Help me choose a name for my first born

Boy: John

Girl: Jennifer

Hermaphrodite: Johnifer

Premiere

Number One

Numero Uno

Primary

Favourite

First

Original and Best

Autochthon

Champion

Principal

Paramount

Essential

Supreme

Peerless

Cardinal

Dominant Lifeform

Timothy

In the Autechre interview people didn't stop asking them to name their hardware haha, totally hilarious. You could wait till the next interview and ask Aphex, Flashbulb or whoever

Tiger Fuck

Lol-ita

Nosfefartu

Keith

Bababa Bababara Anne

Joypecs

Bukakate

Hummus

Mollyester

Mohammedisafuckingpaedophile

Bearded Jamie

Sexy

Sean R.

Robert S.

Real Madrid

Schalke

Lager

Squarepusher: Ufabulum — track by track written by SquarepusherWarp: NEW —PHEX TWIN ALBUM —â€

  On 8/16/2014 at 2:39 PM, ThatSpanishGuy said:

In the Autechre interview people didn't stop asking them to name their hardware haha, totally hilarious. You could wait till the next interview and ask Aphex, Flashbulb or whoever

so much cringe.

  On 8/16/2014 at 9:54 PM, Eggs said:

 

  On 8/16/2014 at 2:39 PM, ThatSpanishGuy said:

In the Autechre interview people didn't stop asking them to name their hardware haha, totally hilarious. You could wait till the next interview and ask Aphex, Flashbulb or whoever

so much cringe.

 

cringe or not, i'm glad they named my acoustic guitar Rifdent Stroakes Squarepusher Enrico

lol

All jokes aside, congratulations mr!

Not Jack.

Being called Jack is shit, it's so popular you hear your name everywhere and all babies are called jack.

kill all jacks.

Egbert

Arthur Twosheds

Maurice

Park

Fletch

Cliff

Richard

Bork

Pump

Tarp

Fant

Wick

Dimp

Lugg

Yord

Reak

Trump

Desk

Surt

Wimy

Yasser Arafat

BCM

CONGRATULATIONS!!! What an opportunity you've given WATMM with this thread... Though I might be disappointed/impressed in you as a human for naming your child "Nosfefartu" (credit: kakapo). You gotta be a real dick to have it so when you smoke up, your brain doesn't even have time for other laughs cuz you spend the whole time cracking up and pissing your pants that you named your child Nosfefartu.

My entries!:::

Half-serious answer:

Kwai Chang Caine. When your child gets older, you have the joy of explaining to your child how he/she was named after a character in the television series Kung Fu, with emphasis on Bruce Lee's involvement in the series and whether or not Ed Spielman is a lying sack of shit. Then you say to your child- every night before bed- "This, my child..... Kwai Chang Caine. This, I leave for you, to find your own answers. ...Your own answers....... from within." And you synchronize "within" with your hand touching your child's chest, with your eyes closing slowly and rolling back into your head. Always leave the bedroom walking backwards after saying goodnight-- the last thing your child should see before sleeping is your 武术抱拳礼 (wushu baoquan li), which is that kung fu bow with right fist touching open left hand. Basically make it so your child thinks you and your misses are secret kung fu masters, and the secrets that lie within the production of the Kung Fu tv series are for your child to find, to finish the unwritten ending to the ancient family scroll.

Serious answer:

I was gonna post a list of great names (that I think are great, anyway), but really this kind of thing should be determined by the parents going on a camping trip, then tripping on shrooms with the forest giving blessing to the names you two pull from the ether. Also, due to magic, it's not rare for people to become their names-- either the meaning or the vibez of the sound (which going way back, usually have to do with the meaning). As such, an easy way out of life: name child "Billionaire At Five Weeks Old".

sup

Soda. or Seven.

male: cunt

female: phlaps

emale: yahoo

Eugene the Anti Christ

Allahuakbardinho

Tiny Wee Compson