stupid first world problems you're dealing with

slow payer on ebay.  accepted the offer and sent the invoice and it's been an eternity of 1.5 hours and no payment received.  ;)

also, tumblr is changing it's policy and will no longer allow porn posts starting in a week or something. 

also, my dog is shedding and it's kinda insane and absurd. 

Isn't porn the only thing keeping tumblr alive these days?

Tumblr

stuck on the bus with like 15 uni/college girls. liquored up and all telling the same story to each other: my mom's so weird, my sister is pretty cool we drink wine together. i just drank vodka, eww, i know , right? i was gonna drink wine but, that guy is so funny, haha, 

i dunno, i just sat there listening to it all and i think i lost a couple brain cells.

shit, i should have got some numbers for flim..

How are you around the general public without headphones and music? I even keep a backup pair in my bag in case current ones break.

fwp: Current gf been nagging me to get a passport for the last 4-5 months (I've never owned an adult passport). Eventually the nagging succeeded and I bit the bullet. Did the online form, paid £90, then had 90 days to fill in some printouts, get some photos, get photos and form countersigned by someone and then post that off with my birth certificate.

If I don't send all that off within the 90 day time frame, they keep your money and you have to start back at square one.

I kinda slacked a bit but I eventually got the photos and the countersignature from my boss at work.

My birth certificate is usually always in a drawer inside a greetings card & envelope from when my Mum had to send it to me for a job when I was living in Somerset 15 years ago. Now I can't find it.

I go through all of the crap in my room over the course of a fortnight and it fails to turn up.

Then I remember I took it with me as ID when I was selling some records in a record store a few weeks back. Then I also remember when gf was over a week or so ago and took it upon herself to sort out all the various bits of paper, wageslips, magazines and other crap that had accumulated in the laptop slot of my backpack. At one point she found a load of xmas greetings cards and said "do you want these?" Me: (sat at computer not paying attention) "nah".

Fuck

So now I'm looking up how to order a new one online. Not this week though as it's a week before payday and I'm straight broke. Payday will be 30th of November and the deadline to get this passport application sent is end of December. Payday comes around, I register on this awful and difficult to navigate Gov site. I see that the replacement birth cert is £10 but will take 14 days to send out. OR there's an option to have it sent the day after you pay, but you have to pay £25.

Fuckit. I pay and then get on with other stuff I needed to do yesterday (my day off).

One thing I need to do is post out the tapes I've sold from my Bandcamp label. I have a pile of padded envelopes under my desk that I've received items in and am now reusing. The third one I pick to use is a small square one from Norman Records originally. I think "oh there's a bit of card in there already, handy as I don't need to cut some to size"

I'm sure you can imagine what it actually was :^)

Not two hours after pissing £25 away on another copy.

The feeling of being in a simulation and being fucked with by some omnipotent creator was very real.

After posting off the application I had to go for a very angry (&boozy) 2hr+ walk.

Why did you put it in a Norman Records package?

My father-in-law, for the last five days, has been doing his own version of an advent calendar. Except, instead of pieces of semi-digestible chocolate, imagine that you get text messages. Now, imagine those text messages are full of judeo-christian* self-righteousness, and this sort of smug self-satisfaction with the prose. Like, you can feel how much he took a look at what he's written and is going "gosh, I really am gonna bowl them over with how clever I am!" (which means, of course, that it smacks of artifice - also, I know what this looks like because I do it too. Not saying I'm exempt). 

What makes this particularly funny to me is that he's sending these LONG ASS stories/deep thoughts via text message. So he must be spending like 15 minutes or whatever just typing them out. Or, maybe, he types them our in Word and then copies and pastes into his phone? Anyway, best part was the other day he sent a text and THEN LIKED HIS OWN TEXT. You can't make this shit up. 

Anyway, I vacillate every day between being filled with dread when I feel my phone buzz and know another text is coming, and a giddy anticipation at reading these things. Also whether or not to post them to WATMM for your amusement/derision. 

