stupid first world problems you're dealing with

Can't stop farting.

  On 1/6/2022 at 2:46 AM, kakapo said:

Can't stop farting.

I create so many computer problems for myself that i never have a working laptop.  I spent hundreds on a quality computer and it never works because i cant stop myself from messing with the operating system until it's broken.  I fucking hate myself.

getting a super hi score on the chrome dinosaur minigame and then the connection works again ffs

  On 1/6/2022 at 2:46 AM, kakapo said:

Can't stop farting.

farts + jars = profit.  be safe though. 

Sounds like she has gut rot. Why don't she just take a shit on tray, leave some jars nearby and let the fumes from the shit waft into the jars. She could fill about 30 jars per shit. 

  On 1/9/2022 at 7:16 AM, ignatius said:

farts + jars = profit.  be safe though. 

 

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USPS sucks so bad omg

They marked a package delivered "at the front door" on a day when the road to my house is literally blocked by a landslide. Within thirty minutes they marked a different package as "no access." No mail has arrived here (or anywhere beyond the landslide) since last Thursday. Ace Ventura over there probably just booted the package into the ravine and called it a day. 

reading thru the DANK MEMES thread at 4am and wanting to make comments and funny observations about them, except you can't really do that because the thread is so big and i don't have my own memes or anything of value to add.

after scrolling for a while i find a meme in there which is so lit woke blin dank that i saved it, went to a photo print site and i have now actually purchased a high quality poster print of the meme. i could only afford 7-day shipping and i'll probably black out at 5am, fuck.

I woke up at 3:15 pm and feel horrible for wasting my day. Luckily I had no work today.

  On 1/15/2022 at 1:59 AM, yekker said:

I woke up at 3:15 pm and feel horrible for wasting my day. Luckily I had no work today.

Welcum 2 my world.

a lesson in how stress fucks your brain up:

after sweating for 3 hours over a certain process I thought I had fucked up (I hadn't even, it ended up turning out well) and around which there were important expectations, I was called away to go pick someone up quickly, and in my haste I unthinkingly ran a red light, cutting off a car coming through perpendicularly. I hadn't realised what I'd done until I was through. I'd honked at the other car in annoyance thinking they were at fault. now I'm fucking mad at myself for doing something so stupid, for allowing the stress of the other situation to make me do something so stupid, especially when I pride myself on being a good driver. the cherry on top is that I once had someone cut me off at that very intersection in the same way and I've remembered that shit for years. I almost wish that car had road rage-followed me so that I could've gotten out and apologised and set things straight.

I've made waaaaay too many bad impulse decisions while driving that I've instantly regretted.  No bad accidents yet... but I'm still pretty fresh.

one of the houses in my street is being renovated (yet another one), just 20 meters away from me. they're doing heavy work on the facade at the moment, which is extremely noisy. i'm thinking of asking the workers how long the renovation is gonna take but i fear their answer will depress me so i'm probably not gonna ask them. at least a few weeks of soft torture, by the looks of it.

  On 1/17/2022 at 11:59 AM, brian trageskin said:

one of the houses in my street is being renovated (yet another one), just 20 meters away from me. they're doing heavy work on the facade at the moment, which is extremely noisy. i'm thinking of asking the workers how long the renovation is gonna take but i fear their answer will depress me so i'm probably not gonna ask them. at least a few weeks of soft torture, by the looks of it.

that absolutely sucks i hope you find a way to keep enjoying music.

yeah i talked to one of the workers (better knowing how screwed you are than guessing) and while he didn't know how long this was gonna take (he's only here for a specific task), he told me they're turning that 2-story house into apartments and there's gonna be plumbing and electrical work. from the outside, it looks like they're pretty much doing everything from scratch inside the house. this is clearly gonna take months. months of super loud noise that lasts for hours and hours, day after day. i came here looking for peace and quiet. i was thinking of staying for a bit. i'm not so sure anymore. 

edit: 3-story house

  On 12/6/2021 at 10:16 AM, brian trageskin said:

public works right outside my window. they're digging up the road literally 3 meters away from me. 

they've been installing the fiber-optic network for months now and one of the manholes happens to be right by my doorstep. technicians have been coming every 3 days on average for the past several weeks, opening the manhole and doing their shit for hours, right by my doorstep. which they just did once again. i talked to one of them, he told me this was their penultimate job. at last. 

Nobody has ever offered to buy my farts.

I bottled my friend's fart in highschool but when I opened it like a year later there was no smell 

Tired of my goddamn AirPods dying on me overnight or mid-walk due to lack of proper low-battery signaling. They can be totally fine one day, sit overnight and be completely drained by morning when I'm walking the dog trying to listen to some tunes. 

Problem is, I learned a while back, that the pods and case drain each other when not in use. So if they're a little low, but the case is also low, the case will steal all the juice from the pods. Kind of fucked up, and they really need a better way to tell you they're low. I'm not trying to check the on-screen power levels every time I use them, and the light on the case doesn't have enough variations to really tell you what's going on. I'll occasionally hear a sound while using them, telling me they're dying, but it's usually too late to do anything about it as I'm on a walk. 5 minutes later one of them dies. Come on, Apple. 

matched w/someone on a dating app and she wants to get together for a workout on saturday.  lols.. haven't worked out in ages.. just cycling and basic stretching. 

i think she's a personal trainer on the side and this is a hustle. she's in wicked good shape obviously but is 32 (i'm 50) so i'm suspect. she'd wreck me in a workout obviously. 

who gets together for a workout on a first date/getting to know you situation? no one. that's who. 

  On 1/19/2022 at 11:54 AM, yekker said:

I bottled my friend's fart in highschool but when I opened it like a year later there was no smell 

one of your friends probably beat you to it. i'd ask "who stole my GF's fart???"

  On 1/19/2022 at 11:54 AM, yekker said:

I bottled my friend's fart in highschool but when I opened it like a year later there was no smell 

you should have sold it as an nft

I haven't sold an NFT that someone gifted me. Trying to get at least 0.5 eth.

i was about to order 4 records off of bleep but the shipping was going to be $55. now they are just sitting in my cart, laughing.

Brexit