I just came out

congrats mate, also great to have another queer at watmm :sup:

everybody take poppers and dance to house music

what a difficult situation to be in. i am curious though: as someone else mentioned, are you sure you're 100% attracted to men or just bi or what? cause, you know, it is a spectrum.

i'm sorry for you and i'm sorry for your wife. i hope everything works out as best as it possibly can.

have you had any actual homosexual experiences, yet? maybe the old standby, highway rest stops?

Congrats.

Of course she's very hurt by all this, but I hope that when the feelings aren't so raw she'll be able to support you in whatever lifestyle you want. Presumably you two were friends, after all.

But yeah, just make sure you are nothing but apologetic and nice to her.

Do you want the two of you to stay friends? How to you want this whole thing to work out?

  On 11/6/2011 at 9:04 AM, lumpenprol said:

quit beating around the bush and just give him your digits, Iain

but there's no bush to beat around.

Wow, lots of questions...

No sex with men yet, I'm positive it isn't theoretical, we can be friends still, she actually said that been there's no way she can beat it, she's dated gay man before (anyone calls her a fag-hag will be the first to make my ignore list, since I haven't used it yet), and we're still living together until I can get my trucking job back.

Lumps, as much as I may want to, and believe me, I don't think any gay guys suck dick thinking "at least I won't get a kid out of this...", I'm still waitig for her to process the shock. The theoretical thing is funny, though, since I probably wouldn't have been squirreling away pictures of men kissing, or naked, or having, or not having Bill Clinton sex.

  On 11/6/2011 at 5:53 PM, chenGOD said:

  On 11/6/2011 at 9:04 AM, lumpenprol said:

quit beating around the bush and just give him your digits, Iain

 

but there's no bush to beat around.

I've been beating off around the bush for five years. It's nothing new.

  On 11/6/2011 at 6:26 PM, Plum said:

The rest o of that post was supposed to express how impressed I am with a Rainbow Soapcat emoticon

lol

  On 11/6/2011 at 6:52 PM, Rambo said:

I am gay, also. Unfortunately i am unable to maintain an erection in the presence of men or even initial arousal by viewing gay pornography, so as you can imagine i find it extremely difficult to ejaculate at all as a gay man. I have intense dreams almost every night where women are touching my body and invariably i wake up covered in goo. I cant handle it. It has been an extremely testing couple of years for me.

You just need a real man. What you need is essines.

Finally someone more confused than I am...

could you reproduce the dialogue you established with her when you came out ?

babar posts a photo of himself looking all sexy and french and piff paff poof... we're all fag as fuck.

nice one babar!

  On 11/6/2011 at 6:56 PM, essines said:

You just need a real man. What you need is essines.

It would be amazing if someone could photoshop Essines onto a bottle of aftershave

it would be equally amazing if babar would stop queering us all up.

Congrats man.

I cant imagine the tricky situation you've been in. But I hope now that you've come out its been a load off your shoulders. I'm sure your relationship is pretty raw right now, but things change, time passes, and people heal.

I hope that your relationship with your wife survives because, regardless of physical attractions and sexual preferences, Im sure there must still be love and friendship between you both. I hope that, given time to adjust, she will be able to support you and be your friend.

Best of luck man, and massive congratulations.

  On 11/6/2011 at 7:11 PM, Rambo said:

  On 11/6/2011 at 6:56 PM, essines said:

You just need a real man. What you need is essines.

 

It would be amazing if someone could photoshop Essines onto a bottle of aftershave

It'd be like a bottle full of oxymoron.

  On 11/6/2011 at 8:46 AM, Iain C said:

Congrats mate, the rest of your life starts here. It's going to be tough on you and your wife for a while, but in the long run you're going to feel a lot better - and hopefully, so's she. You're not the first bloke to be in this situation by any means.

 

Right now, your wife is probably going to need some space. I suggest you give it to her while you work out what comes next.

 

Presumably you do love her, at least in a sense. When she's had some time to process the shock I suggest you emphasise that to her - that the role she played in your life wasn't just an interchangable beard, that the laughter and the good times you had together weren't fake, and that this is something you didn't necessarily realise the full extent of until you felt you had to come out.

 

Even if that's not all strictly true - I don't know your situation - it would be very kind of you to put it that way to her.

 

It's not going to be easy however it goes down, but don't forget the bright side here. You're about to discover who your real friends are, you're going to find out who truly loves you, and you're about to enjoy a freedom to live life the way you want which probably seemed a distant dream before. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that in a year's time, you're going to be happier than you've ever been. Good luck.

We are proud of you dude

  On 11/6/2011 at 7:03 PM, Babar said:

could you reproduce the dialogue you established with her when you came out ?

Me: I have something to tell you

Her: what?

Me: I can't say it.

Her: why?

(insert some more drinking, and other various question-dodging techniques for thirty minutes)

Me: I can't lie anymore.

Her: about what?

Me: I can't say it.

Her: what, you like men?

me: (sobbing) I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, my god, I'm so sorry...

  On 11/6/2011 at 7:13 PM, Plum said:

it would be equally amazing if babar would stop queering us all up.

I'm up for doing it, but only if you put some meat on some bone

fucking lol that's perfect packaging

Good thread.