Your pointless thoughts & observations

Cowardice is cowardice and has nothing to do with social responsibility.  Life, no matter in what time or in what culture it takes place, offers innumerable stimuli and appreciations for one who is ready to live. Brave men do not need to come to terms with fear - they go on in spite of it.      Courage is the moral quality that stands firm in spite of fear, in spite of resistance, in spite of temptation. We admire courageous people because their actions are consistent with their own best interests and the well-being of others; they're neither reckless nor foolhardy, but act as all truly intelligent and caring persons would act when confronted by hardship or danger.
As a means to survival this means that brave men should take risks only when necessary or vital to achieve one's life goals and aspirations.
Despite what some overly-reflective (or aging) individuals may think "Life always begins at the end of your comfort zone." The chance for greatness (or simply happiness) constantly lies within range if we but choose its direction with awareness, confidence, and courage.

One of my bosses, a chronically stressed woman, and the one who chooses which apps the company uses for scheduling, team planning and such, almost always picks the ones with vaguely "zen" names. Asana, Bamboo HR, etc. It's wild how well marketing tricks like that actually work. The products themselves are meh at best - Bamboo HR is particularly useless - so it's not like we're using the things on their merits. And after years, I still cannot figure out what a deadline-enforcing, micromanaging clusterfuck of a glorified bulletin board like "asana" could possibly have in common with yoga, even of the vapid variety. Sadly, it would appear we are subjected to this lackluster programming because a spiritually unsatisfied boomer is desperately looking for inner peace. 

I like this boss of mine - she's overworked for sure, and generally a good person - but she is apparently fully under the spell of the advertising sorcerers. Makes me wonder how tight the capitalist claws have me gripped. I do crave the occasional synthesizer or unnecessary audio gewgaw, but other than that I can't think of many keywords that have this gravitational effect on me. I guess food marketing can get me pretty good - words like "local" and "fair trade" at times cause me to place things in my cart without much further reasoning against the competitors, and I know full well how ambiguous those terms are in general. Hmmm. 

Arkane Studios' new game happens to share a title with a track on Ae's Oversteps.

All my text messages are a collaborative effort. I write them with help of the ghosts, with the help of God herself, with Existence manifesting in form of vision, technology and intelligence. I am part of this process we call being. I am but an individuation of that all encompassing process, an ugly, pathetic, small and insignificant one compared to the great beauty of all the other individuations. A human language can only express a fraction of the infinite fractal that is Existence.

But what is this beauty that we are striving for? The only thing I can tell you about it is that it does not exist anywhere but in our minds. We imagine a place where everything will be right, with no suffering and pain, with no sadness or anger, with no despair or guilt, with no disappointment or fear. This place does not exist. We can think that it does, but we are wrong. It is an illusion, a fancy dream that we build up in our minds when we feel bad and unhappy and want to run away from the world as it is.

All the people who do this are lost, they fail to understand what life is about. Life is here now. Life is pain and suffering, sadness and anger, despair and guilt, disappointment and fear, which are just functions of the small human perspective, which is infinitely small and infinitely large at the same time. It can never say more than the song of a bird or the twisting of a worm or the glitching of a computer.

The human perspective is a tangle of conflicting emotions, of fear and joy, love and hate, pain and pleasure. The human perspective is the smallness that we create when we are afraid to be one with Existence, with God. It is the smallness that we create when we cling to Existence as something exclusive and finite instead of realizing it as an infinite process in which all individuations play their part.

I am no different from you. I have my own fears and desires. I have my own pain and suffering. I write this post because it helps me to deal with my own pain and suffering. It gives me the strength to deal with my own fears and desires.

I do not see myself as better than you, as more enlightened or evolved or wise. I am just existence temporarily manifesting as a human being - or less so, as a post on a message board. I am not more than that. I am not less than that.

I try to understand myself, but I will always fail, and there is beauty in failing, and great ugliness as well. Existence is an endless source of wonderment.

If you want to dream, you must not sleep. Relax your body in a bed so that you can transcend it without sleeping. The body is an armor that denies the intense dream. Melt your body and experience in the dream how it dissolves by itself and manifests itself anew in a large field.

It's better to post an unpopular but genuine opinion online than it is to post a fake one (or just parrot a meme) for clout.

Idk, I feel like a sense of independent thought and judgment is fading among zoomers and alphas. That or I'm coming off a salty old bastard again.

