I want to be a serial killer

FIRST you must have an inspiring nickname, and THEN you must live up to it, just let your imagination run free

The Fluteload Fecalist

The Fencepost Fellatist

The Widdershins Kneecapper

The 303 Skinscraper

The Holy-Shit-Why-Did-He-Slice-Off-Her-Skin-And-Threw-Her-In-A-Vat-Of-Salt-While-She-Was-Still-Alive-I-Mean-That-Is Unnecesarry-And-Totally-Fucked-Up-I-Am-Going-To-Vomit Killer

i think you should become a master of quiet forced entry . . sneak into your victim's kitchens. . then when people awake they find an Arthurian dagger right through their weetabix. BAM!

you could also draw Emeril Lagasse caricatures on their fridges, for terror.

  On 7/3/2010 at 9:56 PM, Yegg said:

You should install two quarter inch jacks in your victims heart, lungs, stomach, intestines, bladder, throat, and body cavity but one for their urethra, and anus. Then you should use lengths of transparent tubing as patch cables and route poo and piss signals through the different modules of their body.

This.

10/10 thread thus far.

  On 7/3/2010 at 10:20 PM, triachus said:

 

The Fencepost Fellatist

 

Fucking lol.

xxx seems to have covered most things, but you're going to have to move to America to fully succeed in not being caught I think, because you can travel so far, and buy enough to land to carry out your duties and disposal.

We are all going to jail if he really turns out to be a serial killer by the way.

We are called accomplices.

Well I am pretty sure we are, after giving him advice, I'd say that comes under "help".

not only that, but the thread will be indexed in google and will end up being the first result for "how to be a serial killer" which will be an important resource and motivation for countless murderers!!!

what have you done!!!!

oh shit

your modus operandi could be to cut off girls vaginas and them sew them all together into a hot air balloon so you can escape to the planet mars

  On 7/4/2010 at 12:50 AM, Funktion said:

your modus operandi could be to cut off girls vaginas and them sew them all together into a hot air balloon so you can escape to the planet mars

Jesus LMAO

I googled "I want to be a serial killer" as I am interested to see how far down the watmm seach comes. Well I get a couple of helpful pages Kaen so I'd give that a go.

  On 7/4/2010 at 1:02 AM, xxx said:

lol, if someone actually consulted Google with the strict search "how to be a serial killer", well, it's their own fault when that door comes busting down hahaha!

 

I've seen almost every episode of a really fascinating show called "Forensic Files" and I've seen plenty of ep's where internet searches became relevant. People can be so "thick" about it too:

 

po-po: Sir, we found your wife at the bottom of a cattle pond and we have some evidence linking you to the scene

perp: Preposterous! *crocodile sobs* oh my precious Doris! How on Earth could you think I could do such a thing?

po-po: we have a warrant to search your laptop *opens cache* *finds Google search: "how to hide the dead body of a wife named Doris at the bottom of a cattle pond"*

po-po:

perp at sentencing:

so they just find that shit in the cache? incognito mode, dawg.

or do they actually subpoena ISPs and shit?

honestly i've thought about this many times before, i think hunting humans could be incredibly fun, seeing the fear in their eyes, but then killing them would be a waste

i don't want to cause pain

but if they made a video game with incredibly realistic environments and physics and tons of methods and all kinds of incredible amounts of realistic details i would play it

  On 7/4/2010 at 12:41 AM, abusivegeorge said:

oh shit

It always makes me wonder if fear could kill, you know, like die of shock? Have a heart attack or something, and I mean anyone by the way, take the strongest, fittest people. Scare them so much, do you think that could kill?

One for xxx probably.

Then again I think maybe not, I mean you don't hear of parents dying of shock after hearing about the loss of their child or anything.

Meh, I dunno.

if you can die from a broken heart then why not fear?

from what i understand if you get scared enough (like a strange dark supernatural experience or whatever) all kinds of strange things can happen.

you can turn white - your hair can turn white or fall out - you can literally never be the same again - totally and completely batshit insane and yes you can even die

  On 7/4/2010 at 3:16 AM, troon said:

if you can die from a broken heart then why not fear?

 

from what i understand if you get scared enough (like a strange dark supernatural experience or whatever) all kinds of strange things can happen.

you can turn white - your hair can turn white or fall out - you can literally never be the same again - totally and completely batshit insane and yes you can even die

Wow that's some freaky shit. It's just made all those horror movies a load of bollocks though :(.

lol

yea the nervous system is no fool'in around - got's to take care of that shit or you'll end up like one of those flipped out basket case house wives - smoking cigs with

chewing gum in her hair - clothed in a thigh high satin magenta teddy - washing dishes with a toothbrush

Lol!

You're posting has changed troon, you don't punctuate yourself in a non linear fashion anymore, nor do you word your sentences the same, may I ask why?

I think Josie in Twin Peaks died from fear. Then inexplicably, her soul ended up in a dresser :/

  On 7/4/2010 at 6:52 AM, xxx said:

  On 7/4/2010 at 1:42 AM, abusivegeorge said:

It always makes me wonder if fear could kill, you know, like die of shock? Have a heart attack or something, and I mean anyone by the way, take the strongest, fittest people. Scare them so much, do you think that could kill?

 

One for xxx probably.

 

Then again I think maybe not, I mean you don't hear of parents dying of shock after hearing about the loss of their child or anything.

 

Meh, I dunno.

You can never say never in the world of pathophysiology. Remember the poor chap who attended a dubstep night and suffered sudden cardiac arrest and could not be revived? There ya go The immense flood of norepinephrine and cortisol from the sensation of such intense fear could have easily matched or exceeded that intense bass pressha so someone like that kid could've gone out via extreme fear. The right situation just never presented itself.

 

Now, since medicine is a science, it's based on data and trends and one would have to concede that the chances are extremely low of that happening. But that's not to say you would come out unscathed. Rat studies have demonstrated that permanent and detrimental neuronal changes have occurred in rats whose brains had constant exposures to the "chemicals of stress" (I imagine it as quite a cruel study--hundreds of graduate students donning Halloween masks and terrorizing cage after cage of rats on the daily )

 

So, you could definitely say that the experience put such a "notch on your bedpost" that you can expect to live less/have lower quality of life/be more prone to disease. This is what we're seeing in the unfortunate PTSD cases coming back from the deserts :(

 

Cheerz dude, that makes perfect sense. So now if I ever get kidnapped and tortured I probably live through it. Which is a shame coz the chances of that happening are quite high.

LOL at your students donning halloween masks comment.

  On 7/4/2010 at 4:03 AM, abusivegeorge said:

Lol!

 

You're posting has changed troon, you don't punctuate yourself in a non linear fashion anymore, nor do you word your sentences the same, may I ask why?

just having a bit of fun on the intranets

one can't be serious without end - now and again its well time for a bit of mucking about - however this dose not

changed who i am - i adhere to the same eternal moral code that has been written within my heart