will neither kill him nor do him any injury."

Then said I to the youth: "Far from thee be both destruction and harm,

if it be the will of God: thou hast nothing to fear: I will remain with

thee to serve thee, and will go forth with thee to thy father, and beg

of him to send me back to my country, for the which he will obtain a

reward." The youth rejoiced at my words, and I sat and conversed with

him until night, when I spread his bed for him, and covered him, and

slept near to his side. And in the morning I brought him water, and he

washed his face, and said to me: "May God requite thee for me with every

blessing. If I escape from King Agib, I will make my father reward thee

with abundant favours." "Never," I replied, "may the day arrive that

would bring thee misfortune!" I then placed before him some

refreshments, and after we had eaten together, we passed the day

conversing with the utmost cheerfulness.

 

I continued to serve him for nine days; and on the tenth day the youth

rejoiced at finding himself in safety, and said to me: "O my brother, I

wish that thou wouldst in thy kindness warm for me some water, that I

may wash myself and change my clothes; for I have smelt the odour of

escape from death, in consequence of thy assistance." "With pleasure," I

replied; and I arose, and warmed the water; after which, he entered a

place concealed from my view, and, having washed himself and changed his

clothes, laid himself upon the mattress to rest after his bath. He then

said to me: "Cut up for me, O my brother, a water-melon, and mix its

juice with some sugar:" so I arose, and, taking a melon, brought it upon

a plate, and said to him; "Knowest thou, O my master, where is the

knife?" "See, here it is," he answered, "upon the shelf over my head." I

sprang up hastily, and took it from its sheath, and as I was drawing

back, my foot slipped, as God had decreed, and I fell upon the youth,

grasping in my hand the knife, which entered his body, and he died

instantly. When I perceived that he was dead, and that I had killed him,

I uttered a loud shriek, and beat my face, and rent my clothes: saying:

"This is, indeed, a calamity! O my Lord, I implore thy pardon, and

declare to Thee my innocence of his death! Would that I had died before

him!"

 

With these reflections I ascended the steps, and, having replaced the

trap-door, returned to my first station, and looked over the sea, where

I saw the vessel that had come before, approaching, and cleaving the

waves in its rapid course. Upon this I said within myself: "Now will the

men come forth from the vessel, and find the youth slain, and they will

slay me also:" so I climbed into a tree, and concealed myself among its

leaves, and sat there till the vessel arrived and cast anchor, when the

slaves landed with the old sheikh, the father of the youth, and went to

the place, and removed the earth. They were surprised at finding it

moist, and, when they had descended the steps, they discovered the youth

lying on his back, exhibiting a face beaming with beauty, though dead,

and clad in white and clean clothing, with the knife remaining in his

body. They all wept at the sight, and the father fell down in a swoon,

which lasted so long that the slaves thought he was dead. At length,

however, he recovered, and came out with the slaves, who had wrapped the

body of the youth in his clothes. They then took back all that was in

the subterranean dwelling to the vessel, and departed.

 

I remained, by day hiding myself in a tree, and at night walking about

the open part of the island. Thus I continued for the space of two

months; and I perceived that, on the western side of the island, the

water of the sea every day retired, until, after three months, the land

that had been beneath it became dry. Rejoicing at this, and feeling

confident now in my escape, I traversed this dry tract, and arrived at

an expanse of sand; whereupon I emboldened myself, and crossed it. I

then saw in the distance an appearance of fire, and, advancing toward

it, found it to be a palace, overlaid with plates of red copper, which,

reflecting the rays of the sun, seemed from a distance to be fire: and

when I drew near to it, reflecting upon this sight, there approached me

an old sheikh, accompanied by ten young men who were all blind of one

eye, at which I was extremely surprised. As soon as they saw me, they

saluted me, and asked me my story, which I related to them from first to

last; and they were filled with wonder. They then conducted me into the

palace, where I saw ten benches, upon each of which was a mattress

covered with a blue stuff; and each of the young men seated himself upon

one of these benches, while the sheikh took his place upon a smaller

one; after which they said to me: "Sit down, O young man, and ask no

question respecting our condition, nor respecting our being blind of one

eye." Then the sheikh arose, and brought to each of them some food, and

the same to me also; and next he brought to each of us some wine: and

after we had eaten, we sat drinking together until the time for sleep,

when the young men said to the sheikh: "Bring to us our accustomed

supply"--upon which the sheikh arose, and entered a closet, from which

he brought, upon his head, ten covered trays. Placing these upon the

floor, he lighted ten candles, and stuck one of them upon each tray;

and, having done this, he removed the covers, and there appeared beneath

them ashes mixed with pounded charcoal. The young men then tucked up

their sleeves above the elbow, and blackened their faces, and slapped

their cheeks, exclaiming: "We were reposing at our ease, and our

impertinent curiosity suffered us not to remain so!" Thus they did until

the morning, when the sheikh brought them some hot water, and they

washed their faces, and put on other clothes.

 

On witnessing this conduct, my reason was confounded, my heart was so

troubled that I forgot my own misfortunes, and I asked them the cause of

their strange behaviour; upon which they looked toward me, and said: "O

young man, ask not respecting that which doth not concern thee; but be

silent; for in silence is security from error." I remained with them a

whole month, during which, every night they did the same, and at length

I said to them: "I conjure you by Allah to remove this disquiet from my

mind, and to inform me of the cause of your acting in this manner, and

of your exclaiming; 'We were reposing at our ease, and our impertinent

curiosity suffered us not to remain so!' if ye inform me not, I will

leave you, and go my way." On hearing these words, they replied: "We

have not concealed this affair from thee but in our concern for thy

welfare, lest thou shouldst become like us, and the same affliction that

hath befallen us happen also to thee." I said, however: "Ye must

positively inform me of this matter." "We give thee good advice," said

they, "and do thou receive it, and ask us not respecting our case;

otherwise thou wilt become blind of one eye, like us"--but I still

persisted in my request; whereupon they said: "O young man, if this

befall thee, know that thou wilt be banished from our company." They

then all arose, and, taking a ram, slaughtered and skinned it, and said

to me: "Take this knife with thee, and introduce thyself into the skin

of the ram, and we will sew thee up in it, and go away; whereupon a bird

called the roc will come to thee, and, taking thee up by its talons,

will fly away with thee, and set thee down upon a mountain: then cut

open the skin with this knife, and get out, and the bird will fly away.

Thou must arise, as soon as it hath gone, and journey for half a day,

and thou wilt see before thee a lofty palace, encased with red gold, set

with various precious stones such as emeralds and rubies; and if thou

enter it thy case will be as ours; for our entrance into that palace was

the cause of our being blind of one eye; and if one of us would relate

to thee all that hath befallen him, his story would be too long for thee

to hear."

 

They then sewed me up in the skin, and entered their palace; and soon

after, there came an enormous white bird, which seized me, and flew away

with me, and set me down upon the mountain; whereupon I cut open the

skin, and got out; and the bird, as soon as it saw me, flew away. I rose

up quickly, and proceeded toward the palace, which I found to be as they

had described it to me; and when I had entered it, I beheld, at the

upper end of a saloon, forty young damsels, beautiful as so many moons,

and magnificently attired, who, as soon as they saw me, exclaimed:

"Welcome! Welcome! O our master and our lord! We have been for a month

expecting thee. Praise be to God who hath blessed us with one who is

worthy of us, and one of whom we are worthy!" After having thus greeted

me, they seated me upon a mattress, and said; "Thou art from this day

our master and prince, and we are thy handmaids, and entirely under thy

authority." They then brought to me some refreshments, and, when I had

eaten and drunk, they sat and conversed with me, full of joy and

happiness. So lovely were these ladies, that even a devotee, if he saw

them, would gladly consent to be their servant, and to comply with all

that they would desire. At the approach of night they all assembled

around me, and placed before me a table of fresh and dried fruits, with

other delicacies that the tongue cannot describe, and wine; and one

began to sing, while another played upon the lute. The wine-cups

circulated among us, and joy overcame me to such a degree as to

obliterate from my mind every earthly care, and make me exclaim: "This

is indeed a delightful life!" I passed a night of such enjoyment as I

had never before experienced; and on the morrow I entered the bath; and,

after I had washed myself, they brought me a suit of the richest

clothing, and we again sat down to a repast.

 

In this manner I lived with them a whole year; but on the first day of

the new year, they seated themselves around me, and began to weep, and

bade me farewell, clinging to my skirts. "What calamity hath befallen

you?" said I. "Ye are breaking my heart." They answered: "Would that we

had never known thee; for we have associated with many men, but have

seen none like thee. May God, therefore, not deprive us of thy company."

And they wept afresh. I said to them: "I wish that you would acquaint me

with the cause of this weeping." "Thou," they replied, "art the cause;

yet now, if thou wilt attend to what we tell thee, we shall never be

parted; but if thou act contrary to it, we are separated from this time;

and our hearts whisper to us that thou wilt not regard our warning."

