Post your most recent ILLNESS (in detail)

I'm a diabetic and last august i managed to develop ketoacidosis. My insulin pump malfunctioned. I had been drunk the night before, so i was thinking it was a hangover. But as it progresses it fuzzes your brain function, so i kept just thinking i'd get better. I was vomiting constantly. With ketoacidosis you can't eat or drink. I'd drink a sip of water and soon after i'd vomit. I had no fluid left in me, the emergency doctor said i was dry as kindling. The worst part is you are SO FUCKING THIRSTY so you keep drinking and vomiting. every 20 minutes i would throw up. So, after 12 hours (before i called the ambulance) i fucked my throat up so bad that i couldn't eat because it hurt so bad to swallow saliva, nevermind food. when i got to the hospital i was almost delirious. I was hyper ventilating because my body was trying to vent carbonic acid. this made me panic as it felt terrifying and i breathed harder. i felt nauseous and was vomiting blood and bile. every minute felt like a year. when i was finally somewhat normalized and could finally breathe i still couldn't eat and i was starving. I was stuck in the hospital for a bout 6 days and i felt exhausted and like shit for about 2 weeks after. i couldn't think properly. When i could finally eat i gorged. it was awesome, the people in emergency were freaking out cause i was so red and hot (but couldn't sweat) and panting and moaning and it was insane. that's a really shitty description of what it was like but it was hell. no eating, drinking or sleeping and constantly feeling so uncomfortable that it sucked to lie down, sit up, walk, jump, anything. absolute hell. but ice chips have never been so fucking amazing.

also it made me decide to turn my life around a bit. that was good. oddly enough it helped me with my depression.

holy shit, essines. that's awful. how could the pump malfunction like that?? could you sue the pharmaceutical that manufactures it?

  On 6/19/2012 at 3:12 AM, baph said:

  On 6/19/2012 at 2:20 AM, Hoodie said:

i've had weird heart palpitations recently. feels like my heart wants to burp. when i listened with a stethoscope while the sensation was occurring, the rhythm seemed normal, so i might be a hypochondriac.

 

you should definitely let a doctor listen with a stethoscope just in case

my veterinarian uncle did and said it sounded fine (although he wasn't listening when i had the sensation). i don't think i want to waste my time and money to have a doctor tell me that too.

the issue was with a certain piece of the pump equipment that they could have blamed me for fucking up and which i could have fucked up (but i've yet to find a reason why). I did send the piece to the company with my story and asking them to see if there was a reason why it had happened and to make sure it wouldn't happen to any other.

oh, and the best part was that the doctor told me my potassium levels were so high i was inches away from having a heart attack. at 23. FUCK YEAH!

any permanent damage?

  On 6/16/2012 at 1:00 AM, Smettingham Rutherford IV said:

the most major one I can remember was food poisoning.

 

 

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I spent most of the night projectile vomiting, ruining my bed, many of my textbooks and my laptop. I then managed to crawl to the bathroom to shit out what looked like a pinkish sludge of diarrhea and blood. I then began to develop intense feverish symptoms, to the point where if I raised my head for more than ten seconds I would vomit. I laid my head and body onto the cold cooling tiles of the bathroom floor, praying that this was just some sort of fluke. I managed to hoist myself up for another round of projectile vomiting, luckily this time into the toilet. I then somehow (I don't even remember how I did this) managed to shit another round of pink goo into the toilet before collapsing against the side of the bathroom.

 

At this point I was hovering in and out of consciousness. I yelled for my roommate for help, to call somebody, to drive me to a hospital, anything. I received no response except for the jarring tinnitic silence of the void that was our apartment in the dead autumn heat. I suddenly felt the need to vomit again, but remembering the breathing techniques I had learned to stop vomitus when I had drank one too many, I closed my eyes and could feel nothing but the turning of my stomach, and the clammy cold sweat pouring down my face, my back now sticking to the bathroom tiles. I told myself that I could die, that I didn't have the strength to get out my door, much less drive myself to a hospital. I needed to order my body to stop destroying itself. Nothing but blackness and the gurgling of my loins....breathe in, breathe out...

 

As I start to feel some success was to be had with the urging to ralph, I suddenly felt the urge to shit again....but much worse than before. It was as if my body had diverted all the vomitus in the mouth and immediately directed it towards the only other orifice it could escape from. This had to be purged from my body at all costs, and my brain could not tell it to stop. The brief instance of panic that accompanied this feeling was just as quickly interrupted by a stream of frothy dark red vomit forcing my jaws open. My body sensed my brain's moment of weakness, and told the bile to surge forth harder and stronger than I had ever experienced. My bathroom and my own body now doused in blood red vomit, I wanted to die. I wanted to cry, how miserable a human being must be to be lying in his own putrified waste, unable to even move his wretched carcass from his filth. At this point I had envied even the weakest of the nursing home population.

