I am powerless over shit and my anus has become unmanagable

maybe take some codeine for a couple of days. that will harden your shit up.

yeah do not go for prunes, they're a laxative, durr!

also lol @ "peanut butter"

and..

  On 7/15/2012 at 7:22 AM, YO303 said:

Take shits in a freezer.

LoL

try and become "egg-bound" by eating a large quantity of boiled eggs.

Eat some really grainy granola, some hearty rye bread, some sawdust, and sack of bristly yak hair. Foolproof.

  On 7/15/2012 at 10:01 AM, Goiter Sanchez said:

Also, drinking LESS water should help in this case.

No, he'll get dehydrated if he drinks less. Need to drink more.

if only they made some sort of....plug....for butts

Your own spunk was a good start, include cork, gum, and copious amounts of rubber cement.

  On 7/15/2012 at 5:54 PM, luke viia said:

if only they made some sort of....plug....for butts

lol

• XBOX360:LOVELY SQUIRTER
  

lol

george, watmm is anxiously awaiting an update regarding your poop shoot

*burlaps away from toilet in vertical direction*

Hi George!

Eat food with lots of fiber, avoid starchy foods.

And as counterproductive as it seems, drink lots of water. The squirts dehydrates you. So you have to increase your water intake, even if it feels like you squirt most of it right back out. If you don't do this you will feel like absolute shit from being dehydrated. I'm talking terrible headaches and your body will feel sore/crampy.

I had the runs last weekend because I ate a lot of sourdough bread with garlic (italiain food whee) and the two were destroying my gut. It was probably the worst case of the runs I've experienced. I had to sort of purge my insides by drinking loads of water and being near a toilet. However, the farts that came out of me would have made Jabba the Hutt jealous. They were fucking massive and probably some of the most rank smelling farts I've ever encountered. Pretty sure the sourdough was the culprit for that.

Make sure you have the softest TP imaginable or your asshole will get raw from cleaning it. I justgave up and just showered after every major shit-attack.

George,

couch is speaking truth... Now that you've taken Imodium you need to drink even more water as it draws water out of your bowels.

drink water water water. eat anything not on this list

• Milk and milk products, such as ice cream or cheese
  
• High-fat or greasy foods, such as fried foods
  
• Very sweet foods, such as cakes and cookies
  
• Foods that have a lot of fiber, such as citrus fruits.
  

lol at the amount of contradicting advice in this thread

last time this happened to me, i had to go to a walk-in clinic and get a prescription for travelers diarrhea medicine. keep that in mind in case it gets serious.

  On 7/16/2012 at 4:31 AM, verticalhold said:

lol at the amount of contradicting advice in this thread

'Course one could always Google search the phrase "how to harden stool" and avoid a bunch of conflicting answers on a forum centered around electronic music.

  On 7/16/2012 at 5:11 AM, ambermonk said:

  On 7/16/2012 at 4:31 AM, verticalhold said:

lol at the amount of contradicting advice in this thread

 

'Course one could always Google search the phrase "how to harden stool" and avoid a bunch of conflicting answers on a forum centered around electronic music.

take idm 3x a day for a week and then consult a moderator.

  On 7/16/2012 at 5:11 AM, ambermonk said:

  On 7/16/2012 at 4:31 AM, verticalhold said:

lol at the amount of contradicting advice in this thread

 

'Course one could always Google search the phrase "how to harden stool" and avoid a bunch of conflicting answers on a forum centered around electronic music.

'Course if you paid attention to my first post you'd see that was already explained.

Well guys the update is, after my last post, I got straight into bed, I didn't wake up once needing a shit. I woke up to piss twice and there was no sharting involved. That was 12 or so hours ago, I've been up now an hour and not needed to shit once. It looks like the Immodium and cheese toasties done the job, plus copious amounts of Ribena.

  On 7/15/2012 at 6:24 PM, underscore said:

george, watmm is anxiously awaiting an update regarding your poop shoot

Now you've gone and done it!

(around 3:00 for context)

  On 7/16/2012 at 5:11 AM, ambermonk said:

  On 7/16/2012 at 4:31 AM, verticalhold said:

lol at the amount of contradicting advice in this thread

 

'Course one could always Google search the phrase "how to harden stool" and avoid a bunch of conflicting answers on a forum centered around electronic music.

  On 7/16/2012 at 5:54 PM, kaini said:

  On 7/16/2012 at 5:11 AM, ambermonk said:

  On 7/16/2012 at 4:31 AM, verticalhold said:

lol at the amount of contradicting advice in this thread

 

'Course one could always Google search the phrase "how to harden stool" and avoid a bunch of conflicting answers on a forum centered around electronic music.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qa4nEQ4A6Gc

last time I was sweating like hell over the bowl, ask me how:

  On 7/16/2012 at 8:00 AM, chenGOD said:

  On 7/15/2012 at 6:24 PM, underscore said:

george, watmm is anxiously awaiting an update regarding your poop shoot

 

Now you've gone and done it!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAZ1BSmAubU

(around 3:00 for context)

Lol! Love his live performances, titties and beer will always be my favourite!

I am feeling much better thanks guys, I ended up slightly constipated but that slid right out after downing a Powerade.