"Inform me," said I, "and I will attend to your directions." And they

replied: "If then thou wouldst inquire respecting our history, know that

we are the daughters of kings: for many years it hath been our custom to

assemble here, and every year we absent ourselves during a period of

forty days; then returning, we indulge ourselves for a year in feasting

and drinking. This is our usual practice; and now we fear that thou wilt

disregard our directions when we are absent from thee. We deliver to

thee the keys of the palace, which are a hundred in number, belonging to

a hundred closets. Open each of these, and amuse thyself, and eat and

drink, and refresh thyself, excepting the closet that hath a door of red

gold; for if thou open this, the consequence will be a separation

between us and thee. We conjure thee, therefore, to observe our

direction, and to be patient during this period." Upon hearing this, I

swore to them that I would never open the closet to which they alluded;

and they departed, urging me to be faithful to my promise.

 

I remained alone in the palace, and at the approach of evening I opened

the first closet, and, entering it, found a mansion like paradise, with

a garden containing green trees loaded with ripe fruits, abounding with

singing birds, and watered by copious streams. My heart was soothed by

the sight, and I wandered among the trees, scenting the fragrance of the

flowers, and listening to the warbling of the birds as they sang the

praises of the One, the Almighty. After admiring the mingled colours of

the apple resembling the hue upon the cheek of the beloved maid and the

sallow countenance of the perplexed and timid lover, the sweet-smelling

quince diffusing an odour like musk and ambergris, and the plum shining

as the ruby, I retired from this place, and, having locked the door,

opened that of the next closet, within which I beheld a spacious tract

planted with numerous palm-trees, and watered by a river flowing among

rose-trees, and jasmine, and marjoram, and eglantine, and narcissus, and

gilliflower, the odours of which, diffused in every direction by the

wind, inspired me with the utmost delight. I locked again the door of

the second closet, and opened that of the third. Within this I found a

large saloon, paved with marbles of various colours, and with costly

minerals and precious gems, and containing cages constructed of sandal

and aloes-wood with singing birds within them, and others upon the

branches of trees which were planted there. My heart was charmed, my

trouble was dissipated, and I slept there until the morning. I then

opened the door of the fourth closet, and within this door I found a

great building in which were forty closets with open doors; and entering

these, I beheld pearls, and rubies, and chrysolites, and emeralds, and

other precious jewels such as the tongue cannot describe. I was

astonished at the sight, and said: "Such things as these, I imagine, are

not found in the treasury of any king. I am now the King of my age, and

all these treasures, through the goodness of God, are mine."

 

[illustration]

 

_At the approach of evening I opened the first closet and, entering it,

found a mansion like paradise._

 

Thus I continued to amuse myself, passing from one place to another,

until thirty-nine days had elapsed, and I had opened the doors of all

the closets excepting that which they had forbidden me to open. My heart

was then disturbed by curiosity respecting this hundredth closet, and

the Devil, in order to plunge me into misery, induced me to open it. I

had not patience to abstain, though there remained of the appointed

period only one day: so I approached the closet, and opened the door;

and when I had entered, I perceived a fragrant odour, such as I had

never before smelt, which intoxicated me so that I fell down insensible,

and remained some time in this state: but at length recovering, I

fortified my heart, and proceeded. I found the floor overspread with

saffron, and the place illuminated by golden lamps and by candles, which

diffused the odours of musk and ambergris. I saw also a black horse, of

the hue of the darkest night, before which was a manger of white crystal

filled with cleansed sesame, and another, similar to it, containing

rose-water infused with musk: he was saddled and bridled, and his saddle

was of red gold. Wondering at the sight of him, I said within myself:

"This must be an animal of extraordinary qualities;" and, seduced by the

Devil, I led him out, and mounted him; but he moved not from his place.

I kicked him with my heel; but still he moved not: so I took a switch

and struck him with it; and as soon as he felt the blow he uttered a

sound like thunder, and, expanding a pair of wings, soared with me to an

immense height through the air, and then alighted upon the roof of

another palace, where he threw me from his back, and, by a violent blow

with his tail upon my face, struck out my eye, and left me.

 

Thus it was I became blind of one eye. I then recollected the

predictions of the ten young men. The horse again took wing, and soon

disappeared. I got up much vexed at the misfortune I had brought upon

myself. I walked upon the terrace, covering my eye with one of my hands,

for it pained me exceedingly, and then descended, and entered into a

hall. I soon discovered by the ten benches in a circle, and the eleventh

in the middle, smaller than the rest, that I was in the castle whence I

had been carried by the roc.

 

The ten young men were not in the hall when I entered; but came in soon

after, attended by the sheikh. They seemed not at all surprised to see

me, nor at the loss of my eye; but said: "We are sorry that we cannot

congratulate you on your return, as we could wish; but we are not the

cause of your misfortune." "I should do you wrong," I replied, "to lay

it to your charge; I have only myself to accuse." "If," said they, "it

be a subject of consolation to the afflicted to know that others share

their sufferings, you have in us this alleviation of your misfortune.

All that has happened to you we have also endured; we each of us tasted

the same pleasures during a year; and we had still continued to enjoy

them, had we not opened the golden door, when the princesses were

absent. You have been no wiser than we, and have incurred the same

punishment. We would gladly receive you into our company, to join with

us in the penance to which we are bound, and the duration of which we

know not. But we have already stated to you the reasons that render this

impossible: depart, therefore, and proceed to the court of Bagdad, where

you will meet with the person who is to decide your destiny." After they

had explained to me the road I was to travel, I departed from them, with

mournful heart and weeping eye, and, God having decreed me a safe

journey hither, I arrived at Bagdad, after I had shaved my beard, and

become a mendicant. Praise be to God, whose name be exalted, and whose

purposes concerning me are as yet hid in darkness.

you're good....

The Institute of Development Management (IDM) was established in 1974 as a regional organisation in Botswana, Lesotho and Swaziland (BLS) countries to help meet the management needs of the Region through management development activities including training, consultancy, research, and the establishment of a Management Resource Centre.

The specific objectives of IDM are:

* to improve the managerial knowledge and skills of persons charged with senior responsibilities for development in the public, parastatal and private sectors;

* to provide management training and consultancy to middle and senior level personnel in the public, parastatal and private sectors;

* to improve organisational structures, administrative and management procedures and development policies related to social and economic needs;

* to improve the data base available for decision making with respect to development;

* to extend public awareness of, and encourage, public involvement in all aspects of development.

IDM Management

The Institute is an autonomous institution and operates under the general direction of a Governing Board composed of representatives from government, industry and universities in each of the BLS countries. The Board meets regularly in member countries on a rotational basis to discuss matters pertaining to management training programmes, staff development, finances, relations with donor agencies and other policy matters.

Administratively, it is headed by a Regional Director who is the Chief Executive. Each country has a campus headed by a Country Director. The Regional Office of IDM is located in Gaborone, Botswana.

Professional Staff

IDM has a full-time faculty of thirty-eight staff members covering a wide variety of areas of specialisation. The full-time faculty operates in all three countries conducting management development and training needs assessment, designing and conducting management courses and carrying out consultancies for clients in the public, parastatal and private sectors. In addition to the full-time faculty, the Institute has Associate Consultants in each country whose services are used to provide expertise whenever necessary.

Hay guise! My name is Weed and I like, TOTALLY have a boyfriend and stuff. He calls me and EVERYTHING! He looks really cute from the pix I saw of him on teh internets, and my BFF Jill thinks so too! What do u guys think?

ohmylol

Thousands of years ago, before the dawn of man as we knew him... there was Sir Santa of Claus: an ape-like creature making crude and pointless toys out of dino-bones and his own waste, hurling them at chimp-like creatures with crinkled hands regardless of how they behaved the previous year. These so-called "toys" were buried as witches and defecated upon and hurled at predators who were awoken by the searing grunts of children. It wasn't a holly jolly Christmas that year; for many were killed!

The ice had made the globe inhabitable. Santa Ape did not know where the North Pole was. How could he? He was born before science existed. So he carved and placed his workshop right here. Long before they unionized, and Christmas was celebrated at each full moon, in front of the great red ape!

wtf is this shit.

Sneaksta you made me lol! genius! :D

Fucking lol Sneaky.

Hi, weed, fuck off.

*bows*

"Thank you... and good night."

Nigger is a noun in the English language, most notable as a pejorative term and common ethnic slur for black people, and also as an informal slang term, among other contexts.

The word originated as a term used in a neutral context to refer to black people, as a variation of the Spanish/Portuguese noun negro, a descendant of the Latin adjective niger, meaning "black".[1][2][3][4] Although criticized for its pejorative meaning since the 1800s, the term remained in general use in much of the world until around the 1960s - 1970s. It retains a place in popular culture and slang; however, it is widely considered to be grossly offensive in mainstream English usage.

