Share a little joke

I heard this joke today and i thought it was pretty funny..

So a mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "we dont serve your kind here" and the mushroom responds with "why not, i'm a fun guy"

Share jokes you heard, i'll be laughing for sure.

yes but 'fungi' is plural and this eukaryote appears unaccompanied

also mushrooms & alcohol are not a funny combination, okay.

A horse walks into the bar and orders a drink.

Later on they find out he is a robot.

A: some kids just poured lighter fluid on my dog & lit him on fire

B: wow, sounds like he must have had a real ruff time

a guy walks into a bar. OUCH!!

my brother swallowed some pennies but we didn't notice any change in him...

A man knocks at your front door, shouting that his name is simply 'Boo,' and inquiring as to the source of your sadness.

I am literally a small flock of beards posing as a human

lol jk i tricked u

  On 2/7/2013 at 12:53 AM, Cryptowen said:

I am literally a small flock of beards posing as a human

 

lol jk i tricked u

seems legit

a woman reports to her husband "i've just heard some great news on the radio. the police know who the pedophile is and they're going to arrest him tonight"

her husband replies "that's fantastic. let's celebrate by moving permanently to australia"

My girlfriend told me to kiss her where it stinks, so I drove her to New Jersey.

The flea was walking down the street when all of the sudden it was jumped by a gang of roaches, the flea starts running and starts knocking on the centipede's door, the flea was like "open up please open up!!, im being robbed", the centipede awoken by the knocks says to the flea "hold on flea, i'll be right there just let me put on my shoes first".

Q: what's the best thing about eating your own poop?

A: the free poop

  On 2/7/2013 at 3:39 AM, LimpyLoo said:

Q: what's the best thing about eating your own poop?

 

A: all the free poop you can eat

Fixt.

So i entered 10 puns in a pun contest because i thought at least one of them would win. But no pun in 10 did

  On 2/7/2013 at 12:23 AM, doorjamb said:

yes but 'fungi' is plural and this eukaryote appears unaccompanied

 

also mushrooms & alcohol are not a funny combination, okay.

  On 2/7/2013 at 12:51 AM, doorjamb said:

A man knocks at your front door, shouting that his name is simply 'Boo,' and inquiring as to the source of your sadness.

Are you German?

  On 2/7/2013 at 4:03 AM, Braintree said:

 

  On 2/7/2013 at 3:39 AM, LimpyLoo said:

Q: what's the best thing about eating your own poop?

 

A: all the free poop you can eat

Fixt.

Don't mess with my art, man.

  On 2/7/2013 at 12:51 AM, doorjamb said:

A man knocks at your front door, shouting that his name is simply 'Boo,' and inquiring as to the source of your sadness.

What did the grape say when it got stepped on?

Nothing - it just gave a little wine.

This thread is so punny

I told my dog that I was going to send him to obedience school. He then looked me in the eye and said "no".

Thank you, thank you. You're all too kind.

My girlfriend told me to fuck her 8 inches and hurt her. So I fucked her twice and punched her in the nose.

9 out of ten enjoy gang rape

:(