I farted on a kid at best buy

Yeah that's right. I was in the checkout line at best buy, purchasing "Gran Torino" and "Funny Farm" on DVD for my dad for father's day, waiting while some crusty old biddy was dictating her address to the 13 year old mexican checkout girl to join the rapid rewards membership or whatever. a kid and his mom are behind me arguing over a pack of sugarless gum. shut the fuck up kid, your mom doesnt want to buy you the gum. the kid wants the gum so baaaad though and because it's sugarless he should have it. you know what i did? I farted on the kid. farted on him and his mom. smelled like shit. their conversation came to an immediate hault and they retreated over to the next checkout line. as I was checking out I looked across the register and saw the kid there in the other line and i stared him down till he looked away. I wonder if that was something totally new for him, farting and not being ashamed of it. farting on a stranger and then following up with a stare down. and then i walked out with my head high.

edit: less paedo

tough guy

Amazing.

bitch had it coming

ahaha awsome !

pretty cool. but were you drunk?

I saw a man wash his penis (uncircumsied) in the public basin today. He then dried it in a Dyson Airblade. I didn't stare him down.

not drunk, but full of philly cheese steak. it smelled like a pasture blew through

  kakapo said:

I saw a man wash his penis (uncircumsied) in the public basin today. He then dried it in a Dyson Airblade. I didn't stare him down.

sometimes fathers bring their little girls into the men's room

that happened one time when i was at steak-n-shake... [athf]

don't pull your penis out unless you really need to[/athf] imo

joyrex on a posting spree

  Fred McGriff said:

not drunk, but full of philly cheese steak. it smelled like a pasture blew through

Fucking LOL, Classic McGriff™

  IRARI said:

  kakapo said:

I saw a man wash his penis (uncircumsied) in the public basin today. He then dried it in a Dyson Airblade. I didn't stare him down.

 

sometimes fathers bring their little girls into the men's room

that happened one time when i was at steak-n-shake... [athf]

don't pull your penis out unless you really need to[/athf] imo

the last time i had steak n shake i had to roll down the window on the way home and projectile vomit. that was 10 years ago.

joyrex is bit like american alan partridge

Did you turn and deliver?

  dese manz hatin said:

joyrex on a posting spree

you've been had

  dese manz hatin said:

joyrex on a posting spree

errr. That's a mcgriff thread. But i understand mistake ; everyone is wearing sligthly different versions of this ET/frog/lizard monster as avatar. That's really confusing, and i'm against it

  Etch said:

Did you turn and deliver?

what does that mean?

you know how if you don't cum for a certain time, you cum harder when you finally do let rip?

i wish farts were that way, like you could not fart for a while and then all of a sudden kaboom

I was walking in my neighborhood a couple months ago and I saw some dude hanging half way out of the passenger side door of a pick up truck. I got a little closer and noticed his hands were way down his pants, and he was choking the life out of his dick.

Did you turn and fire a sour air biscuit at the little blighter or did you just drop a daisy cutter and take out the whole area?

  Fred McGriff said:

  IRARI said:

  kakapo said:

I saw a man wash his penis (uncircumsied) in the public basin today. He then dried it in a Dyson Airblade. I didn't stare him down.

 

sometimes fathers bring their little girls into the men's room

that happened one time when i was at steak-n-shake... [athf]

don't pull your penis out unless you really need to[/athf] imo

 

the last time i had steak n shake i had to roll down the window on the way home and projectile vomit. that was 10 years ago.

that's all well and good but i like steak-n-shake because they give you the option of ordering a red bull as your drink

  Babar said:

  dese manz hatin said:

joyrex on a posting spree

 

errr. That's a mcgriff thread. But i understand mistake ; everyone is wearing sligthly different versions of this ET/frog/lizard monster as avatar. That's really confusing, and i'm against it

Did you just whine?

  Etch said:

Did you turn and fire a sour air biscuit at the little blighter or did you just drop a daisy cutter and take out the whole area?

we were queued up in line, so my rear was already aimed directly at him and he was probably < 1 foot away from me.

Oh my god. Right in his eyes.

Thats how you drop the heat people. There is a serious lesson to be learnt here. Every word a sermon.

Fred how many people total have you ever farted on