stupid first world problems you're dealing with

As long as you didn't get Papa Murphy's, it's probably salvageable. 

I am made extremely uncomfortable by the grammatical aberration made by Americans that is 'on accident' (ugh just typing it makes me shudder).

I've just come across a tumblr post in which someone has written 'on mistake' and I need to shut my hand in a door or something to distract myself.

That "on accident" thing is really weird, and I've only started noticing it in recent years.  According to one research paper, it appears to be a Millennial thing.  Makes sense, since the time I started hearing it correlates with when that generation started graduating high school.

https://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/on-accident-versus-by-accident?page=1

"I could care less" is the one that does me in. if you could care less, it means you care some... which means you care.

"it's" instead of "its" really irks me but it's so common I've given up. Pretty sure I've made that mistake many times

I'm pretty sure I made this exact post about 5 years ago, but how hard is it to include scans of the art/liner notes with the digital version of an album?

  On 5/22/2018 at 3:17 PM, doublename said:

I'm pretty sure I made this exact post about 5 years ago, but how hard is it to include scans of the art/liner notes with the digital version of an album?

i, too, wish to know this

  On 5/22/2018 at 5:58 AM, hello spiral said:

I am made extremely uncomfortable by the grammatical aberration made by Americans that is 'on accident' (ugh just typing it makes me shudder).

I've just come across a tumblr post in which someone has written 'on mistake' and I need to shut my hand in a door or something to distract myself.

"should of" 

it’s a doggy dog world out there

  On 5/22/2018 at 5:34 PM, zaphod said:

 

  On 5/22/2018 at 5:58 AM, hello spiral said:

I am made extremely uncomfortable by the grammatical aberration made by Americans that is 'on accident' (ugh just typing it makes me shudder).

I've just come across a tumblr post in which someone has written 'on mistake' and I need to shut my hand in a door or something to distract myself.

 

"should of" 

 

At least if that one's said out loud it still translates as "should've."  On accident sounds and reads wrong. 

My most hated one that's become a journalism staple is "which begs the question" when something that was said makes a reporter wonder about something else (AKA nothing to do with using an unproven premise to prove itself to be true).

Just realized the song I was just mixing uses "should've" in the hook.  Which begs the question: did she actually mean "should of???1?1?"

Damn Amricams and their bastardized English

basterd

was driving home from the grocery store and decided to take a short cut through a quiet suburban road near some tennis courts. i see a cop car very slowly moving up the road in front of me, and as soon as he sees my headlights he slows down to a crawl, eventually letting me catch up to him at which point he stops completely and turns on his lights. he then proceeds to get out and ask me why i'm using this road. i can't really comprehend why i'm being asked this so i  ask if the road is closed. he does the usual volley of questions: where i'm headed tonight, what i'm doing, where i'm coming from. i tell him i was buying groceries and use this road to get home and again ask why i'm being stopped. he proceeds to lecture me about my attitude and then runs my license. at this point i'm fuming but trying to control myself because i want to go off on this asshole who is obviously on some kind of power trip and fishing for a drug stop or something. he comes back and tells me that the road has illicit activity on it (this is literally a small road in a suburb, like a leafy lane near a tennis court and a lake) and i looked suspicious. again, i was driving, at the speed limit, in a newish car. i guess driving is suspicious. anyway he lets me go having wasted about twenty minutes of my time. luckily i'm not black. i hate cops in this country. every interaction i've ever had with them has been terrible.

Moving out on the 30th, moving suuuuuuuuuucks. I'm excited to move, but can't wait for this whole process to be over.

made a dark meme-like post on FB about having to talk to health insurance provider about details of explanation of benefits etc and how it would be easier to just die... 

my mom called me crying.  

lol

Trying to buy a used car off of craigslist and NOT get swindled. 

Decided to buy some rice, which I never do because I recall cooking it was so much more complicated than it ought to be.  Get it home, began boiling some water to get to this rice action asap.  Then notice something in the directions that I missed at the store: let it soak for fucking half an hour??? then boil????  WTF I hate rice.  Never again.  I knew there was a good reason I don't buy rice ever.  

Get a rice cooker. It's like a toaster for rice. Takes 15-20mins.

The rice cooker instructions still include the bit about letting it soak for 30 min.  I swear, I've never had an even remotely acceptable experience cooking rice.

never soaked the rice. I put two cups of water, two cups of dried rice. Put down the little toaster lever. Sometimes I chuck broccoli on top half way and let it steam. Lever pops up like a toaster and that shit is done, son.

That sounds lovely.  This rice however is an even greater nightmare than I thought.  I did the soak thing - next step is to bring to a boil at medium heat, then reduce to a low heat and simmer for fucking 25 minutes.  THEN LET STAND FOR 15 MINUTES!!!  I'm not sure how I missed all this shit in the store, but I sure do want to shoot myself in the face now.

dang that sounds like some diva rice.

Throw away that rice.

get some basmati rice.

put a little oil on high heat in a pot.

toss a cup of the rice in. Roast a little while stirring.

toss a little less than 2 cups of water in it. add a little salt.

the ratio of water to rice is best if it’s like 1.8:1. 2:1 is fine too but 1.8:1 is better. reduce heat to minimum, put a lid on and let it sit 15 minutes. Deece af rice.

I had an EP's worth of material but it's on a faulty hard drive. My own damn fault because I carried it around too much

Instead of oil, can also use butter if you like butter (I like butter).

to recap:

roast some rice at high high heat

add water, close lid, reduce heat, do some other stuff for 15 minutes. Come back, enjoy good rice.