*Disclaimer: given that his daughter does not identify as a Christian any more, and he was a pretty shitty dad who made holidays particularly shite, the irony of him trying push the "Christmas Spirit" makes it all the more excruciating 

Please start a thread with these texts, please....

please

your wish . . .

  On 12/6/2018 at 10:14 AM, hello spiral said:

How are you around the general public without headphones and music? I even keep a backup pair in my bag in case current ones break.

 

fwp: Current gf been nagging me to get a passport for the last 4-5 months (I've never owned an adult passport). Eventually the nagging succeeded and I bit the bullet. Did the online form, paid £90, then had 90 days to fill in some printouts, get some photos, get photos and form countersigned by someone and then post that off with my birth certificate.

If I don't send all that off within the 90 day time frame, they keep your money and you have to start back at square one.

I kinda slacked a bit but I eventually got the photos and the countersignature from my boss at work.

My birth certificate is usually always in a drawer inside a greetings card & envelope from when my Mum had to send it to me for a job when I was living in Somerset 15 years ago. Now I can't find it.

I go through all of the crap in my room over the course of a fortnight and it fails to turn up.

Then I remember I took it with me as ID when I was selling some records in a record store a few weeks back. Then I also remember when gf was over a week or so ago and took it upon herself to sort out all the various bits of paper, wageslips, magazines and other crap that had accumulated in the laptop slot of my backpack. At one point she found a load of xmas greetings cards and said "do you want these?" Me: (sat at computer not paying attention) "nah".

Fuck

So now I'm looking up how to order a new one online. Not this week though as it's a week before payday and I'm straight broke. Payday will be 30th of November and the deadline to get this passport application sent is end of December. Payday comes around, I register on this awful and difficult to navigate Gov site. I see that the replacement birth cert is £10 but will take 14 days to send out. OR there's an option to have it sent the day after you pay, but you have to pay £25.

Fuckit. I pay and then get on with other stuff I needed to do yesterday (my day off).

One thing I need to do is post out the tapes I've sold from my Bandcamp label. I have a pile of padded envelopes under my desk that I've received items in and am now reusing. The third one I pick to use is a small square one from Norman Records originally. I think "oh there's a bit of card in there already, handy as I don't need to cut some to size"

I'm sure you can imagine what it actually was :^)

Not two hours after pissing £25 away on another copy.

The feeling of being in a simulation and being fucked with by some omnipotent creator was very real.

After posting off the application I had to go for a very angry (&boozy) 2hr+ walk.

Is your life actually an IT Crowd extended series?

You need to jot these all down and create script for a mini-series. Seriously amazing.

Edit: just in case, i'm not taking the piss, this is seriously hilarious stuff.

  On 12/7/2018 at 8:09 PM, chenGOD said:

 

  On 12/6/2018 at 10:14 AM, hello spiral said:

How are you around the general public without headphones and music? I even keep a backup pair in my bag in case current ones break.

 

fwp: Current gf been nagging me to get a passport for the last 4-5 months (I've never owned an adult passport). Eventually the nagging succeeded and I bit the bullet. Did the online form, paid £90, then had 90 days to fill in some printouts, get some photos, get photos and form countersigned by someone and then post that off with my birth certificate.

If I don't send all that off within the 90 day time frame, they keep your money and you have to start back at square one.

I kinda slacked a bit but I eventually got the photos and the countersignature from my boss at work.

My birth certificate is usually always in a drawer inside a greetings card & envelope from when my Mum had to send it to me for a job when I was living in Somerset 15 years ago. Now I can't find it.

I go through all of the crap in my room over the course of a fortnight and it fails to turn up.

Then I remember I took it with me as ID when I was selling some records in a record store a few weeks back. Then I also remember when gf was over a week or so ago and took it upon herself to sort out all the various bits of paper, wageslips, magazines and other crap that had accumulated in the laptop slot of my backpack. At one point she found a load of xmas greetings cards and said "do you want these?" Me: (sat at computer not paying attention) "nah".

