Slicker than/Smoother than...

I need help. I require a new phrase along the lines of...

“slicker than cum on a gold tooth”

“slicker than owl shit”

“smoother than a greased up pool boy”

slicker than dolphin dick

Yeah good one sal, that kinda thang!

slicker than exxon valdez

smoother than a very smooth thing

Slicker than placenta n’ eggs

Slicker than jizz on a toddler's anus

that’s it, I’m goina fackin kill you, mate

*moight (spoken with a bogan accent)

slicker than grits

smoother than gravy

Slicker than grits and gravy on a smooth walrus ass

Slicker than smooth gravy on a gritty walrus ass.

  On 6/15/2018 at 3:06 AM, chenGOD said:

Slicker than smooth gravy on a gritty walrus ass.

^lol, nice

Slicker than wet monkey bars with KFC hands

Smoother than a skin boat sailing into Tuna Town

Slicker than a time traveling con artist that goes back in time to steal a submarine and mate with a whale swimming in olive oil.

Smoother than a sunglasses salesman actively lodged in a sewage pipe.

Slicker than pigeon shit sliding down the windshield of a limo after impact on a hot day

Smoother than a duophonic chord from a sine wave oscillator half an octave apart

slicker than a greaser's collar

slicker than a lorry drivers lung butter

slicker than a sorority sister on a waterslide

slicker than a wetherspoons pickleback.

smoother than a toad abortion

smoother than toad of toad halls blowbacks. 

Smoother than power steering

Slicker than a boiled owl in a rubber tubesock