Jokes

Who did that last one. The penis painting one?

Anyone remember Brian from Spaced.

Kinda similar to one before, but...

What's brown and rhymes with snoop?

please don't open this

  Etch said:

Who did that last one. The penis painting one?

http://www.legorobotcomics.com/

Jerusalem, round the year 26.

A group of Jews is bored. After long pointless wandering around, one of them gets an idea: "Let's stone a whore!"

Everyone's up for it. They arrive at the nearest bordel, find a whore, then drag her out to the street. As they are about to throw the stones, Jesus runs from around the corner yelling:

"Behold, miserables! The one who never sinned, throw your stone!"

This spoils the raging mood of the Jews, and as they turn their backs to walk away, an old lady slings a large stone and hits the whore in the face. Jesus turns to her and says:

"C'mon, mom!!"

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic. He went to the local technical college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he could. When the time for the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared carefully for weeks and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of 150%. Fearing an error, he called the instructor, saying, “I don't want to appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an error in the grade.” The instructor said, “During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly, which was worth 50% of the total mark.” “You put the engine back together again perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark.” After a pause, the instructor added, “I gave you an extra 50% because you did it all through the muffler, which I've never seen done in my entire career.”

That girl's ass is like a credit card machine. One swipe and I'm cashed out.

what has 48 balls and fucks grannies?

What sound does and emotionally wooden chicken make.

  Capsaicin said:

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god damn tthis is good. i think saved awhole buncho f them somewhere and.. lost them :(

do you/anyone have the rest (of the comic i quoted)?

cheerscheerscheerscheerscheerscheerscheerscheers!

Dude I dunno, but you could send a mail to that email on the comic. Post his/her site here if you get it.

thats true. i'm pretty sure someone posted them all just last year though. at least, im pretty sure it was watmm. fingers crossed it was watmm.

how do you make a cat go woof?

Last night my wife said she wanted a rape alarm,

so at 5.30 this morning I put tape over her mouth,

held her down, fucked her in the arse and

whispered: "Time to get up, Honey!"

can you rape your wife? it's a sick thing to ask but i'm just genuinely curious if you could bring a case to court

  Fred McGriff said:

can you rape your wife? it's a sick thing to ask but i'm just genuinely curious if you could bring a case to court

definitely