Bacon Essay Contest

while i learned a lot, and i thank everyone for participating in this bacon essay contest, i'm afraid only one person can win. Here are the final results

3rd Place:

2nd Place:

1st Place:

Thanks again everyone for your efforts. I now have used my allotted 10 USD budget that I had set aside early this year for WATMM Secret Santa. Cheers!

as if fred that was my prize

you can have honorable mention max

yay!!!!!!!!!!!

horseshit. I demand a recount.

Dammit I'm on my phone and spoilers don't work, I can't see results :'(

Guess I was too subtle in insinuating Bac-Os as a metaphor for Skrillex.

  On 12/23/2011 at 11:23 AM, kaen said:

Dammit I'm on my phone and spoilers don't work, I can't see results :'(

if you hit quote you can view them

  On 12/23/2011 at 12:43 PM, sweepstakes said:

Guess I was too subtle in insinuating Bac-Os as a metaphor for Skrillex.

yours was the most accurate and fact-based.

p.s. what's the deal with david cross and sriracha sauce together? those are like two of my favorite things.

  On 12/23/2011 at 11:23 AM, kaen said:

Dammit I'm on my phone and spoilers don't work, I can't see results :'(

  On 12/23/2011 at 11:23 AM, kaen said:

Dammit I'm on my phone and spoilers don't work, I can't see results :'(

3rd Place:

Spoiler

alcofibras. really spectacular absurdist bacon noir narrative. had this been a short story contest your would've been hard to beat.

2nd Place:

Spoiler

baph. your first entry was like one of the most superior madlibs ever written. bravo. the bacon descriptors were bountiful and beautiful

1st Place:

Spoiler

Taubooooooooo. "Bread Glove" is so fucking stupid and hilarious that it completely captures the spirit of this essay contest. A delightful historical essay on the origin of bacon. truly enlightening and amusing. PM with your paypal address so that I may pay you 10 USD.

Good show, everyone, and congratulations to tauboo!

These bits are pure gold

  On 12/22/2011 at 1:42 AM, tauboo said:

The last thing he scribed was an order for Stilton and in his diary, his hopes, after hearing of this new cheese, to try it with frying ham

in a bread glove but he never did.

  On 12/22/2011 at 2:07 AM, kaini said:

Most people fry bacon, but bacon bacon is even better because it makes it crispier.

  On 12/22/2011 at 2:28 AM, Backson said:

Man, this bacon, like you wouldn't believe. Cooking the bacon until perfect crispy, make the lips wet in anticipation for the bacon. Put the bacon on a burger, whatever you want! Have the bacon with some sauce, have the bacon with no sauce, forget about it.

  On 12/22/2011 at 3:50 PM, futuregirlfriend said:

PIZZA HUT

  On 12/22/2011 at 8:29 PM, Alcofribas said:

i opened the door completely, so that it was totally opened.

  On 12/22/2011 at 8:40 PM, chenGOD said:

(he always called me mister, as if to add more was to sully himself)

 

At dinner a bottle of red wine. The bacon was good and life was good.

  On 12/23/2011 at 4:36 PM, chimera slot mom said:

Good show, everyone, and congratulations to tauboo!

 

These bits are pure gold

 

  On 12/22/2011 at 1:42 AM, tauboo said:

The last thing he scribed was an order for Stilton and in his diary, his hopes, after hearing of this new cheese, to try it with frying ham

in a bread glove but he never did.

 

  On 12/22/2011 at 2:07 AM, kaini said:

Most people fry bacon, but bacon bacon is even better because it makes it crispier.

 

  On 12/22/2011 at 2:28 AM, Backson said:

Man, this bacon, like you wouldn't believe. Cooking the bacon until perfect crispy, make the lips wet in anticipation for the bacon. Put the bacon on a burger, whatever you want! Have the bacon with some sauce, have the bacon with no sauce, forget about it.

 

  On 12/22/2011 at 3:50 PM, futuregirlfriend said:

PIZZA HUT

 

  On 12/22/2011 at 8:29 PM, Alcofribas said:

i opened the door completely, so that it was totally opened.

 

  On 12/22/2011 at 8:40 PM, chenGOD said:

(he always called me mister, as if to add more was to sully himself)

 

At dinner a bottle of red wine. The bacon was good and life was good.

don't forget this line, chimera, (as well as your use of references):

  Quote

And that's why, if I win the $10, I will spend it on bacon.

that is the perfect conclusion to come to in a bacon essay contest.

Kaen- I think what Fred is trying to say is I won.

congratualations to all the winners

i'm still going to claim my prize, just need to get my paypal sorted

ill probably get this http://www.amazon.co.uk/Kuhn-Rikon-Safari-Tiger-Paring/dp/B005TGU3SY/ref=sr_1_136?s=kitchen&ie=UTF8&qid=1325295572&sr=1-136

haha, maybe not