how do you wipe?

two up, two down, one polish. pat and poke.

I start with a sitting back-to-front. Then do a couple of pinches and maybe a front-to-back. Then I stand up on both legs and bend a bit over and do the same routine standing. Get access to different areas.

usually due to someone standing in fire or not switching targets quickly enough.

luls

Usually start with two downs and then an up, after that I don't follow any rules and I just get into the zone and get involved with my asshole. I try to shit before showering sou as to reduce the necessity for intense wiping.

hang on, i'll make a video. 1 min.

1 min? it should take that long to construct the initial TP mitten

I fold them place tissue over vulnerable areas of the hand

I was half watching a movie the other day on TV and Dave Foley was playing this cult-leader character and anyway he was taking a wet shit full frontal nudity and then when he finishes shit-farting he just gets up, walks over to his bed and lays down, snuggling in. Only lol of the movie.

  On 12/13/2009 at 6:01 PM, Franklin said:

I was half watching a movie the other day on TV and Dave Foley was playing this cult-leader character and anyway he was taking a wet shit full frontal nudity and then when he finishes shit-farting he just gets up, walks over to his bed and lays down, snuggling in. Only lol of the movie.

that sounds absolutely fantastic, I must know more

my technique is pretty complicated and it would sound weird if i were to put it into words so i've taken a photo of myself to make it clearer.

probably nsfw

front to back, wiggle a little bit, last wipe is done standing in case of a speed run

  On 12/13/2009 at 6:05 PM, Coalbucket PI said:

  On 12/13/2009 at 6:01 PM, Franklin said:

I was half watching a movie the other day on TV and Dave Foley was playing this cult-leader character and anyway he was taking a wet shit full frontal nudity and then when he finishes shit-farting he just gets up, walks over to his bed and lays down, snuggling in. Only lol of the movie.

that sounds absolutely fantastic, I must know more

Here's a basic plot for the movie Postal, 2007: "In the ironically named city of Paradise, a recently laid-off loser teams up with his cult-leading uncle (dave foley) to steal a peculiar bounty of riches from their local amusement park; somehow, the recently arrived Taliban have a similar focus, but a far more sinister intent."

1 lol

1 shock (at foley's actual penis)

not worth it unfortunately---a .gif would be good though of that scene. It could be posted every 8 months in reiterations of this thread.

i lean forward quite a bit, but i wouldn't say standing. sticking my hand between my ass and a toilet is kind of asking for trouble, depending on the amount of space between said ass and bowl. but unfortunately tons of toilet paper are used a lot of the time—my GI tract is like a really bad amusement park haunted house ride that ends in diarrhea.

i stood to wipe for a good portion of my life.

i switched to a sit and lean when i start pooping in public restrooms daily.

I usually open with a well padded digging wipe for chunks and clots, discard, mummify my hand again, and then i dig even deeper. I might even spit on it to loosen the deposits for the next wipe. Then i mummify my hand again and start lean-jacking off, usually balancing myself by taking a dildo, that I've suctioned to the wall, into my mouth.

Then I run tissue around the outer crevice, step up the masturbation, roll my eyes back, and anchor the dildo deep into my throat. I blow really hard out of my nose so I feel the sting of my breath against my tearful eyes. Then I foot-dial my friend's mom and listen to her say "hello? who is this? i can't understand you" while I jack off and start beaking my asshole with a wax mold of my hand in a goose formation. Then I usually wakeup in different clothes in my car, in a drive-thru, and I have no idea what I ordered.

LOL

  On 12/13/2009 at 7:35 PM, LUDD said:

my technique is pretty complicated and it would sound weird if i were to put it into words so i've taken a photo of myself to make it clearer.

 

probably nsfw

 

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

 

umm, WTF is going on here? that isn't... no. it can't be.

  On 12/14/2009 at 12:23 AM, hexagon son said:

  On 12/13/2009 at 7:35 PM, LUDD said:

my technique is pretty complicated and it would sound weird if i were to put it into words so i've taken a photo of myself to make it clearer.

 

probably nsfw

 

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

 

umm, WTF is going on here? that isn't... no. it can't be.

there's a pretty big bong in the background it looks like

With my family, usually we invite my sister, LUDD and lala down and we sit round the table for a nice meal, have a laugh and catch up. We all then go and shit, return to the table, and wait for everyone to return, then we wipe in sexual unison. It's my favourite day of the week. We all save our shit up for this weekly ritual so that we can all have the same thorough, lengthy wiping session.