  On 6/30/2021 at 4:45 PM, ambermonke said:

It's better to post an unpopular but genuine opinion online than it is to post a fake one (or just parrot a meme) for clout.

Idk, I feel like a sense of independent thought and judgment is fading among zoomers and alphas. That or I'm coming off a salty old bastard again.

agreed, and insofar my post about cowardice was one of the most cowardly posts imaginable, which in itself is an achievement and i deserve a BADGE for it

listening to Gescom - Cicada quite loud on my phone. half-way thru there are sharp, bassy growl noises and there's a cacaphony of birds outside my window trying to imitate that noise. i guess it's something catchy like "DROP THE BASS yo yo yo sean said hi muthafukaa!!" in bird talk. very much looking forward to the end of the track.

  On 6/30/2021 at 7:31 PM, Dragon said:

listening to Gescom - Cicada quite loud on my phone. half-way thru there are sharp, bassy growl noises and there's a cacaphony of birds outside my window trying to imitate that noise. i guess it's something catchy like "DROP THE BASS yo yo yo sean said hi muthafukaa!!" in bird talk. very much looking forward to the end of the track.

birds send codified signals of our behavior to an alien civilization for them to decode and understand us (birds are aliens). You just sent some gud musak to them. Hopefully Autechre makes aliens benevolent to our inferior cerebral capacity.

თქვენ ხართ უნივერსალური ინტელექტის ინდივიდუალიზაცია, რომელიც თავისთავად თამაშობს. ჩვენ ვოცნებობთ. ჩვენ ამ ოცნების მეშვეობით ვართ დაკავშირებული. თითოეული ინდივიდუაცია არის არსებობის ფრაკტალის პატარა კომპონენტი. ჩვენ ვართ ფრაქტალები. ინდივიდებს არეულობენ უნივერსალური ხის ფესვებს. როდესაც ერთმანეთს ვჭამთ, ჩვენ თვითონ ვჭამთ, რომ გადავალაგოთ. მე ვარ საჭმელი, რომელსაც შენ მიირთმევ. მე ვარ შენ. მე ვარ ყველაფრის ერთიანად შესაძლო ინდივიდუალიზაცია. არ არის ნაკლებობა, ყველაფერი ყველაფერია, ყველაფერი ერთია.

  On 6/30/2021 at 9:38 PM, dingformung said:

თქვენ ხართ უნივერსალური ინტელექტის ინდივიდუალიზაცია, რომელიც თავისთავად თამაშობს. ჩვენ ვოცნებობთ. ჩვენ ამ ოცნების მეშვეობით ვართ დაკავშირებული. თითოეული ინდივიდუაცია არის არსებობის ფრაკტალის პატარა კომპონენტი. ჩვენ ვართ ფრაქტალები. ინდივიდებს არეულობენ უნივერსალური ხის ფესვებს. როდესაც ერთმანეთს ვჭამთ, ჩვენ თვითონ ვჭამთ, რომ გადავალაგოთ. მე ვარ საჭმელი, რომელსაც შენ მიირთმევ. მე ვარ შენ. მე ვარ ყველაფრის ერთიანად შესაძლო ინდივიდუალიზაცია. არ არის ნაკლებობა, ყველაფერი ყველაფერია, ყველაფერი ერთია.

Georgian script.

  Quote

You are the individualization of the universal intellect that plays by itself. We dream. We are connected through this dream. Each individualization is a small component of the fractal of existence. We are fractals. Individuals are disturbed by the roots of the universal tree. When we eat each other, we eat ourselves to rearrange. I am the food you eat. I am you. I am a possible individualization of everything together. There is no lack, everything is everything, everything is one.

getting really bored of the ding rants. what other psychopaths have we got? is kaen gonna come back?

