Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 my friend is opening a pan-asian restaurant and we need some original fortune cookie lines, any ideas? Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/ Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blir Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 "The bathroom is that way --->" Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118900 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Calx Sherbet Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 HELP I'M BEING HELD PRISONER IN A CHINESE BAKERY Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118901 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest theSun Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 i had one once that said "pick another fortune cookie" Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118911 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest my usernames always really suck Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 THAT WASN'T A FORTUNE COOKIE Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118918 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Benedict Cumberbatch Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 I'm watching you you will meet a blonde midget stranger This cookie sponsored by rent-o-kill Enjoy this meal it may be your last Make my dough punk Hiya! Pan-Asian tonight hey? What, couldn't handle another burrito? Hows my driving? 1-800-555-5555 Chef wanted. [insert restaurant name here]. what're you looking at? tough guy are ya? Your destiny is to marry a fortune cookie fortune writer named Bill Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118926 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 Confucius say: 14" sweatpants boner- pretty ok. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide Velazquez's signature Hide all signatures Hugh Hefner's Nephew Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118927 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 On 9/9/2009 at 8:33 PM, Calx Sherbet said: HELP I'M BEING HELD PRISONER IN A CHINESE BAKERY lol i like this one a lot p.s. fuck you Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118929 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idrn Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 don't look now but i think that guy is checking you out meh Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118930 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 On 9/9/2009 at 8:48 PM, Benedict Cumberbatch said: I'm watching you you will meet a blonde midget stranger This cookie sponsored by rent-o-kill Enjoy this meal it may be your last Make my dough punk Hiya! Pan-Asian tonight hey? What, couldn't handle another burrito? Hows my driving? 1-800-555-5555 Chef wanted. [insert restaurant name here]. what're you looking at? tough guy are ya? Your destiny is to marry a fortune cookie fortune writer named Bill these ones sound like the things written on taco bell hot sauce packets. some decent ones in there. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118931 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest placidburp Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 (edited) "You are about to be banned from a forum on teh internets." witty? oh sorry. Edited September 9, 2009 by placidburp Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118932 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 god i used to be so creative. i cant believe i cant come up with a damn thing. my brain is all gordoed up these days Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118938 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Benedict Cumberbatch Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 have you considered you may be a homosexual? have you considered you may be a hetrosexual? in a pastlife you were ugly too Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118942 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 Note to self: get more paper for inner monolo Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118944 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Velazquez Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 Note To Bill Self. Bill me later. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide Velazquez's signature Hide all signatures Hugh Hefner's Nephew Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118948 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 Sorry chief, fortunes are for Lifetime Members. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118951 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fred McGriff Posted September 9, 2009 Author Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 On 9/9/2009 at 9:04 PM, Adjective said: Note to self: get more paper for inner monolo this is some really progressive thinking Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118952 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brandi_B Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 (edited) On 9/9/2009 at 8:27 PM, Fred McGriff said: my friend is opening a pan-asian restaurant and we need some original fortune cookie lines, any ideas? Once you pop, you can't stop. On 9/9/2009 at 8:27 PM, Fred McGriff said: my friend is opening a pan-asian restaurant and we need some original fortune cookie lines, any ideas? "Tomorrow will be your worst day, but every one after that will be you best" Edited September 9, 2009 by Brandi_B Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118953 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Calx Sherbet Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 On 9/9/2009 at 8:51 PM, Fred McGriff said: On 9/9/2009 at 8:33 PM, Calx Sherbet said: HELP I'M BEING HELD PRISONER IN A CHINESE BAKERY lol i like this one a lot p.s. fuck you what? oh, and maybe "brought to you by Carl's Jr." Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118955 Share on other sites More sharing options...
encey Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 Confucius say: Man who live in glass house, should dress in basement. Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide encey's signature Hide all signatures essines said: i am hot shit ... that smells like baking bread. Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118959 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dementia Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 "Hello Neo, do you know who this is?" "NASDAQ 2055.01 + 17.24 0.85% DJIA 9519.86 + 22.52 0.24% S&P 1030.17 + 4.78 0.47%" Ideas: -Someone's funny grocery list -A target or something that'd flag the patron for a kill shot -suicide note Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide Dementia's signature Hide all signatures Soundcloud Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118961 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Adjective Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 Take this message to old man across the street, note the "strange weather" we're having and walk away. The sparrow mourns for two weeks. Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118962 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Siegecow Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 "man this shit is ridiculous... i'm fucking addicted to this whimsical lifestyle where i wake up, thats even if i went to sleep at all cuz so many nights lately i have much better things to do than sleep... and like, man, i'm dancing through the world like "hahahahahahh you white peasants suck at this" and like i'm moving so fast and for-once-in-my-life-not-trying-to-be-anything-other-than-what- the-fuck-i-actually-am that it's fucking fantastic. i find myself truly becoming more and more like the doctor, the kind of comments i make... they come naturally and brilliantly i might add. i'm literally texting myself ~15 one-liners/song-ideas per day and like, man, i dont even have to try... but when i do.. wow." Thanks Haha Confused Sad Facepalm Burger Farnsworth Big Brain Like × Quote Hide Siegecow's signature Hide all signatures On 3/16/2011 at 8:14 PM, troon said: fuck off! Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118964 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idrn Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 monosodium glutamate, bitch Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118965 Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest idrn Posted September 9, 2009 Report Share Posted September 9, 2009 your lemony hand towel is also my bum flannel Quote Link to comment https://forum.watmm.com/topic/48811-need-witty-fortune-cookie-fortunes/#findComment-1118970 Share on other sites More sharing options...
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