Etymology and history

Main article: Negro

Earlier variants (such as neger or negar) derive from the Spanish/Portuguese word negro, meaning "black", and probably also the French nègre, which has also been used pejoratively (but also positively as in Négritude), derived from negro (the ordinary French word for "black" being noir). Both negro and noir (and therefore also nègre and nigger) ultimately come from nigrum, the accusative form of the Latin word niger (pronounced [ˈniger], like "knee-ger" with the final r being trilled), simply meaning "black".

In Colonial America, negars was used in 1619 by John Rolfe, describing slaves shipped to Virginia colony.[5] Neger (sometimes spelled "neggar") also prevailed in northern New York under the Dutch and also in Philadelphia, in its Moravian and Pennsylvania Dutch communities. For example, the African Burial Ground in New York City was originally known as "Begraafplaats van de Neger" (Dutch phrase meaning "Cemetery of the negro" in English).

In the United States the word nigger was not always considered derogatory,[citation needed] but was instead used by many as merely denotative of black skin, as it was in other parts of the English-speaking world. In nineteenth-century literature, there are many uses of the word nigger with no intended negative connotation. Charles Dickens, and Joseph Conrad (who published The Nigger of the 'Narcissus' in 1897) used the word without racist intent. Mark Twain often put the word into the mouths of his characters, white and black, but did not use the word when writing as himself in his autobiographical Life on the Mississippi.

In the United Kingdom and other parts of the English-speaking world, the word was often used to refer to darker skinned peoples colonized by the British Empire, or merely to darker-skinned foreigners in general; in his 1926 Modern English Usage, H. W. Fowler observed that when the word was applied to "others than full or partial negroes," it was "felt as an insult by the person described, & betrays in the speaker, if not deliberate insolence, at least a very arrogant inhumanity." The note was excised from later editions of the book.

In the 1800s, as "nigger" began to acquire pejorative connotations, the term "colored" gained popularity as an alternative to "negro" and associated terms. For example, abolitionists in Boston, Massachusetts posted warnings to "Colored People of Boston and vicinity." The name of the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People reflects the preference for this term at the time of the NAACP's founding in 1909.

Southern dialect in many parts of the southern United States changes the pronunciation of "Negro" to "nigra" (used most famously by Lyndon B. Johnson, a proponent of civil rights during the later portion of his political career). In the early editions of his dictionary, Noah Webster suggested the new spelling of neger for "Negro".[6]

Black became the preferred term in English in the late 1960s, and this continues to the present day. In the United States this has been displaced to some extent by African American, at least in politically correct usage, though this blanket term does not accurately describe those from other African nations such as Morocco; this resembles the term Afro-American that was in vogue in the early 1970s. Nevertheless, black continues in widespread use as a racial designation in the United States and is rarely regarded as offensive.

Today the word is often spelled nigga or niggah, in imitation of the manner in which some pronounce it. (Less-common variants are nigguh or even nikuh.) Other variations, designed to avoid the term itself, include nookah, reggin, nukka, nagger and the much older "jigger."[citation needed]

Usage

In the United Kingdom

In the United Kingdom, "nigger" is now established as a derogatory word, but as recently as the 1950s it was widely regarded as acceptable in Britain for black people to be referred to as niggers (indeed, liquorice confectionery "cigarettes" were at that time sold to children bearing the brand name "Nigger Boy"[citation needed]). By the 1970s, these and other terms had become recognised as offensive racial slurs had been outlawed by stricter government legislation.

Historically, British people would often describe a dark shade of brown as "nigger brown". Though this and all other uses of the word "nigger" have long since been considered offensive in Britain, the color term has turned up as recently as 2007, having been placed on a Chinese-made sofa label. [7]

The author Rudyard Kipling often used the word "nigger" without derogatory intent in his stories, as narrator and in speeches by characters. One usage (spelled "naygur" to represent the speakers's Irish accent) referred to a native of India.

The singer Elvis Costello used the word in his contemporary "state of the world today" song "Oliver's Army" in 1979. In the second verse, about the Berlin Wall - he sang "All it takes is one itchy trigger - One more widow, one less white nigger," referring to those killed by the East German troops for trying to leave East Germany by circumventing the wall. On a later edition of the programme Stars in Their Eyes a contestant sang this song and was forced by the producers to substitute this line as "One more widow, one less white figure."

John Lennon used the word in his song "Woman Is the Nigger of the World."

Big Brother 2007 contestant Emily Parr was ejected from the Big Brother house only hours after saying the word "Nigger" in reference to a fellow housemate. Despite making the slur in jest, she was removed due to tighter rules in response to a previous similar situation causing public outcry.

In the United States

In the United States, the word was freely used by most whites and some blacks until the Civil Rights Movement of the 1960s.[citation needed]

In the first half of the 20th Century, before Major League Baseball was integrated, ball players with a dark complexion were sometimes nicknamed "Nig."[8][9] The following major league players bore the nickname: Johnny Beazley (1941–49), Howard Berry (1921–22), Bobby Bragan (1940–48), Nig Clarke (1905–20), Nig Cuppy (1892–1901), Nig Fuller (1902), Johnny Grabowski (1923– 31), Nig Lipscomb (1937), Charlie Niebergall (1921–24), Nig Perrine (1907), and Frank Smith (1904–15). Other nicknames include the word hidden in the anagram "Ginger".

Louisiana Governor Earl Long also used the term when advocating expanded voting rights for African Americans. At that time, the term was less noteworthy than the expressions of support by white Southerners, as it was a common regional term for blacks, along with negro and colored.

Today, the implied racism of the term is so strong that the use of nigger in most situations is a social taboo. Many American magazines and newspapers will not even print the word in full, instead using "n*gg*r", "n*ger", "n——", or "the N-word."[citation needed]

A Washington Post article on Strom Thurmond's 1948 candidacy for President of the United States went so far as to replace it with the periphrasis "the less-refined word for black people."

The shock effect of the word can also be used to deliberately cause offense. Several historians and activists, such as Dick Gregory, have said the use of "N-word" instead of nigger robs younger generations of the full history of black people in America.

The term nigger has sometimes been extended in meaning so as to refer to all disadvantaged people. For example, Ron Dellums, an American politician, once said that "it's time for somebody to lead all of America's niggers".[10] In 1978 musical artist Patti Smith employed the word in a similar context in her song Rock N Roll Nigger.

The New York City Council passed a resolution on February 28, 2007 that symbolically bans the use of the word nigger. There are no penalties for non-compliance. The resolution also asks that songs including the word nigger in their lyrics be excluded from consideration for the Grammy Awards.[11][12]

The reason for the lack of penalties in the New York resolution is that any attempt to impose a penalty for pure speech, not accompanied by any clear or present danger, would violate the First Amendment of the United States Constitution, to which the States have been subject since the decision in Gitlow v. New York. Merely because a group of persons finds a particular word or expression offensive does not provide the government with any authority to ban it. For example, a Vietnam-era era draft protestor was held, in the case of Cohen v. California, to have a constitutional right to wear a jacket into the Los Angeles County Courthouse that bore the words "fuck the draft."

Boxer Muhammed Ali famously said in an interview regarding his refusal to enlist during the Vietnam War, 'I ain't going to fight in Vietnam, no Vietnamese ever called me a nigger'.

Concerning its use among African-Americans, Cornel West says "There's a certain rhythmic seduction to the word. If you speak in a sentence and you have to say 'cat,' 'companion,' or 'friend' as opposed to 'nigger,' then the rhythmic presentation is off. That rhythmic language is a form of historical memory for black people... When Richard Pryor came back from Africa and decided to stop using the word onstage, he would sometimes start to slip up because he was so used to speaking that way. It was the right word at the moment to keep the rhythm together in his sentence making." [13]

In Australia

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In Australia, though the word's meaning is generally understood, it is now rarely used by urban whites in any context; when referring to indigenous Australians, the casual terms Abo and the more derogatory boong or coon are used in its place. Nigger is sometimes used amongst working class Australians, when used in a casual sense between friends or work colleagues of both white and mixed race. It is generally used in imitation of American slang e.g. "Wassup, my nigger." It should be emphasised that the word nigger has far less shock value in Australia than the US and is often used in a typical Australian ironic context, without meaning to, or indeed causing offence. Black, Aboriginal, or Polynesian people may use the term to greet each other. It would not be acceptable to use the term to a stranger or casual acquaintance.

However, nigger has seen common use in rural or semi-frontier districts. In this context, the usage was British colonial, that is, applying generically to dark-skinned people of any origin (cf. Rudyard Kipling). This has led to controversy, since Australian Aborigines have started to take the term strongly to heart, in both the pejorative and revisionist senses (see below under Names of places and things). Most Australians would have never identified Aborigines as "niggers" though, believing it to be a specific reference to African Americans and American usage, rather than Australian.

