squarepusher The holy union of bathroomery

the first time i ever spunked was on the bog... i had a multiple toiletgasm (about 5 or 6 in a row) but with no spuzz emission and without my boner subsiding, then on the 6th or 7th time i got a bingo and the floodgates were opened. tried to achieve that again soon after but it never happened. nowadays i have to put my face right down in the pan, just after ive taken a shit, to even get a semi-on

I know the feeling

  On 9/22/2009 at 1:12 AM, LUDD said:

nowadays i have to put my face right down in the pan, just after ive taken a shit, to even get a semi-on

I blame the internets

I heard that when you fart with a shaved ass, the fart feels like it's kinda squeezed between both cheeks and it's very uncomfortable

i used to get nice bum bumbles when youre sitting down and the fart gets stuck between your cheeks and you can rock it back and forth up and down your crease... my arsecrack is like a shit encrusted thatched cottage roof now so no chance of that anymore

FML

poor ludd

for this to really make sense you should vomit and hemorrhage into the toilet too.

then things really start to make sense

  On 9/22/2009 at 2:37 AM, LUDD said:

i used to get nice bum bumbles when youre sitting down and the fart gets stuck between your cheeks and you can rock it back and forth up and down your crease... my arsecrack is like a shit encrusted thatched cottage roof now so no chance of that anymore

 

FML

Fucking lol, same here bro (althought you probably know that).

  On 9/22/2009 at 3:04 AM, 42Orange said:

for this to really make sense you should vomit and hemorrhage into the toilet too.

 

then things really start to make sense

good point. Where is my mother with the spoon?

  On 9/22/2009 at 3:08 AM, abusivegeorge said:

  On 9/22/2009 at 2:37 AM, LUDD said:

i used to get nice bum bumbles when youre sitting down and the fart gets stuck between your cheeks and you can rock it back and forth up and down your crease... my arsecrack is like a shit encrusted thatched cottage roof now so no chance of that anymore

 

FML

 

Fucking lol, same here bro (althought you probably know that).

no . no i didn't. always good to know though.

also. bumbles = bubbles

Yes you will probably need to know for the next time we sleep in bed together. In case you decide to fondle.

Ouch, fucking hell, lol.

I hate when you wipe your ass but the hair holds onto all the shit. It can take forever to wipe.

I trim my ass hair but if i shaved it would get all stubbly and thats mega uncomfortable.

Oh uncomfortable fate

i was in the woods once taking a shit and i crouched down at an angle where i ended up just shitting right into my shorts. this turned me on so i fucked an oak tree, then listened to an unreleased tycho track called moonshine megarainbow while i pulled bark out of my ravaged penis.

*shakes head*

  On 9/22/2009 at 8:44 PM, zaphod said:

i was in the woods once taking a shit and i crouched down at an angle where i ended up just shitting right into my shorts. this turned me on so i fucked an oak tree, then listened to an unreleased tycho track called moonshine megarainbow while i pulled bark out of my ravaged penis.

 

Fucking what lol

  On 9/23/2009 at 12:23 AM, abusivegeorge said:

  On 9/22/2009 at 8:44 PM, zaphod said:

i was in the woods once taking a shit and i crouched down at an angle where i ended up just shitting right into my shorts. this turned me on so i fucked an oak tree, then listened to an unreleased tycho track called moonshine megarainbow while i pulled bark out of my ravaged penis.

 

 

Fucking what lol

idm.

my friend once shit too low in a patch of poison ivy while drunk. he had a rash all up in his crack, bad times.

apparently, and according to the thread title,..

i haven't 'live'.

tremendous.

  On 9/22/2009 at 1:12 AM, LUDD said:

the first time i ever spunked was on the bog... i had a multiple toiletgasm (about 5 or 6 in a row) but with no spuzz emission and without my boner subsiding, then on the 6th or 7th time i got a bingo and the floodgates were opened. tried to achieve that again soon after but it never happened. nowadays i have to put my face right down in the pan, just after ive taken a shit, to even get a semi-on

i think you're talking about masturbation here but i'm just not sure

  On 9/22/2009 at 8:44 PM, zaphod said:

moonshine megarainbow

lols

  On 9/23/2009 at 1:37 AM, JohnTqs said:

  On 9/22/2009 at 1:12 AM, LUDD said:

the first time i ever spunked was on the bog... i had a multiple toiletgasm (about 5 or 6 in a row) but with no spuzz emission and without my boner subsiding, then on the 6th or 7th time i got a bingo and the floodgates were opened. tried to achieve that again soon after but it never happened. nowadays i have to put my face right down in the pan, just after ive taken a shit, to even get a semi-on

 

i think you're talking about masturbation here but i'm just not sure

Yeah I got a bit confused at having to put your head right down in the pan thing? I think maybe he is trying to suck his own cock, and thats the only way he can really get a boner anymore.

you know... the pan? the toilet? where the shit i have just done is?

what this thread is about

Yes but why are you putting your head down there to get a semi on? Are you saying you need to smell your own shit to get a semi on?

dur dur dur smell and radiation