Guest Gary C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 I ate about 500g of stuffed pasta... and now ready to pass the stuffing. :omg: Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 what do you mean by no shit tickets? are you out of toilet paper? that is awful. one time i spent a week in south bend during the dead of winter and had to drive to burger king whenever i had to shit because the plumbing was off or frozen or whatever Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045638 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Iain C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Last year when I was a bit unstable I went for weeks using things like newspaper and the mail, a threatening TV License reminder letter made for a particularly satisfying wipe. Got painful though and went back to proper toilet paper. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045640 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gary C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 I could've tried waiting 'til I go to work, but that's an hour away. I'm typing as I shit. I found some rough-looking kitchen towel, but I'm not sure whether it'll flush. I may have to jump in the shower afterwards. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045642 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gary C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 (edited) Iain C said: Last year when I was a bit unstable I went for weeks using things like newspaper and the mail, a threatening TV License reminder letter made for a particularly satisfying wipe. Got painful though and went back to proper toilet paper. Do I recall you wiping on Maddie's face? The initial log is out of the way, but I'm waiting for more. I've got a bit of a headache now too; pasta overdose. Edited May 20, 2009 by Gary C Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045643 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Post turd showers are the balls. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide Velazquez's signature Hide all signatures Hugh Hefner's Nephew Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045645 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Yegg Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 (edited) I had an annoying rich ass friend who would only ever wipe with scented wetnaps. Edited May 20, 2009 by Yegg Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045649 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gary C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 The paper flushed. Crisis averted, for now. I'm going to steal a roll from work because this isn't over yet. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045650 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyrex Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 I have got the CRAZIEST idea (American, I know): GO BUY FUCKING TOILET PAPER! Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide all signatures Follow WATMM on Twitter: @WATMMOfficial Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045653 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Iain C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Gary C said: Iain C said: Last year when I was a bit unstable I went for weeks using things like newspaper and the mail, a threatening TV License reminder letter made for a particularly satisfying wipe. Got painful though and went back to proper toilet paper. Do I recall you wiping on Maddie's face? I worked through an entire copy of the Daily Sport from back to front, ending with a front-page picture of Maddie. I hadn't realised I'd done it until I gave the paper the customary inspection. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045664 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Joyrex said: I have got the CRAZIEST idea (American, I know): GO BUY FUCKING TOILET PAPER! this might work. i would try repainting the toilet first thought, see if that helps Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045666 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyrex Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Fred McGriff said: Joyrex said: I have got the CRAZIEST idea (American, I know): GO BUY FUCKING TOILET PAPER! this might work. i would try repainting the toilet first thought, see if that helps Nah, you have to replace the toilet, install a pressurized bidet (so you can blast the shitbits off your browneye), and rig up an MP3 player in the seat - THEN buy toilet paper. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide all signatures Follow WATMM on Twitter: @WATMMOfficial Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045671 Share on other sites More sharing options...
BCM Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 we should resurrect my thread about alternatives to toilet paper. i recommend using either a sock or a slice of bread. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide BCM's signature Hide all signatures Bandcamp | Spotify | SoundCloud | Amazon | Apple Music | YouTube | YouTube Music | Deezer | Google Play Music Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045674 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyrex Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Banana leaves... Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide all signatures Follow WATMM on Twitter: @WATMMOfficial Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045676 Share on other sites More sharing options...
BCM Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 flexible metal spatula Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide BCM's signature Hide all signatures Bandcamp | Spotify | SoundCloud | Amazon | Apple Music | YouTube | YouTube Music | Deezer | Google Play Music Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045681 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gary C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 3 sea shells? Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045682 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Rambo Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 never wipe imo It's like with hair, eventually it will naturally wash itself. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045683 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 cat pelt Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045684 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Welcome Mat. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide Velazquez's signature Hide all signatures Hugh Hefner's Nephew Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045688 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 the cardboard roll of a finished toilet paper tube. also, i feel a little knock knock knockin on heaven's door right now but because i'm extremely perceptive with my bowels i know that this shit is not ready. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045695 Share on other sites More sharing options...
soundwave Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 Fred McGriff said: the cardboard roll of a finished toilet paper tube. also, i feel a little knock knock knockin on heaven's door right now but because i'm extremely perceptive with my bowels i know that this shit is not ready. The last resort.... the qusetion being how many flat edges can you make before thumb space becomes premium. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045697 Share on other sites More sharing options...
BCM Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 1st class stamp Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide BCM's signature Hide all signatures Bandcamp | Spotify | SoundCloud | Amazon | Apple Music | YouTube | YouTube Music | Deezer | Google Play Music Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045698 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 errant confetti Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045699 Share on other sites More sharing options...
BCM Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 lol advanced wiping Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide BCM's signature Hide all signatures Bandcamp | Spotify | SoundCloud | Amazon | Apple Music | YouTube | YouTube Music | Deezer | Google Play Music Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045701 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gary C Posted May 20, 2009 Report Share Posted May 20, 2009 I've used a sock before and, rather than having to deal with the shame, I threw it out of the window... it landed on the roof opposite. Good times. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/45836-need-a-shit/#findComment-1045702 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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