Monogamy and alternatives

Well. I would be interested what types of romantic relationships you are in or you prefer. Especially the men here, but wait, there are only men here, right?

Anyway I'm in the situation that I've been together with a girl for a quite long time, at least for me, that would be almost three years. Of course, in this period I got to know her very well and physically there is not much surprise anymore. Although she's goddamned good in certain things you do in bed, I know how exciting it is to get to know an unknown woman and sleep with here. That feeling, there is no way, we can go back to it. That's the way it goes, I guess.

Anyway I really love this woman. Of course I do flirt with different women and look at them and stuff, but I could never imagine going further. My girlfriend noticed this and wrote me a long letter, being very afraid of loosing me and not being able to satisfy me any more In general, this is quite a difficult topic. Because: She's right on the one hand. She is standing in my way, by me knowing I would loose her, if I fuck around. That way I could learn much more than by staying at her side. But on the other hand it's a beautiful feeling, cause it shows me, how much I really love her. And how less sexual attraction has to do with love in the end.

So I would like to have a little advice and your comment on the idea of a monogamic romantic relationship, like most of us probably are heading for. Are there good alternatives without hurting the one or other person? How I can I manage to fuck around while not upsetting my girlfriend ?

Let me help you: How can your girlfriend fuck around while not upsetting you?

When you have the answer to that you will know the secret.

Alternatives?

Monogamy

Bigamy

Trigonometry

Polyamory.

Your first question:

I don't restrict myself to monogamous relationships. Usually I only have one girlfriend at a time anyways. When it comes to time management it's much less stressful. I've had two overlapping ones before. It left very little time for my own hobbies and friends, which got me depressed. Since then any additional women I've kept it just as hook ups. Usually they end up becoming friends, gig buddies or drinking buddies.

I tried astronomy once though, it was way over my head.

Your last question about alternatives that won't hurt your current relationship? I dunno man? Going by what you said it seems like she wouldn't be accepting of an open relationship if that's what you are implying.

If you want to fuck around with other women then you don't want to be in a long-term relationship.

  On 12/8/2011 at 3:07 PM, patternoverlap said:

If you want to fuck around with other women then you don't want to be in a long-term relationship.

truthbullets.

how old are you tokn? if you're like 21 or something then don't worry about anything and do whatever the hell you like... if you're 31 then maybe you're with the wrong woman.

(null)

men cheat. that's what girls think. I can't get one girl let alone multiple women. so, i don't understand this reality

Women think men cheat because a lot of them do.

you have to date a swinger. I know a swinger couple. They fuck whoever as long as they are honest about it with each other. Its like some swinger code or something. They have a kid and everything. you have to be ok with your girl fucking someone else though. The guy likes seeing his wife get fucked too. ( I think it's unhealthy, but hey. I can't get shit so what do I know)

I'm in a serious long term relationship. I've never cheated on her, but we've both "shared" on a few occasions, with another couple, 4-some style. It's great, and luckily, not weird at all.

  On 12/8/2011 at 6:21 PM, sneaksta303 said:

I'm in a serious long term relationship. I've never cheated on her, but we've both "shared" on a few occasions, with another couple, 4-some style. It's great, and luckily, not weird at all.

Did dicks touch? If they did, you're gay, son.

what if i just like, fuck his ass or something?

  On 12/8/2011 at 1:58 PM, Gocab said:

Let me help you: How can your girlfriend fuck around while not upsetting you?

 

When you have the answer to that you will know the secret.

This is a great answer.

  On 12/8/2011 at 6:33 PM, sneaksta303 said:

what if i just like, fuck his ass or something?

Not gay, only if dicks touch, or you're the catcher.

Here's the tip of a penis, and as you can see, it's bumping into a nice... side of a penis.

monogamy isn't for some people & polyamory isn't for some people. moral of the story: date someone that is in the same group as you. less drama that way.

  On 12/8/2011 at 6:53 PM, azatoth said:

  On 12/8/2011 at 6:33 PM, sneaksta303 said:

what if i just like, fuck his ass or something?

 

Not gay, only if dicks touch, or you're the catcher.

this is an interesting point. some people would only engage in homosexual behavior in the context of group sex. why is that?

I've been married 5 years and we've been going out with other women together for a couple years now. Communication is key, as is having a solid relationship, but its not entirely unheard of. In our case we get our kicks working as a team and playing off each other so its a mutually satisfactory situation.

  On 12/8/2011 at 7:02 PM, Hoodie said:

monogamy isn't for some people & polyamory isn't for some people. moral of the story: date someone that is in the same group as you. less drama that way.

Truth.

if you loose her by fucking around what's your problem?

maybe instead of writing letters to eachother try to talk to her or something. or just start masturbating more.

LOSE

gastronomy

  On 12/8/2011 at 3:07 PM, patternoverlap said:

If you want to fuck around with other women then you don't want to be in a long-term relationship.

i think for most people this applies but certain people are capable of having long-term relationships with more than 1 partner

( i am not one of them)

this is a typical penis problem.

1) understand that VERY few women will tolerate cheating and usually leave their partners when they do. Most of the very few women who do tolerate it once typically have lifelong trust issues with the spouse/significant other.

2) Before engaging in that sort of affair try to imagine your G/F having another gentleman like yourself putting his penis into her.

Do what you feel is best for you dude, but don't just listen to your penis. it really only wants one think and tends to forget/ignore potential consequences.