If one of us has a no wiper we all chuckle and say "gotta go shit again", we wait for them to return and begin the wiping. Sometimes we wipe each other but only if one of us is ill, if this is so then we will all wipe each other, with the ill person at the front so that they don't have to wipe anyone, coz of course they are too ill to wipe, otherwise though we all wipe ourselves.

I find it extremely hot that you wipe with your sister.

  On 12/14/2009 at 2:14 AM, sneaksta303 said:

I find it extremely hot that you wipe with your sister.

So do me and my sister.

  On 12/13/2009 at 10:13 PM, Adjective said:

i stood to wipe for a good portion of my life.

i switched to a sit and lean when i start pooping in public restrooms daily.

 

I usually open with a well padded digging wipe for chunks and clots, discard, mummify my hand again, and then i dig even deeper. I might even spit on it to loosen the deposits for the next wipe. Then i mummify my hand again and start lean-jacking off, usually balancing myself by taking a dildo, that I've suctioned to the wall, into my mouth.

Then I run tissue around the outer crevice, step up the masturbation, roll my eyes back, and anchor the dildo deep into my throat. I blow really hard out of my nose so I feel the sting of my breath against my tearful eyes. Then I foot-dial my friend's mom and listen to her say "hello? who is this? i can't understand you" while I jack off and start beaking my asshole with a wax mold of my hand in a goose formation. Then I usually wakeup in different clothes in my car, in a drive-thru, and I have no idea what I ordered.

lol

  On 12/13/2009 at 10:13 PM, Adjective said:

i stood to wipe for a good portion of my life.

i switched to a sit and lean when i start pooping in public restrooms daily.

 

I usually open with a well padded digging wipe for chunks and clots, discard, mummify my hand again, and then i dig even deeper. I might even spit on it to loosen the deposits for the next wipe. Then i mummify my hand again and start lean-jacking off, usually balancing myself by taking a dildo, that I've suctioned to the wall, into my mouth.

Then I run tissue around the outer crevice, step up the masturbation, roll my eyes back, and anchor the dildo deep into my throat. I blow really hard out of my nose so I feel the sting of my breath against my tearful eyes. Then I foot-dial my friend's mom and listen to her say "hello? who is this? i can't understand you" while I jack off and start beaking my asshole with a wax mold of my hand in a goose formation. Then I usually wakeup in different clothes in my car, in a drive-thru, and I have no idea what I ordered.

lol

  On 12/13/2009 at 10:13 PM, Adjective said:

i stood to wipe for a good portion of my life.

i switched to a sit and lean when i start pooping in public restrooms daily.

 

I usually open with a well padded digging wipe for chunks and clots, discard, mummify my hand again, and then i dig even deeper. I might even spit on it to loosen the deposits for the next wipe. Then i mummify my hand again and start lean-jacking off, usually balancing myself by taking a dildo, that I've suctioned to the wall, into my mouth.

Then I run tissue around the outer crevice, step up the masturbation, roll my eyes back, and anchor the dildo deep into my throat. I blow really hard out of my nose so I feel the sting of my breath against my tearful eyes. Then I foot-dial my friend's mom and listen to her say "hello? who is this? i can't understand you" while I jack off and start beaking my asshole with a wax mold of my hand in a goose formation. Then I usually wakeup in different clothes in my car, in a drive-thru, and I have no idea what I ordered.

lol

  On 12/13/2009 at 10:13 PM, Adjective said:

i stood to wipe for a good portion of my life.

i switched to a sit and lean when i start pooping in public restrooms daily.

 

I usually open with a well padded digging wipe for chunks and clots, discard, mummify my hand again, and then i dig even deeper. I might even spit on it to loosen the deposits for the next wipe. Then i mummify my hand again and start lean-jacking off, usually balancing myself by taking a dildo, that I've suctioned to the wall, into my mouth.

Then I run tissue around the outer crevice, step up the masturbation, roll my eyes back, and anchor the dildo deep into my throat. I blow really hard out of my nose so I feel the sting of my breath against my tearful eyes. Then I foot-dial my friend's mom and listen to her say "hello? who is this? i can't understand you" while I jack off and start beaking my asshole with a wax mold of my hand in a goose formation. Then I usually wakeup in different clothes in my car, in a drive-thru, and I have no idea what I ordered.

lol

  On 12/13/2009 at 4:20 AM, zaphod said:

how do you wipe?

With style.

  On 12/13/2009 at 4:20 AM, zaphod said:

how do you wipe?

Youre supposed to wipe?