Other languages

In various Romance languages, including the Spanish and Portuguese dialects used in Latin American and parts of Africa, a variety of words cognate with the Latin niger and sounding similar to the English word nigger are used without the disparaging connotation the word holds in English; in fact, of the two most common Portuguese words for "black" — negro and preto —, the latter is considered to be the (potentially) offensive one when referring to ethnicity. (Note that, contrary to "nigger", both Portuguese words can simply refer to the color black, either as adjective or as noun, for example the river Rio Negro = "Black River".) The French cognate nègre, however, commonly used during the colonial period, is similarly considered offensive, whereas noir (literally, "black") is the standard word, with the Anglicism black being a common slang term.

Forms ultimately derived from Latin niger have been borrowed into various non-Romance languages, and may be used to refer to people without negative connotation; The Hungarian néger referred to black Africans without any negative connotations until the 1990s when its meaning changed under English influence.[citation needed] In Latvian, "nēģeris" is still referred to black Africans without any derogatory meaning. The word nigger, typically with the same spelling and more or less similar pronunciation, also appears as a loanword in languages other than English and has the same racist connotations as the English word. In Nazi propaganda, the German compound niggerjazz was used as a derogatory term for jazz music, which Nazi ideology held was a degenerate form of music. In Yiddish, "shvartzer", meaning 'black' is considered offensive while "neger" is the standard word.

Literary uses

Nigger has a long history of controversy in literature. Carl Van Vechten, a white photographer and writer famous as a supporter of the Harlem Renaissance, provoked debate and some protest from the African American community by titling his 1926 novel Nigger Heaven. The controversy centered on the use of the word in the title and fueled the sales of the hit novel. Of the controversy, Langston Hughes wrote:

“ No book could possibly be as bad as Nigger Heaven has been painted. And no book has ever been better advertised by those who wished to damn it. Because it was declared obscene, everybody wanted to read it, and I'll venture to say that more Negroes bought it than ever purchased a book by a Negro author. Then, as now, the use of the word "nigger" by a white was a flashpoint for debates about the relationship between Black culture and its White patrons. ”

The famous controversy over Mark Twain's novel Adventures of Huckleberry Finn (1885), a classic frequently taught in American schools, revolves largely around the novel's 215 uses of the word, often referring to Jim, Huck's raft mate.[14][15] Advocates of the book point out that use of the word is not intended to spread racist stereotypes but simply reflects the situation at the time of writing, and that Jim is clearly depicted as a sympathetic character.

Slaves often pandered to racist assumptions by using the word nigger to their advantage in the self-deprecatory artifice of Tomming.[16] Implicit was an unspoken reminder that a presumably inferior person or subhuman could not reasonably be held responsible for work performed incorrectly, a fire in the kitchen, or any similar offense. It was a means of deflecting responsibility in the hope of escaping the wrath of an overseer or master. Its use as a self-referential term was also a way to avoid suspicion and put whites at ease. A slave who referred to himself or another black as a "nigger" presumably accepted his subordinate role and posed no threat to white authority.

Original title of And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie

Bram Stoker, the Irish author best known for Dracula, makes use of the word 46 times in his 1911 novel, The Lair of the White Worm. Edgar Caswall's African servant, Oolanga, is often referred to as a "nigger" throughout the book.[17]

Agatha Christie's novel And Then There Were None, also known as Ten Little Indians, originally appeared as Ten Little Niggers. Other examples of literary usage in the United Kingdom during the late 19th and early 20th centuries suggest a more neutral usage of the term, which can cause a problem when reading such books today when the word has such an offensive meaning. The Gilbert and Sullivan operetta The Mikado uses the word nigger twice. The executioner Ko-ko, in his song "I have a little list", sings of executing "the nigger serenader and the others of his race" (Gilbert meant white performers performing minstrel songs in blackface, a popular Victorian entertainment). The Mikado, in his song “Let the Punishment fit the Crime”, sings of having overly-made-up society ladies “Blacked like a nigger/With permanent walnut juice”. Both lyrics are frequently changed in contemporary performances.[18]

The Reverend W. V. Awdry's story Henry's Sneeze (part of The Railway Series of stories that is most known for Thomas the Tank Engine) originally described some soot-covered boys as being "as black as niggers". After complaints were made in 1972, the description was changed to "as black as soot".

War Comes to Willy Freeman by James Collier and Christopher Collier (ISBN 0-440-49504-0) mentions the word nigger nineteen times. Current readers complain as this use of the word is unnecessary and, in the 18th century context of the story, is not historically correct.[citation needed]

Rudyard Kipling's Just So Story "How the Leopard Got His Spots" tells of how an Ethiopian and a leopard, who are originally sand-colored, decide to paint themselves for camouflage when hunting in dense tropical forest. The story originally included a scene in which the leopard, who now has spots, asks the Ethiopian why he doesn't want spots as well. The Ethiopian's original reply, "Oh, plain black's best for a nigger", has been changed in many modern editions to read, "Oh, plain black's best for me."

Rudyard Kipling uses the word in his "A Counting-Out Song", from Land and Sea Tales for Scouts and Guides, (1923). The rhyme reads "Eenie Meenie Mainee, Mo! Catch a nigger by the toe!"

In Graham Greene's short story "The Basement Room" (1935) , the (sympathetic) character Baines tells a boy who admires him of his time at a British colony in Africa: "You wouldn't believe it now, but I've had forty niggers under me, doing what I told them to". To the boy's question "Did you ever shoot a nigger?" Bains answers "I never had any call to shoot. Of course I carried a gun. But you didn't need to treat them bad, that just made them stupid. Why, I loved some of those dammed niggers. I couldn't help loving them". In the 1948 film "The Fallen Idol", which was based on the story, the word was avoided and replaced with "natives" (in the film version, however, Baines did on one occasion shoot and kill a rebellious "native").

Usage in popular culture

At one time, the word nigger was used freely in branding and packaging of products in the United States and United Kingdom. Such brands included Nigger Hair Tobacco and Niggerhead Oysters (and other canned foods). Brazil nuts were sometimes called "nigger toes". As times changed, so did labeling practices. The tobacco brand became "Bigger Hare" and the canned goods brand became "Negro Head". Eventually, such names disappeared from the Western products altogether.[19][20] The term nigger remains common in China as a descriptor of a dark shade of brown. In 2007, a black household in Canada bought a chocolate-brown leather sofa manufactured in China, and the label listed the item's color as "Nigger Brown."[21] The China-based Nanhai De Xing Leather Shoes Habiliment Co., Ltd.'s online store describes a leather men's boot as "nigger-brown."[22]

The word nigger has appeared in many films (such as in Blazing Saddles, which used the term to ridicule racism), television shows and songs. The word was also used in all stage productions of the musical Show Boat from 1927 until 1946. It is part of the original lyric to the famous song Ol' Man River, as well as of Cotton Blossom, the show's opening chorus. It was not used in any of the film versions of the show, but it was included in the 1988 EMI recording of the complete original score, featuring its original lyrics, orchestrations, and vocal arrangements. Musical theatre historian Miles Kreuger and conductor John McGlinn have both argued that the word was not intended as an insult, but rather as a blunt illustration of how whites at that time perceived blacks.

In a comedy sketch on Saturday Night Live, Chevy Chase and Richard Pryor direct the words "nigger" and "honky" towards one another during a word-association interview. Many comedians such as Pryor, Redd Foxx, Eddie Murphy and Lenny Bruce used it as a regular part of their comedy routines, and often in public settings. Bruce, in one of his live albums, used the word repeatedly to a black audience member so many times, that the man, angry at first, then laughed and understood Bruce's usage; to ridicule the racism attached to the word and to disempower it. Along with them, rap groups such as N.W.A. (Niggaz with Attitudes), re-popularized the usage in their lyrics. Nowadays, it's common by comedians such as Eddie Griffin or rappers such as DMX, but at that time, it was still uncommon practice in pop culture. Some episodes of Sanford & Son had to be edited and went unaired because Foxx used the word so much during taping. On an episode of Mad TV, during a sketch called "Real Mother****ing Talk" (hosted by Aries Spears), Michael McDonald says "nigger please" in the presence of other African-Americans such as Xzibit.

Country music artist David Allan Coe has used racially charged words in his song lyrics such as redneck, white trash and nigger. (e.g. the songs "Cowboys & Niggers", "If That Ain't Country, I'll Kiss Your Ass" and "Nigger Fucker").[23]

Michael Richards used the word nigger against a heckler during his stand-up comedy routine.[24]

Dog the Bounty Hunter used the word in reference to his son's girlfriend.[25]

In Season 2, episode 20 of Family Matters, The word "nigger" was written on Laura Winslow's school locker. She also found a note inside her locker saying "If you want to learn Black History, Go back to Africa."

