Marriage

Has anybody here ever married where the principal reason was something other than romantic love. I know there will always be practical considerations, but has anyone married for money? Friendship? Kids?

lady kapapo up the duff?

No, not lady. Rich friend has hit a certain age and wants kids.

I had to get married when I did to obtain a visa to stay in the country with my GF. We were already engaged, but it was all a bit shot-gun, if you know what I mean. The relationship went downhill after that. I just wasn't ready.

  On 5/22/2012 at 4:03 PM, kakapo said:

No, not lady. Rich friend has hit a certain age and wants kids.

dont think there's any particular need to get married to achieve this in this day and age...is it a bloke?

Neither of us would have kids outside of marriage. Not at this point anyway.

traditionalist huh? why the need for a piece of paper before you feel it's ok to have kids? imo things like having enough money to support them, having a half decent place to live, necessary maturity to be a parent etc are all much more important than a marriage licence...

that seems like a selfish reason to get married and will most likely not last.

does this rich bird want to pay you to marry and impregnate her? wtf. leave well alone.

thought you were already in a relationship? in which case wtf. leave well alone.

no.

but i am starting to think i should have married for money.

  On 5/22/2012 at 4:28 PM, jules said:

no.

 

but i am starting to think i should have married for money.

THIS

My friend married a guy so he could get a green card to stay in the country. They also care about each other but this was really early on before they loved one another. Suppose they were lucky really.

My friend had been going out with a Russian girl for only 6 months before he proposed and they got married within a year. He said that they were sure they were going to get married anyway, so they might as well have made it sooner so that it was easier for her to stay in Britain.

They're still together a year later, and don't seem like they'll ever break-up.

  On 5/22/2012 at 4:16 PM, BCM said:

traditionalist huh? why the need for a piece of paper before you feel it's ok to have kids? imo things like having enough money to support them, having a half decent place to live, necessary maturity to be a parent etc are all much more important than a marriage licence...

We would have all that as well,

  On 5/22/2012 at 4:17 PM, keltoi said:

that seems like a selfish reason to get married and will most likely not last.

I agree, which is why I asked.

  On 5/22/2012 at 4:20 PM, keltoi said:

does this rich bird want to pay you to marry and impregnate her? wtf. leave well alone.

 

thought you were already in a relationship? in which case wtf. leave well alone.

I'm doing a disservice to the situation by being flippant. Long term close friend, always been interested in me romantically, started talking practicalities. Love her to bits as a friend, just never romantically. She comes from old money and has financial security, I earn substantially more. Not in a relationship, but in love with other friend (unrequited, not you lady k if you're reading, you fat hairy trollop).

i always thought you were genuinely in a relationship with lady kakapo....

  On 5/22/2012 at 4:43 PM, kakapo said:

 

  On 5/22/2012 at 4:20 PM, keltoi said:

does this rich bird want to pay you to marry and impregnate her? wtf. leave well alone.

 

thought you were already in a relationship? in which case wtf. leave well alone.

 

I'm doing a disservice to the situation by being flippant. Long term close friend, always been interested in me romantically, started talking practicalities. Love her to bits as a friend, just never romantically. She comes from old money and has financial security, I earn substantially more. Not in a relationship, but in love with other friend (unrequited, not you lady k if you're reading, you fat hairy trollop).

lol. did lady k do the dirty on you? (i mean lol at "you fat hairy trollop" not lol that she might have done the dirty on you)

anyway, i see it going 1 of 3 ways...

1. you bond over the creation and upbringing of your child(ren) and fall in love like you never imagined possible... live happily ever after.

2. you go through the motions for the rest of your life for the sake of the child(ren). you know you're living a lie and grow to resent yourself and your family... constantly wondering what real love must feel like, probably becoming a self loathing, raging alcoholic.

3. after valiantly trying and basically pretending to be something you are not, you wake up in 3 years time thinking "WHAT... THE FUCK... HAVE I DONE!!?". you leave and have limited contact with your child(ren), making it pretty much impossible to maintain any level of closeness while rich bitch gets exactly what she wanted.

Just signing in for the first time in 3 months to mention that if you hadn't punched girl B's friend (who was just a friend by the way), you might not have to even be in this situation. Grow up and stop using your self destructive streak as an excuse. Maybe then you'll be ready for kids.

/last post

lol

haha ouch

I didn't actually punch him.