 

But, yet again I knew that my body was redirecting for one more final push out of my anus. I couldn't let this happen. Again, I cannot remember the specific circumstances, but I somehow engaged in a superhuman act of defiance, not only against this debilitating sickness, but against my own dehydrated, confused, and stalling corpus. I'm not shitting all over myself. Not today. Somehow I manage to put all of my strength into my arms, and HEAVE........Goddamn Im not even out of the bathroom yet....HEAVE....As I felt my strength sap itself all the more, I simultaneously experienced the disgusting sensory privilege of having my own sick rub up against my now mostly naked body, as I squirmed and writhed in determined yet pathetic pangs of pain....HEAVE....

 

I finally made it to the side of my bed. Clambering around hopelessly in the dark, I somehow manage to knock the phone off of my bedside table. It's still charged....holy shit SR4, you might be able to get out of this yet. I vaguely remember trying to mount some sort of victory cry, but it probably came out like a confused, muted whimper, something like the victim in Guinea Pig 2 would make towards the end of her seemingly infinite series of mutilations. I manage to turn the phone on and call 911. Success! The ambulance would be on its way in minutes! But there was a catch. I had to get to the front door to open it.

 

At this point I had realized my roommate was either not in the apartment, or had drank himself into a comatose stupor. I had to make the journey over to the front of the apartment by myself. This is it, I said to myself, knowing that only the most stubborn bastards ever survive the darkest, most hellish recesses of existence because they are willing to endure despite all of it.....HEAVE......I'm almost into the kitchen...HEAVE...I'm on a Vietnam battlefield. I'm in the middle of D-Day. They've shot my legs off...but they won't get the rest of me. As I use the last of my strength to unlock the front door, I feel my bowels start to give way...the beginnings of those apocalyptic rectal spasms. I collapse as I hear the distant wailing of an ambulance siren.

 

I wake up in the hospital ER seven hours later. My mouth is thick with the taste of vomit, my mucus has the texture of gritty Jell-O, so thick it couldn't be spit out. Water. I need water. I blindly grab around, still not completely in my senses, until a nurse comes in and tells me about my journey. It has been a while, but AFAIK, I had lost an incredibly large amount of blood and water, and was in some sort of shock when they found me by my front door, half-naked, saturated in the Nicaraguan guerilla-paintstreaks of shit and bloody vomit. I had to stay in the ER for at least 24 hours while they intravenously hydrate me and try to evacuate whatever parts of the virus were left. I wasn't allowed to drink any water for another 10 hours. The nurse said from what information the paramedics learned, there was a chance that I might have died overnight.

 

Eventually they let me go home. I must have looked completely disoriented, disheveled, smelled worse than a street urchin with an impulsive masturbation disorder. As my girlfriend picked me up, she turned to me, stared at the humiliated wretch before her, and asked what had happened.

 

Not now, I said. Confused, she eventually nodded and assumed I was too tired to tell the tale. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." And she was right. Up until now, there wasn't a need to talk about it. I had lived through hell. I had cheated death.

 

How could you expect another human being to understand the struggle of which you had just undertaken and survived?

 

I wasn't in the mood for trifling, mundane storytelling. I just wanted a damn Powerade.

 

 

 

*DIsclaimer:The preceding rant is a partially dramatized version of a real event. It really did suck that bad.*

Same here, nowhere near as bad as your experience but still really bad. My stomach is quite strong which made the incident even more notable. I thought it was a 7-11 burrito that morning but I'm pretty sure in retrospect it was a pre-made hummus wrap I scarfed down at lunch (I guess I rather blame 7-11 than a local vegan resturant). Anyway went home early, felt fatigued and tried throwing up early on. Took a nap then woke up and puked up everything. Really violent vomiting that I couldn't hold back. I was sore and dizzy as hell but already felt relieved. The kicker was this was all three days before my sisters wedding. My wife and I drove up the next day and hung out at my parents house watching old Disney movies. Managed to feel fine for the ceremony, but only after a full day of being absolutely out of it. Lost ten pounds overnight. In an effort to make the whole ordeal seem less shitty I've managed to keep it mostly off.

  On 6/15/2012 at 3:47 PM, tauboo said:

i smoke, drink and eat what many consider to be an unhealthy diet. don't get any long-lasting illness though, so fuck 'em.

Others avoid drugs, eat healthy and excercise regularly and still run into problems. Aren't genes ironic bastards sometimes?