Recent controversies

In April 2007, a dark brown leather sofa set sold by Vanaik Furniture and Mattress Store in Toronto, Canada carried a tag that described its colour as "Nigger-brown." The discovery of the label immediately provoked outrage across Canada and the United States. It was eventually determined that the furniture manufacturer in China had used an outdated version of Kingsoft's Chinese-English translation software to produce the tags; when the Chinese characters for "Dark-brown" were entered, the offensive term was produced. Neither the Canadian supplier or furniture store had noticed the tags during shipping. Kingsoft subsequently updated its software to avoid similar incidents.[26][27][28][29]

Derived usage

* In the past, nigger was sometimes used as a synonym for "defect", deriving from the phrase "nigger in the woodpile", which originally referred to escaping slaves hiding among woodpiles being transported on trains. It came to mean some unseen problem.[30] For example, the May 1886 issue of Scientific American, page 308 said, "The consequence of neglect might be that what the workmen call ‘a nigger’ would get into the armature, and burn it so as to destroy its service."

* The term nigger was used in lumber mills until the mid-point of the 20th century. It refers to a device that turns a log while it is being stripped of its bark. This may be an off-hand reference to the prejudicial use of the word, as until the machine was invented, this was considered a job too dangerous for anyone other than a black man.[citation needed]

* The British term for a black iron marine bollard, made from an old cannon partially buried muzzle upward with a slightly oversize black cannonball covering the hole, was "niggerhead". Sailors also once called an isolated coral head a niggerhead. The latter are notorious as navigation hazards.

* Many varieties of flora and fauna commonly are still referred to by terms which include the word. The nigger-head cactus, Echinocactus polycephalus, which is native to Arizona, is round, the size of a cabbage, and covered with large, crooked thorns. The colloquial name for echinacea, or coneflower, is, variously, "Kansas niggerhead" or "wild niggerhead". The "niggerhead termite" (Nasutitermes graveolus)[31] is native to Australia.

* Around the world, the names of several varieties of foods do, or did, include the words. Brazil nuts are often referred to as "nigger toes". An Irish colloquialism described prunes as "nigger's knackers". A popular chocolate snack in Belgium is widely known as Negerinnetetten (negress's tits), however it is sold under the trademark Melo-cakes. Another chocolate treat in Holland was until recently called Negerzoenen (Negro kisses), but is now called Buys Zoenen (Buys Kisses) after the vendor's name. In Sweden, the traditional treat Negerbollar (Negro balls) is now more commonly referred to as Chocolate-, Oat- or Coco-balls.

* In 1960, a stand at the stadium in Toowoomba, Australia, was named the "E. S. 'Nigger' Brown Stand" in honor of the 1920s rugby player Edward Stanley Brown. Brown, a white Australian, was given the nickname early in his life by his brothers because his skin was so white. Brown was known by this nickname all his life; his headstone is engraved with the word "nigger".

Stephen Hagan, a lecturer at the Kumbari/Ngurpai Lag Higher Education Center of the University of Southern Queensland took the Toowoomba council to court over the use of the word, lost at the district and state level, and the High Court ruled that the matter was beyond federal jurisdiction. Local Aboriginals generally did not share Hagan's stance. Hagan went to the United Nations and won a recommendation that federal Australian authorities press the Queensland government to remove the word; the federal government responded by citing the High Court jurisdiction ruling.

The stand was demolished in September 2008, and Queensland Sports Minister Judy Spence, whose department is funding the upgrade, said the use of "Nigger" would be unacceptable, either for the stand or on any commemorative plaque.

Hagan's book, The N Word: One Man's Stand (Magabala Books, 2005, ISBN 978-1875641987), covers this episode. He is also writing a doctoral dissertation titled The Origin, Maintenance, and Legitimization of the Word 'Nigger' in the Australian Vernacular. Hagan has reignited his efforts against the brand name of Coon cheese.[32][33]

* General John Pershing is remembered by the nickname "Black Jack", which was coined by World War I reporters who could not print his actual nickname, "Nigger Jack".[34]

* The term "sand nigger" is an ethnic slur against Arabs, while the term "timber nigger" is an ethnic slur against Native Americans.[35]

* Nigger lover is an offensive term initially applied to abolitionists. Later it was applied to any white people who sympathize or associate with African Americans.[36]

* Nigger rich is sometimes today taken to be synonymous with nouveau riche (spending ostentatiously) but originally and still means spending recklessly and as quickly as possible. Such spending is a sound economic strategy for anyone at risk of losing what is spent to pillage or robbery; at least the memories cannot be robbed. "Subject to wanton pillage" is a fair description of the economic life of blacks for much of their American history, and hence practice of nigger rich is rational. However, the economic concept is applicable to any powerless group and in this sense need not be pejorative nor even refer to blacks.[citation needed]

Names of places

Because the word was used freely for many years, there are many official place-names containing the word nigger. Examples include Nigger Bill Canyon, Nigger Hollow, and Niggertown Marsh. In 1967, the United States Board on Geographic Names changed the word nigger to Negro in 143 specific place names, although this did not always eradicate common use of the word in reference to such places.

One specific example is that of Nigger Head Mountain, located just outside of Burnet, Texas. For decades, a particular hillock was referred to as such due to the forestation at the peak resembling a black man's hairstyle of the times. It became a popular spot for the predominantly white local high school students to show their spirit by holding pep rallies and post-game parties, and even during the start of the Civil Rights Movement news services continued to refer to the hillock as "Nigger Head" with almost no reported complaints from either side of the rights struggle. In 1966, First Lady Lady Bird Johnson, as part of her beautification efforts at the time, denounced the name and asked both the U.S. Board on Geographic Names and the U.S. Forest Service to take immediate steps to change the name to something more acceptable to reflect changing views. The name was officially changed to "Colored Mountain" in 1968, and while both maps and road signs were replaced with ones bearing the new name, local inhabitants still refer to the location by its original name. There was also a "Dead Nigger Creek" in central Texas that changed its name to "Dead Negro Creek".

"Nigger Nate Grade" in Temecula, California was named after former slave and early settler Nate Harrison, but was changed in 1955 due to a request by the NAACP and renamed to Nate Harrison Grade.[37] Many other place names in California use the word as well.[38][39][40][41]

The Pacific Northwest region of the US has many uses of the word.[42][43][44][45] Near Penticton, British Columbia, a prominent summit just west of the city used to be called Niggertoe Mountain but was renamed Mount Nkwala.

A point on the Lower Mississippi River was known well into the middle and late twentieth century as Free Nigger Point, or Freenigger Point. A later variation was Free Negro Point, but the location, in West Baton Rouge Parish, is now known as Wilkinson Point.[46]

A jagged rock formation resembling a silhouetted human face protruding from a cliff over highway 421 north of Pennington Gap, Virginia was called "Nigger Head Rock" until the 1970s, when the name was changed to "Great Stone Face." Checks issued by a local bank in the 1940s bore an illustration of the rock accompanied by the original name.

Avoiding offense

This section overlaps with other sections too much. It should be combined with the rest of the article.

Please improve this article if you can.

"The N-word"

The euphemism "the N-word" became a part of the American lexicon during the racially polarizing trial of O.J. Simpson, a retired football player charged with — and ultimately acquitted of — a widely publicized double murder. One of the prosecution's key witnesses was Los Angeles police detective Mark Fuhrman, who initially denied using racial slurs but whose prolific and derogatory use of it on a tape recording brought his credibility into question. The recordings were from a session in 1985 that Fuhrman had with Laura McKinney, an aspiring screenwriter working on a screenplay about women in the police force. According to Fuhrman, he was using the word as part of his "bad-cop" persona.

Members of the press reporting on and discussing Fuhrman's testimony began using the term "the N-word" instead of repeating the actual word, presumably as a way to avoid offending audiences and advertisers.

Near-homophones

The word niger is Latin for "black" and occurs in many Latin scientific terms and names. (See Niger for other meanings such as the country in Africa.) Niger is the root for some English words which are near homophones of nigger. Some sellers of niger seed, a small black seed commonly used as wild bird feed, have begun to sell it under the name Nyjer seed, in part to avoid the common mispronunciation. Also, the Classical Latin pronunciation /ˈnigeɾ/ is close to the English /ˈnɪ.gə(ɹ)/. The situation is not the same with Church Latin pronunciation, /ˈnidʒeɾ/. It occurs in some biological and anatomical names, for example Hyoscamus niger.

Nigra, which is the way Negro is pronounced by some people in the American South, was considered by some[citation needed] to be a more polite way to refer to a black person. Also nigra is a Latin feminine form of niger = "black" and occurs in some biological and anatomical names, for example substantia nigra.

The words "niggardly" ("miserly") and "snigger" ("to laugh derisively") do not refer either to black people or to characteristics or behavior attributed to black people, nor do they have any etymological connection with the word. "Niggard" (a miserly person) is related to Old Norse nig, "stingy," and the verb "niggle" is most likely derived from the Old Norse verb nigla — "to chew, gnaw, or potter at". As such words are easily mistaken for "nigger," their use is frowned upon by some and sometimes seen as offensive. David Howard, a white city official in Washington, D.C., resigned from his job in January 1999, when he used niggardly in a fiscal sense while talking with black colleagues, who took offense at his use of the word. After reviewing the incident, Washington mayor Anthony Williams offered Howard his job back. Howard declined that position but accepted another position in the mayor's administration.[47]

The word wigger is a portmanteau combining the words white and nigger generally used to describe a young, white individual who adopts certain aspects of hip hop, thug, or gangster culture.

