What Would You Do?

you could always just set the house on fire !

Probably offer to call him a taxi. If he had no money maybe even pay for it if I was feeling mighty generous.

Do you have the sort of relationship with your wife where you can stand up to her at all?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovp2MByMa7c&feature=related

squirt her with cream.

Nah she really is lovely woman. Its just that in her mind when I tell her there's an old guy sitting in our drive she immediately pictures a dirty old bum and worries. When a woman has a strange old man lurking outside their house they tend to think the worst and I can't say I blame them. I blame the TV for making us believe that the average stranger would rape and eat us given half the chance.

  On 7/2/2011 at 6:35 PM, Fraxinus said:

When a woman has a strange old man lurking outside their house they tend to think the worst and I can't say I blame them. I blame the TV for making us believe that the average stranger would rape and eat us given half the chance.

i don't think all women feel this way, i'd give credit towards those who would act as you did (or were planning to do).

  On 7/2/2011 at 5:48 PM, uptown devil said:

squirt her with cream

yes. women want to be creamed on.

all of them.

"they just don't know it yet"

I'd make sure to hide the body very carefully

if i had a car i'd probably give him a ride.

i'd invite him in, ask him about his life, and persuade him to do a reddit AMA.

A lovely woman doesn't freak out at news that an old man is taking a breather in your lawn chair during a storm. If she was in the same position as him, I bet she would be moaning and carrying on like a twat.

You seem like a good bloke though.

Is your wife the Lockhorns?