  On 6/19/2012 at 1:52 AM, aussie said:

I had colon cancer just a little over a year ago in my sigmoid colon. Luckily the surgeons removed it all. I didn't have to get chemo or radiotherapy. Just had my yearly checkup three weeks ago - which is required after something like that, and I'm happy to say that the tests were all clear. No sign of the cancer returning.

Sounds scary as hell, glad to hear that it was taken care. Hope it's smooth sailing from here on.

  On 6/19/2012 at 3:12 AM, baph said:

  On 6/19/2012 at 2:20 AM, Hoodie said:

i've had weird heart palpitations recently. feels like my heart wants to burp. when i listened with a stethoscope while the sensation was occurring, the rhythm seemed normal, so i might be a hypochondriac.

 

you should definitely let a doctor listen with a stethoscope just in case

Yeah I agree. I had a minor case of heart arrhythmia (really slow resting heart rate) when I was a young teen, caught only when I randomly passed out one morning. Besides a bunch of basic causes the doctors pinpointed I've realized recently I was a big fan of black liquorice at the time. It's known to affect the cardiovascular system and I wonder if pushed my heart to act abnormally.

  On 6/19/2012 at 4:08 AM, essines said:

I'm a diabetic and last august i managed to develop ketoacidosis. My insulin pump malfunctioned. I had been drunk the night before, so i was thinking it was a hangover. But as it progresses it fuzzes your brain function, so i kept just thinking i'd get better. I was vomiting constantly. With ketoacidosis you can't eat or drink. I'd drink a sip of water and soon after i'd vomit. I had no fluid left in me, the emergency doctor said i was dry as kindling. The worst part is you are SO FUCKING THIRSTY so you keep drinking and vomiting. every 20 minutes i would throw up. So, after 12 hours (before i called the ambulance) i fucked my throat up so bad that i couldn't eat because it hurt so bad to swallow saliva, nevermind food. when i got to the hospital i was almost delirious. I was hyper ventilating because my body was trying to vent carbonic acid. this made me panic as it felt terrifying and i breathed harder. i felt nauseous and was vomiting blood and bile. every minute felt like a year. when i was finally somewhat normalized and could finally breathe i still couldn't eat and i was starving. I was stuck in the hospital for a bout 6 days and i felt exhausted and like shit for about 2 weeks after. i couldn't think properly. When i could finally eat i gorged. it was awesome, the people in emergency were freaking out cause i was so red and hot (but couldn't sweat) and panting and moaning and it was insane. that's a really shitty description of what it was like but it was hell. no eating, drinking or sleeping and constantly feeling so uncomfortable that it sucked to lie down, sit up, walk, jump, anything. absolute hell. but ice chips have never been so fucking amazing.

 

also it made me decide to turn my life around a bit. that was good. oddly enough it helped me with my depression.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4_nB-s7TJ0&feature=related

It was back in February on my yearly snowboarding trip which this year was to Val D'sere. I was in a chalet with 12 others plus the two host who didn't stay in the same building. 3-4 days into in one of us was pretty fucking ill one day and stayed in shitting the hell out of the porcelain caverns of dispair. The next day he was a bit better but his room mate seemed to catch it but was throwing up too. Then it was my turn...

After a pretty full day we got down the mountain and had generous beers and munch as we toured the area. I was feeling a lot more knackered than usual which I thought a bit odd, but not a problem. It came to around 11pm and we were all in a bar chatting and drinking. Something then came over me which forced me to sit on my own away from the group nursing the beer I was unable to finish. I knew something wasn't right and dramatically exited without any grasp on an attempt to wish the others a good night. I had to wait for the bus in anguish but finally made it back in time to drop a fucking napalm into the bog. This went on for about an hour. Went to bed a bit deshevaled with a glass of h2o. I went into that illness dreaming stage where I thought I needed to complete a puzzle before I was allowed to sleep by some higher ruler, of some sort. This was occasionally interupted by sudden dashes back into the bathroom to relieve myself. I could go on but this continued for the next 48 hours.

The thing was, I thought I had it bad. Two people got it after me and suffered a hell of a lot more. One of them had all this on top of stomach cramps and the other kept passing out mid-vomit. By the end this bug obliterated 7 of us before we got home. It was just fucking odd how as it went on to the next victim, it got worse. Involuntary shitting is not something I am proud of from that holiday and I feel sorry for the poor bastards who had to deal with all that.

Never again, I hope.

ive pretty much never been ill, a few years back i managed to convince myself i had heart disease, but apparently that was just anxiety, caused by being convinced i had heart disease, which seems like abit of a catch 22 but there you go.