A colloquialism in the British music industry for a freeloader is the word "ligger" (one who seeks to attend concerts and music industry events without paying). The word derives from another colloquialism lig (a gig or event) and variations thereof "to go ligging" (to go to a series of events.)

Many chat rooms and forums have the word "nigger" censored with replacement characters. "ni99er" and "NI66ER" are sometimes used to circumvent these measures.

Usage in The Dam Busters

"Nigger" was the name of a Black Labrador[48] belonging to the RAF Second World War hero Wing Commander Guy Gibson, and appears in The Dam Busters. In 1999, British television network ITV broadcast a censored version of the film, with all utterances of "Nigger" removed. ITV blamed regional broadcaster London Weekend Television, which in turn alleged that a junior staff member had been responsible for the unauthorised cuts. When ITV again showed a censored version in June 2001, it was criticised by Index on Censorship as "unnecessary and ridiculous" and that the edits introduced continuity errors.[49]

Nigga

Main article: Nigga

The word nigga as variant of nigger has been used self-referentially by many in the African American community, often as a pronoun to refer to a black man[50]. With the rise in popularity of rap and hip-hop, the term has become more widely used among some black youth and among some non-blacks as well. This revisionist usage, particularly among non-blacks, has been the source of controversy.[citation needed]

See also

* Controversies about the word "niggardly"

* Cultural appropriation

* Discrimination

* Kaffir (ethnic slur)

* List of ethnic group names used as insults

* List of ethnic slurs

* List of topics related to Black and African people

* Niggas vs. Black People

* Profanity

* Racism

* Reappropriation

* Taboo

* Wigger

* With Apologies to Jesse Jackson, an episode of an animated comedy series, South Park, where a character becomes a social pariah after saying "niggers" on Wheel of Fortune

jb7

i'm ridin on a dolphin

doin' flips n shit

the dolphins splashin'

gettn errybody all wet

FUCK LAND I'M ON A JIZZ IN MY CUPCAKES

jb7

hey essines i had a lesbian bring me some grey goose tonight - i thought of you and wished i could give you some shots

V3

  Atop said:

  my usernames always really suck said:

THE STORY OF PRINCE AGIB

 

 

I was a king, and the son of a king; and when my father died, I

succeeded to his throne, and governed my subjects with justice and

beneficence. I took pleasure in sea-voyages; and my capital was on the

shore of an extensive sea, interspersed with fortified and garrisoned

islands, which I desired, for my amusement, to visit; I therefore

embarked with a fleet of ten ships, and took with me provisions

sufficient for a whole month. I proceeded twenty days, after which there

arose against us a contrary wind; but at daybreak it ceased, and the sea

became calm, and we arrived at an island, where we landed, and cooked

some provisions and ate; after which we remained there two days. We then

continued our voyage; and when twenty days more had passed, we found

ourselves in strange waters, unknown to the captain, and desired the

watch to look out from the mast head: so he went aloft, and when he had

come down he said to the captain: "I saw, on my right hand, fish

floating upon the surface of the water; and looking toward the midst of

the sea, I perceived something looming in the distance, sometimes black,

and sometimes white."

 

When the captain heard this report of the watch, he threw his turban on

the deck, and plucked his beard, and said to those who were with him:

"Receive warning of our destruction, which will befall all of us: not

one will escape!" So saying, he began to weep; and all of us in like

manner bewailed our lot. I desired him to inform us of that which the

watch had seen. "O my lord," he replied, "know that we have wandered

from our course since the commencement of the contrary wind that was

followed in the morning by a calm, in consequence of which we remained

stationary two days: from that period we have deviated from our course

for twenty-one days, and we have no wind to carry us back from the fate

which awaits us after this day. To-morrow we shall arrive at a mountain

of black stone, called loadstone: the current is now bearing us

violently toward it, and the ships will fall in pieces, and every nail

in them will fly to the mountain, and adhere to it; for God hath given

to the loadstone a secret property by virtue of which everything of iron

is attracted toward it. On that mountain is such a quantity of iron as

no one knoweth but God, whose name be exalted; for from times of old

great numbers of ships have been destroyed by the influence of that

mountain. There is, upon the summit of the mountain, a cupola of brass

supported by ten columns, and upon the top of this is a horseman upon a

horse of brass, having in his hand a brazen spear, and upon his breast

suspended a tablet of lead, upon which are engraved mysterious names and

talismans: and as long, O King, as this horseman remains upon the horse,

so long will every ship that approaches be destroyed, with every person

on board, and all the iron contained in it will cleave to the mountain:

no one will be safe until the horseman shall have fallen from the

horse." The captain then wept bitterly; and we felt assured that our

destruction was inevitable, and every one of us bade adieu to his

friend.

 

On the following morning we drew near to the mountain; the current

carried us toward it with violence, and when the ships were almost close

to it, they fell asunder, and all the nails, and everything else that

was of iron, flew from them toward the loadstone. It was near the close

of day when the ships fell in pieces. Some of us were drowned, and some

escaped; but the greater number were drowned, and of those who saved

their lives none know what became of the others, so stupefied were they

by the waves and the boisterous wind. As for myself, God, whose name be

exalted, spared me on account of the trouble and torment and affliction

that He had predestined to befall me. I placed myself upon a plank, and

the wind and waves cast it upon the mountain; and when I had landed, I

found a practicable way to the summit, resembling steps cut in the rock:

so I exclaimed: "In the name of God!" and offered up a prayer, and

attempted the ascent, holding fast by the notches; and presently God

stilled the wind, so that I arrived in safety at the summit. Rejoicing

greatly in my escape, I immediately entered the cupola, and performed

prayers in gratitude to God for my preservation; after which I slept

beneath the cupola, and heard a voice saying to me: "O son of Khasib,

when thou awakest, dig beneath thy feet, and thou wilt find a bow of

brass, and three arrows of lead, whereon are engraved talismans: then

take the bow and arrows and shoot at the horseman that is upon the top

of the cupola, and relieve mankind from this great affliction; for when

thou hast shot at the horseman he will fall into the sea; the bow will

also fall, and do thou bury it in its place; and as soon as thou hast

done this, the sea will swell and rise until it attains the summit of

the mountain; and there will appear upon it a boat bearing a man,

different from him whom thou shalt have cast down, and he will come to

thee, having an oar in his hand: then do thou embark with him; but utter

not the name of God; and he will convey thee in ten days to a safe sea,

where, on thy arrival, thou wilt find one who will take thee to thy

city. All this shall be done if thou utter not the name of God."

 

Awaking from my sleep, I sprang up, and did as the voice had directed. I

shot at the horseman, and he fell into the sea; and the bow having

fallen from my hand, I buried it: the sea then became troubled, and rose

to the summit of the mountain, and when I had stood waiting there a

little while, I beheld a boat in the midst of the sea, approaching me. I

praised God, whose name be exalted, and when the boat came to me, I

found in it a man of brass, with a tablet of lead upon his breast,

engraven with names and talismans. Without uttering a word, I embarked

in the boat, and the man rowed me ten successive days, after which I

beheld the islands of security, whereupon, in the excess of my joy, I

exclaimed: "There is no deity but God! God is most great!"--and as soon

as I had done this, the man cast me out of the boat, and sank in the

sea.

 

Being able to swim, I swam until night, when my arms and shoulders were

tired, and, in this perilous situation, I repeated the profession of the

faith, and gave myself up as lost; but the sea rose with the violence of

the wind, and a wave like a vast castle threw me upon the land, in order

to the accomplishment of the purpose of God. I ascended the shore, and

after I had wrung out my clothes, and spread them upon the ground to

dry, I slept; and in the morning I put on my clothes again, and, looking

about to see which way I should go, I found a tract covered with trees;

and when I had walked round it, I found that I was upon a small island

in the midst of the sea; upon which I said within myself: "Every time

that I escape from one calamity I fall into another that is worse:" but

while I was reflecting upon my unfortunate case, and wishing for death,

I beheld a vessel bearing a number of men. I arose immediately, and

climbed into a tree; and lo, the vessel came to the shore, and there

landed from it ten black slaves bearing axes. They proceeded to the

middle of the island, and, digging up the earth, uncovered and lifted up

a trap-door, after which they returned to the vessel, and brought from

it bread and flour, and clarified butter and honey, and sheep and

everything that the wants of an inhabitant would require, continuing to

pass backward and forward between the vessel and the trap-door, bringing

loads from the former, and entering the latter, until they had removed

all the stores from the ship. They then came out of the vessel with

various clothes of the most beautiful description, and in the midst of

them was an old sheikh, enfeebled and wasted by extreme age, leading by

the hand a young man cast in the mould of graceful symmetry, and

invested with such perfect beauty as deserved to be a subject for

proverbs. He was like a fresh and slender twig, enchanting and

captivating every heart by his elegant form. The party proceeded to the

trap-door, and, entering it, became concealed from my eyes.

