999,898 posts

Guess what it was??? it was a piece of crispy bacon, which I dropped last Christmas. I thought the dog ate it, but I guess it didnt. There were many things over there where I always looked for things, but I didn't like them, so I don't know why I was always looking for them. But this thing I did like. And this thing, it liked me right back in the face.

But I don't like things that like me. They smell funny. So I made it friends with it, seduced it, then strangled it in the night and ate it's flesh. The bacon wasn't happy with this, and laughed itself to sleep. But then in the plane, he needed to go pee, so I laughed myself to sleep as he pissed himself to wake. He was definitely awake when the plane started to fall. He was definitely going to fall with the plane, and he was definitely going to get lost again. And lost he did get. Lost in the eternal sea of human sadness, lyrically beautiful without the physical countenance to outweigh it's inherent irony. And that was where he found himself, lost in an abysmal abyss... That was where he found himself.

He was taken to new levels of excitement, when he found himself. Oh what a day.... Oh ...what a day. But this was to be expected, because he was not just random. He was ranDom with a capital D. But anyway, who cares about the bacon, this story is about me.

Me and my eternal instructions of destruction from underneath. Me and my inherent understanding of the ways of the universe.

Me and my happiness.

Me and my sadness.

Me, and my bacon.

THE END

999,956

  KY said:

whatever

ok going to bed later.

I am going to stay up and wait for this even though I know it will be uneventful.

  karmakramer said:

YAHHHOOOOOOOO!!!!!

The person with the millionth post should win moderator privileges.

i truly am a bad person.

999,981

999,983

999,985

I'll try to get a screen grab.

bullshit post!11

AHHHHHH!

tities?

also balls

999992

Are we cheating by posting completely irrelevant pictures and random sentences?

bll