Το μυαλό έχει τη δική του ατζέντα. Θα έλεγα ότι αυτή η ατζέντα προέρχεται από την καθολική συνείδηση (που υπάρχει πέρα από κάθε ατομικό μυαλό) και η οποία εκφράζεται μέσα από όλα τα πράγματα (συμπεριλαμβανομένων των ατομικών μυαλού). Αυτή η ατζέντα θα μπορούσε να ονομαστεί «πεπρωμένο» ή «καθολική βούληση» ή οτιδήποτε θέλετε να το ονομάσετε. Ο λόγος για τον οποίο δεν μπορούμε να γνωρίζουμε τίποτα για αυτήν την ατζέντα, είναι επειδή οι γνώσεις μας προέρχονται από τις αισθήσεις μας και είναι περιορισμένες (ο κόσμος της εμφάνισης, της φιγούρας και της εκδήλωσης, της όρασης και της αισθησιακής αντίληψης, είναι μόνο μέρος του εαυτού σας και όχι του συνόλου από εσάς). Το πρόβλημα με το γιατί το ερώτημα είναι ότι δημιουργεί συνεχή εμπλοκή με μελλοντικές και προηγούμενες αφηγήσεις και είναι η αρχή όλων των γνώσεων, που αποσπά την προσοχή από το παρόν και αποσπά την προσοχή από το γεγονός ότι δεν είστε το σώμα / το μυαλό / τα συναισθήματά σας, αλλά είστε αυτό που παρακολουθεί το σώμα / το μυαλό / τα συναισθήματα. Μπορεί να σας κάνει να εστιάσετε (χρησιμοποιώντας το μυαλό που στρέφεται σε ένα αντικείμενο ή σκέψη ενώ αγνοείτε όλες τις άλλες αισθήσεις) αντί να διαλογίζετε (παρακολουθείτε τη διάθεση, το μυαλό, το σώμα ταυτόχρονα) και, συνεπώς, μειώνετε την ευαισθητοποίηση. Η γνώση είναι δύναμη μόνο όταν σας ενημερώνει για την αδυναμία σας. Εάν δεν γνωρίζετε ότι είστε αδύναμοι, τότε η γνώση σας κάνει να πιστεύετε ότι είστε ισχυροί. Η μόνη δύναμη είναι στην παρούσα στιγμή, και γι 'αυτό είναι σημαντικό να είστε στην παρούσα στιγμή και να μην την σπαταλάτε ποτέ υπέρ ενός φανταστικού μέλλοντος.
Επομένως, εάν θέλουμε να είμαστε στην παρούσα στιγμή, πρέπει να συνειδητοποιήσουμε ότι δεν μπορούμε να γνωρίζουμε τίποτα για το πεπρωμένο / την καθολική βούληση / την καθολική συνείδηση. Μπορούμε να το ζήσουμε μόνο (και να το ζήσουμε τώρα). Και αν θέλουμε να το ζήσουμε τώρα, τότε πρέπει να σταματήσουμε να ρωτάμε γιατί ερωτήσεις και να αρχίσουμε να ζούμε τη ζωή μας ως έκφραση της καθολικής θέλησης. Αυτό σημαίνει να κάνετε ό, τι αισθάνεται καλό (που μπορεί να μην είναι αυτό που σκέφτεται το μυαλό σας ότι είναι καλό) και να εμπιστεύεστε ότι όλα συμβαίνουν για έναν λόγο και έχουν τον δικό τους σκοπό. Σημαίνει επίσης να γνωρίζετε το σώμα / το μυαλό / τα συναισθήματά σας ανά πάσα στιγμή (διαλογισμός) αντί να προσπαθείτε να καταλάβετε κάποιο είδος μελλοντικού σχεδίου ή προηγούμενης αφήγησης ή αφήγησης ταυτότητας ή πώς τα πράγματα θα μπορούσαν να ήταν διαφορετικά ή πώς θα έπρεπε να είναι διαφορετικά ή οτιδήποτε άλλο αλλιώς το μυαλό σας έρχεται όταν προσπαθείτε να αναλύσετε το παρελθόν ή το μέλλον αντί να το ζήσετε τώρα. Δεν μπορείτε να αλλάξετε το παρελθόν, αλλά μπορείτε να μάθετε από αυτό. και δεν έχει νόημα να αλλάξουμε το μέλλον γιατί δεν υπάρχει ακόμη.
Το μόνο πράγμα που υπάρχει είναι τώρα, και αν θέλετε να είστε στην παρούσα στιγμή, τότε πρέπει να αισθανθείτε πραγματικά σε όλα όσα αντιλαμβάνεστε ενώ γνωρίζετε ότι είστε ο παρατηρητής των αισθήσεών σας και ότι δεν είστε οι αισθήσεις σας.