 

They remained beneath about two hours, or more; after which, the sheikh

and the slaves came out; but the youth came not with them; and they

replaced the earth, and embarked and set sail. Soon after, I descended

from the tree, and went to the excavation. I removed the earth, and,

entering the aperture, saw a flight of wooden steps, which I descended;

and, at the bottom, I beheld a handsome dwelling-place, furnished with a

variety of silken carpets; and there was the youth, sitting upon a high

mattress, with sweet-smelling flowers and fruits placed before him. On

seeing me, his countenance became pale; but I saluted him, and said:

"Let thy mind be composed, O my master: thou hast nothing to fear; for I

am a man, and the son of a king, like thyself: fate hath impelled me to

thee, that I may cheer thee in thy solitude." The youth, when he heard

me thus address him, and was convinced that I was one of his own

species, rejoiced exceedingly at my arrival, his colour returned, and,

desiring me to approach him, he said: "O my brother, my story is

wonderful: my father is a jeweller; he had slaves who made voyages

by his orders, for the purposes of commerce, and he had dealings with

kings; but he had never been blest with a son; and he dreamt that he was

soon to have a son, but one whose life would be short; and he awoke

sorrowful. Shortly after, in accordance with the decrees of God, my

mother gave birth to me; and my father was greatly rejoiced: the

astrologers, however, came to him, and said: Thy son will live fifteen

years: his fate is intimated by the fact that there is in the sea a

mountain called the Mountain of Loadstone, whereon is a horseman on a

horse of brass, on the former of which is a tablet of lead suspended to

his neck; and when the horseman shall be thrown down from his horse, thy

son will be slain: the person who is to slay him is he who will throw

down the horseman, and his name is King Agib, the son of King Khasib. My

father was greatly afflicted at this announcement; and when he had

reared me until I had nearly attained the age of fifteen years, the

astrologers came again, and informed him that the horseman had fallen

into the sea, and that it had been thrown down by King Agib, the son of

King Khasib; on hearing which, he prepared for me this dwelling, and

here left me to remain until the completion of the term, of which there

now remain ten days. All this he did from fear lest King Agib should

kill me."

 

[illustration]

 

_And when the boat came to me I found in it a man of brass, with a

tablet of lead upon his breast, engraven with names and talismans._

 

When I heard this, I was filled with wonder, and said within myself: "I

am King Agib, the son of King Khasib, and it was I who threw down the

horseman; but, by Allah, I will neither kill him nor do him any injury."

Then said I to the youth: "Far from thee be both destruction and harm,

if it be the will of God: thou hast nothing to fear: I will remain with

thee to serve thee, and will go forth with thee to thy father, and beg

of him to send me back to my country, for the which he will obtain a

reward." The youth rejoiced at my words, and I sat and conversed with

him until night, when I spread his bed for him, and covered him, and

slept near to his side. And in the morning I brought him water, and he

washed his face, and said to me: "May God requite thee for me with every

blessing. If I escape from King Agib, I will make my father reward thee

with abundant favours." "Never," I replied, "may the day arrive that

would bring thee misfortune!" I then placed before him some

refreshments, and after we had eaten together, we passed the day

conversing with the utmost cheerfulness.

 

I continued to serve him for nine days; and on the tenth day the youth

rejoiced at finding himself in safety, and said to me: "O my brother, I

wish that thou wouldst in thy kindness warm for me some water, that I

may wash myself and change my clothes; for I have smelt the odour of

escape from death, in consequence of thy assistance." "With pleasure," I

replied; and I arose, and warmed the water; after which, he entered a

place concealed from my view, and, having washed himself and changed his

clothes, laid himself upon the mattress to rest after his bath. He then

said to me: "Cut up for me, O my brother, a water-melon, and mix its

juice with some sugar:" so I arose, and, taking a melon, brought it upon

a plate, and said to him; "Knowest thou, O my master, where is the

knife?" "See, here it is," he answered, "upon the shelf over my head." I

sprang up hastily, and took it from its sheath, and as I was drawing

back, my foot slipped, as God had decreed, and I fell upon the youth,

grasping in my hand the knife, which entered his body, and he died

instantly. When I perceived that he was dead, and that I had killed him,

I uttered a loud shriek, and beat my face, and rent my clothes: saying:

"This is, indeed, a calamity! O my Lord, I implore thy pardon, and

declare to Thee my innocence of his death! Would that I had died before

him!"

 

With these reflections I ascended the steps, and, having replaced the

trap-door, returned to my first station, and looked over the sea, where

I saw the vessel that had come before, approaching, and cleaving the

waves in its rapid course. Upon this I said within myself: "Now will the

men come forth from the vessel, and find the youth slain, and they will

slay me also:" so I climbed into a tree, and concealed myself among its

leaves, and sat there till the vessel arrived and cast anchor, when the

slaves landed with the old sheikh, the father of the youth, and went to

the place, and removed the earth. They were surprised at finding it

moist, and, when they had descended the steps, they discovered the youth

lying on his back, exhibiting a face beaming with beauty, though dead,

and clad in white and clean clothing, with the knife remaining in his

body. They all wept at the sight, and the father fell down in a swoon,

which lasted so long that the slaves thought he was dead. At length,

however, he recovered, and came out with the slaves, who had wrapped the

body of the youth in his clothes. They then took back all that was in

the subterranean dwelling to the vessel, and departed.

 

I remained, by day hiding myself in a tree, and at night walking about

the open part of the island. Thus I continued for the space of two

months; and I perceived that, on the western side of the island, the

water of the sea every day retired, until, after three months, the land

that had been beneath it became dry. Rejoicing at this, and feeling

confident now in my escape, I traversed this dry tract, and arrived at

an expanse of sand; whereupon I emboldened myself, and crossed it. I

then saw in the distance an appearance of fire, and, advancing toward

it, found it to be a palace, overlaid with plates of red copper, which,

reflecting the rays of the sun, seemed from a distance to be fire: and

when I drew near to it, reflecting upon this sight, there approached me

an old sheikh, accompanied by ten young men who were all blind of one

eye, at which I was extremely surprised. As soon as they saw me, they

saluted me, and asked me my story, which I related to them from first to

last; and they were filled with wonder. They then conducted me into the

palace, where I saw ten benches, upon each of which was a mattress

covered with a blue stuff; and each of the young men seated himself upon

one of these benches, while the sheikh took his place upon a smaller

one; after which they said to me: "Sit down, O young man, and ask no

question respecting our condition, nor respecting our being blind of one

eye." Then the sheikh arose, and brought to each of them some food, and

the same to me also; and next he brought to each of us some wine: and

after we had eaten, we sat drinking together until the time for sleep,

when the young men said to the sheikh: "Bring to us our accustomed

supply"--upon which the sheikh arose, and entered a closet, from which

he brought, upon his head, ten covered trays. Placing these upon the

floor, he lighted ten candles, and stuck one of them upon each tray;

and, having done this, he removed the covers, and there appeared beneath

them ashes mixed with pounded charcoal. The young men then tucked up

their sleeves above the elbow, and blackened their faces, and slapped

their cheeks, exclaiming: "We were reposing at our ease, and our

impertinent curiosity suffered us not to remain so!" Thus they did until

the morning, when the sheikh brought them some hot water, and they

washed their faces, and put on other clothes.

 

On witnessing this conduct, my reason was confounded, my heart was so

troubled that I forgot my own misfortunes, and I asked them the cause of

their strange behaviour; upon which they looked toward me, and said: "O

young man, ask not respecting that which doth not concern thee; but be

silent; for in silence is security from error." I remained with them a

whole month, during which, every night they did the same, and at length

I said to them: "I conjure you by Allah to remove this disquiet from my

mind, and to inform me of the cause of your acting in this manner, and

of your exclaiming; 'We were reposing at our ease, and our impertinent

curiosity suffered us not to remain so!' if ye inform me not, I will

leave you, and go my way." On hearing these words, they replied: "We

have not concealed this affair from thee but in our concern for thy

welfare, lest thou shouldst become like us, and the same affliction that

hath befallen us happen also to thee." I said, however: "Ye must

positively inform me of this matter." "We give thee good advice," said

they, "and do thou receive it, and ask us not respecting our case;

otherwise thou wilt become blind of one eye, like us"--but I still

persisted in my request; whereupon they said: "O young man, if this

befall thee, know that thou wilt be banished from our company." They

then all arose, and, taking a ram, slaughtered and skinned it, and said

to me: "Take this knife with thee, and introduce thyself into the skin

of the ram, and we will sew thee up in it, and go away; whereupon a bird

called the roc will come to thee, and, taking thee up by its talons,

will fly away with thee, and set thee down upon a mountain: then cut

open the skin with this knife, and get out, and the bird will fly away.