Fuck

So now I'm looking up how to order a new one online. Not this week though as it's a week before payday and I'm straight broke. Payday will be 30th of November and the deadline to get this passport application sent is end of December. Payday comes around, I register on this awful and difficult to navigate Gov site. I see that the replacement birth cert is £10 but will take 14 days to send out. OR there's an option to have it sent the day after you pay, but you have to pay £25.

Fuckit. I pay and then get on with other stuff I needed to do yesterday (my day off).

One thing I need to do is post out the tapes I've sold from my Bandcamp label. I have a pile of padded envelopes under my desk that I've received items in and am now reusing. The third one I pick to use is a small square one from Norman Records originally. I think "oh there's a bit of card in there already, handy as I don't need to cut some to size"

I'm sure you can imagine what it actually was :^)

Not two hours after pissing £25 away on another copy.

The feeling of being in a simulation and being fucked with by some omnipotent creator was very real.

After posting off the application I had to go for a very angry (&boozy) 2hr+ walk.

 

Is your life actually an IT Crowd extended series?

You need to jot these all down and create script for a mini-series. Seriously amazing.

Edit: just in case, i'm not taking the piss, this is seriously hilarious stuff.

 

Peep Show: the Next Generation.

^^ How about swimming as an exercise? heard it fucks yu up least

maybe there is a god fucking with you, maybe jordan peterson was right and tidy rooms pay off

  On 12/9/2018 at 11:38 AM, span said:

maybe there is a god fucking with you, maybe jordan peterson was right and tidy rooms pay off

My room is relatively organised. I usually can locate something easily. Hence my frustration at an item that has been in the same place for the last 15 years moving within a week of me needing it.

New fwp: sharted 5mins before I had to leave for work this morning. Had to waddle to bathroom and commence squatting over showerhead action. The bonus was the feeling of cleft+undercarraige freshness on subsequent walk to work. Penalty is there's now a beshitted pair of pyjama bottoms and cushion cover sitting in my dirty washing for the next 12-13hrs until I get home from work and can put them in machine.

I went to a vegan chicken place (temple of seitan) last sunday. We both got meals and I got a box of 'popcorn chicken' to share. Turns out that vegan chicken stuff is made from wheat gluten and it's heavy as fuck. You're basically eating a lump of brown bread deep fried and battered.

So we never ate the box of popcorn chicken and I took it to work on Monday. Yesterday, the following Saturday, I found it in the fridge here and ate it all.

Might be a factor

  On 12/9/2018 at 11:38 AM, span said:

maybe there is a god fucking with you, maybe jordan peterson was right and tidy rooms pay off

  On 12/9/2018 at 12:05 PM, hello spiral said:

You're basically eating a lump of brown bread deep fried and battered.

That's exactly what it looked like as well, was it horrible?

it was fine. But extremely heavy digesting. Felt like I was walking around pregnant with lead bowling ball for an hour afterwards.

there's an enormous huntsman spider lurking somewhere near my bed.

  On 12/9/2018 at 5:15 PM, usagi said:

there's an enormous huntsman spider lurking somewhere near my bed.

fuck that

  On 12/9/2018 at 12:25 PM, usagi said:

 

  On 12/9/2018 at 11:38 AM, span said:

maybe there is a god fucking with you, maybe jordan peterson was right and tidy rooms pay off

What's the robotic looking thing with wheels? A humanoid fax machine?

  On 12/9/2018 at 11:38 AM, Stickfigger said:

yeah swimming is good but quite difficult to actually get done right now... pools shut pretty early round here (6pm), and i can't go in the morning coz kids

Ain't u live on a big fookin island m9? :D

ye m9 just jump in the ocean from some cliff

  On 12/9/2018 at 11:30 AM, Stickfigger said:

Had some car accidents about 5 years ago ... upper back/ neck never been the same since. Feels pretty shit now and the more i exercise the worse it becomes. If i don't exercise, i will just become a fat bastard. If i take a bunch of anti inflammatories i end up with ulcery bullshit. Kinda tempted to take some benzos to see if this resolves the muscular elements but shii, i've done my dance with benzos as an idiot 20 year old - don't really want to re visit that.

So why not take opioids? If you only think of muscular then why not just take Muscular Relaxes (muscle relaxants)