illegally downloading >SHIT<

How much would a vpn cost per month typically? Does anyone here have one, does it choke your speed?

A bit under $10. They mostly have better bandwith than you have so speed hit is minimal. Pick one that allows you to switch regions so you can avoid region locks too. You can also choose to only proxy your torrent traffic.

Or use private trackers.

You need to join a private tracker to get content from. And also kick out your flatmate, he sounds clueless and is going to get you in trouble, is he even playing all these games, i mean if you wait for a steam sale you can pick up all sorts of shit for next to nothing anyway fS.

there's a cheap, fairly popular vpn service with kids on bikes on its front page

kids on bikes wearing helmets

if it wasn't safe would those kids be wearing helmets?