Thou must arise, as soon as it hath gone, and journey for half a day,

and thou wilt see before thee a lofty palace, encased with red gold, set

with various precious stones such as emeralds and rubies; and if thou

enter it thy case will be as ours; for our entrance into that palace was

the cause of our being blind of one eye; and if one of us would relate

to thee all that hath befallen him, his story would be too long for thee

to hear."

 

They then sewed me up in the skin, and entered their palace; and soon

after, there came an enormous white bird, which seized me, and flew away

with me, and set me down upon the mountain; whereupon I cut open the

skin, and got out; and the bird, as soon as it saw me, flew away. I rose

up quickly, and proceeded toward the palace, which I found to be as they

had described it to me; and when I had entered it, I beheld, at the

upper end of a saloon, forty young damsels, beautiful as so many moons,

and magnificently attired, who, as soon as they saw me, exclaimed:

"Welcome! Welcome! O our master and our lord! We have been for a month

expecting thee. Praise be to God who hath blessed us with one who is

worthy of us, and one of whom we are worthy!" After having thus greeted

me, they seated me upon a mattress, and said; "Thou art from this day

our master and prince, and we are thy handmaids, and entirely under thy

authority." They then brought to me some refreshments, and, when I had

eaten and drunk, they sat and conversed with me, full of joy and

happiness. So lovely were these ladies, that even a devotee, if he saw

them, would gladly consent to be their servant, and to comply with all

that they would desire. At the approach of night they all assembled

around me, and placed before me a table of fresh and dried fruits, with

other delicacies that the tongue cannot describe, and wine; and one

began to sing, while another played upon the lute. The wine-cups

circulated among us, and joy overcame me to such a degree as to

obliterate from my mind every earthly care, and make me exclaim: "This

is indeed a delightful life!" I passed a night of such enjoyment as I

had never before experienced; and on the morrow I entered the bath; and,

after I had washed myself, they brought me a suit of the richest

clothing, and we again sat down to a repast.

 

In this manner I lived with them a whole year; but on the first day of

the new year, they seated themselves around me, and began to weep, and

bade me farewell, clinging to my skirts. "What calamity hath befallen

you?" said I. "Ye are breaking my heart." They answered: "Would that we

had never known thee; for we have associated with many men, but have

seen none like thee. May God, therefore, not deprive us of thy company."

And they wept afresh. I said to them: "I wish that you would acquaint me

with the cause of this weeping." "Thou," they replied, "art the cause;

yet now, if thou wilt attend to what we tell thee, we shall never be

parted; but if thou act contrary to it, we are separated from this time;

and our hearts whisper to us that thou wilt not regard our warning."

"Inform me," said I, "and I will attend to your directions." And they

replied: "If then thou wouldst inquire respecting our history, know that

we are the daughters of kings: for many years it hath been our custom to

assemble here, and every year we absent ourselves during a period of

forty days; then returning, we indulge ourselves for a year in feasting

and drinking. This is our usual practice; and now we fear that thou wilt

disregard our directions when we are absent from thee. We deliver to

thee the keys of the palace, which are a hundred in number, belonging to

a hundred closets. Open each of these, and amuse thyself, and eat and

drink, and refresh thyself, excepting the closet that hath a door of red

gold; for if thou open this, the consequence will be a separation

between us and thee. We conjure thee, therefore, to observe our

direction, and to be patient during this period." Upon hearing this, I

swore to them that I would never open the closet to which they alluded;

and they departed, urging me to be faithful to my promise.

 

I remained alone in the palace, and at the approach of evening I opened

the first closet, and, entering it, found a mansion like paradise, with

a garden containing green trees loaded with ripe fruits, abounding with

singing birds, and watered by copious streams. My heart was soothed by

the sight, and I wandered among the trees, scenting the fragrance of the

flowers, and listening to the warbling of the birds as they sang the

praises of the One, the Almighty. After admiring the mingled colours of

the apple resembling the hue upon the cheek of the beloved maid and the

sallow countenance of the perplexed and timid lover, the sweet-smelling

quince diffusing an odour like musk and ambergris, and the plum shining

as the ruby, I retired from this place, and, having locked the door,

opened that of the next closet, within which I beheld a spacious tract

planted with numerous palm-trees, and watered by a river flowing among

rose-trees, and jasmine, and marjoram, and eglantine, and narcissus, and

gilliflower, the odours of which, diffused in every direction by the

wind, inspired me with the utmost delight. I locked again the door of

the second closet, and opened that of the third. Within this I found a

large saloon, paved with marbles of various colours, and with costly

minerals and precious gems, and containing cages constructed of sandal

and aloes-wood with singing birds within them, and others upon the

branches of trees which were planted there. My heart was charmed, my

trouble was dissipated, and I slept there until the morning. I then

opened the door of the fourth closet, and within this door I found a

great building in which were forty closets with open doors; and entering

these, I beheld pearls, and rubies, and chrysolites, and emeralds, and

other precious jewels such as the tongue cannot describe. I was

astonished at the sight, and said: "Such things as these, I imagine, are

not found in the treasury of any king. I am now the King of my age, and

all these treasures, through the goodness of God, are mine."

 

[illustration]

 

_At the approach of evening I opened the first closet and, entering it,

found a mansion like paradise._

 

Thus I continued to amuse myself, passing from one place to another,

until thirty-nine days had elapsed, and I had opened the doors of all

the closets excepting that which they had forbidden me to open. My heart

was then disturbed by curiosity respecting this hundredth closet, and

the Devil, in order to plunge me into misery, induced me to open it. I

had not patience to abstain, though there remained of the appointed

period only one day: so I approached the closet, and opened the door;

and when I had entered, I perceived a fragrant odour, such as I had

never before smelt, which intoxicated me so that I fell down insensible,

and remained some time in this state: but at length recovering, I

fortified my heart, and proceeded. I found the floor overspread with

saffron, and the place illuminated by golden lamps and by candles, which

diffused the odours of musk and ambergris. I saw also a black horse, of

the hue of the darkest night, before which was a manger of white crystal

filled with cleansed sesame, and another, similar to it, containing

rose-water infused with musk: he was saddled and bridled, and his saddle

was of red gold. Wondering at the sight of him, I said within myself:

"This must be an animal of extraordinary qualities;" and, seduced by the

Devil, I led him out, and mounted him; but he moved not from his place.

I kicked him with my heel; but still he moved not: so I took a switch

and struck him with it; and as soon as he felt the blow he uttered a

sound like thunder, and, expanding a pair of wings, soared with me to an

immense height through the air, and then alighted upon the roof of

another palace, where he threw me from his back, and, by a violent blow

with his tail upon my face, struck out my eye, and left me.

 

Thus it was I became blind of one eye. I then recollected the

predictions of the ten young men. The horse again took wing, and soon

disappeared. I got up much vexed at the misfortune I had brought upon

myself. I walked upon the terrace, covering my eye with one of my hands,

for it pained me exceedingly, and then descended, and entered into a

hall. I soon discovered by the ten benches in a circle, and the eleventh

in the middle, smaller than the rest, that I was in the castle whence I

had been carried by the roc.

 

The ten young men were not in the hall when I entered; but came in soon

after, attended by the sheikh. They seemed not at all surprised to see

me, nor at the loss of my eye; but said: "We are sorry that we cannot

congratulate you on your return, as we could wish; but we are not the

cause of your misfortune." "I should do you wrong," I replied, "to lay

it to your charge; I have only myself to accuse." "If," said they, "it

be a subject of consolation to the afflicted to know that others share

their sufferings, you have in us this alleviation of your misfortune.

All that has happened to you we have also endured; we each of us tasted

the same pleasures during a year; and we had still continued to enjoy

them, had we not opened the golden door, when the princesses were

absent. You have been no wiser than we, and have incurred the same

punishment. We would gladly receive you into our company, to join with

us in the penance to which we are bound, and the duration of which we

know not. But we have already stated to you the reasons that render this

impossible: depart, therefore, and proceed to the court of Bagdad, where

you will meet with the person who is to decide your destiny." After they

had explained to me the road I was to travel, I departed from them, with

mournful heart and weeping eye, and, God having decreed me a safe

journey hither, I arrived at Bagdad, after I had shaved my beard, and

become a mendicant. Praise be to God, whose name be exalted, and whose

purposes concerning me are as yet hid in darkness.

 

 

you're good....

I didn't write that.

I did come up with that theory Einstein stole credit for, the one with light and energy and mass.

I usually buy 12 beers.

But if you're a girl 9 beers is probably enough.

real men drink 100 beer

Drinking lots of beer will make you fat, I'd watch out!

  Dan C said:

Drinking lots of beer will make you fat, I'd watch out!

I have noticed this.That's why I don't drink much beer anymore, to maintain my slim figure.

  my usernames always really suck said:

I didn't write that.

 

I did come up with that theory Einstein stole credit for, the one with light and energy and mass.

I meant for finding that.

I didn't write any of the stuff I posted either...

A gay black dude I used to work with did.

He wanted me to illustrate it.

Said no.

wrong thread.