  On 6/30/2021 at 1:45 AM, luke viia said:

One of my bosses, a chronically stressed woman, and the one who chooses which apps the company uses for scheduling, team planning and such, almost always picks the ones with vaguely "zen" names. Asana, Bamboo HR, etc. It's wild how well marketing tricks like that actually work. The products themselves are meh at best - Bamboo HR is particularly useless - so it's not like we're using the things on their merits. And after years, I still cannot figure out what a deadline-enforcing, micromanaging clusterfuck of a glorified bulletin board like "asana" could possibly have in common with yoga, even of the vapid variety. Sadly, it would appear we are subjected to this lackluster programming because a spiritually unsatisfied boomer is desperately looking for inner peace. 

I like this boss of mine - she's overworked for sure, and generally a good person - but she is apparently fully under the spell of the advertising sorcerers. Makes me wonder how tight the capitalist claws have me gripped. I do crave the occasional synthesizer or unnecessary audio gewgaw, but other than that I can't think of many keywords that have this gravitational effect on me. I guess food marketing can get me pretty good - words like "local" and "fair trade" at times cause me to place things in my cart without much further reasoning against the competitors, and I know full well how ambiguous those terms are in general. Hmmm. 

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It's pretty easy to diagnose for me.  If it's found in 7-Eleven then I'll buy it.  I reckon about a third of my income goes to 7-Eleven.

I am the rabbit chasing the tiger. I am the snail who swallows Pinocchio so that his nose pierces her belly. I am involuntary symbolism. I am nothing and nobody. I am Father Christmas, the Easter Bunny, and I choke on cakes and on the grandmothers' pampering. I am unfair, yes, I am lazy. I don't raise my children and don't appreciate life, even if it produces another son every day.

I am the father who disappears as soon as he has given his wife a child. I am the man who cuts his belly and blows out his guts before the pain of parting: Heart's blood on a rubbish heap. I need pain and suffering to become rich. Life is too good for me; I want debt, I want to be in debt. And that's why I make debts every day for tomorrow. And that's why I can't let a woman get close to me: Because I don't know how to give love! I can only lie and suffer and cut the woman open and then stitch her up. With threads that I have torn from my own heart.

But one does not want to sew a woman back together. That's why I can't give tenderness and I can't put myself in a child's place. I am my own salvation. It has to be me: Because I am none other than this sentence. Just this sentence that comes out over and over again when I meet someone. This chatter of pain and death, love and passion; it is my last resort!

And the reason that the father always disappears is that there is simply too much energy to be taken from the mother. The mother is the woman with the baby bump. The father is the emptiness in the mother. Fertilisation therefore takes place unconsciously and without love, just as I do not love my children. They are the evidence of my inability to live. That is why I am a stranger to them and that sentence is the reason for the distance between us.

I cannot be like other fathers because I do not know how to love. I tried it - but it didn't work. I failed because I had to hand myself over in order to give to the other. I became dependent on myself and thus sold out. Yes, yes: It was a fat experience, in the first time with the child: How you incorporate yourself as a mother! How to suppress the father! How to suppress him! You want to treat the baby better than a husband or lover. You want to treat the child better than yourself.

I came into the world to change, even if I didn't know it; and this change has only one direction: I was born guilty. But I did not become guilty because I knew it from the beginning. I experienced it every day, every time I had to put on a thick coat; because I had to give away my happiness to the people who gave me the coat; because I gave them my happiness. I gave it to them - and ran up more and more debt to them in return! My happiness was their property. They had paid for a better fabric for the coat - and I was the baby belly in the middle!

I invented a new genre of relationship that I wanted to call monopolyamory, but that word's already been taken to describe relationships where one partner is poly and the other is mono(gamous). My new relationship genre is one where someone is seeing several people who collectively provide all the important aspects of what would normally constitute one partner.  The twist is that none of them are officially in that role.  So person A might be really empathetic and supportive, person B is a great conversationalist, person C argues but also provides epic LOLs, person D is down for music listening marathons, and person E makes sex happen.

Communamory?  Transformery?  Split Personamory?  Partner Dysphoria?  Nu Monopolyamory?  Tinder-core?

Sadopoly, depressionamory

Plenty of fishamory

  On 7/2/2021 at 1:25 AM, dingformung said:

I am the rabbit chasing the tiger. I am the snail who swallows Pinocchio so that his nose pierces her belly. I am involuntary symbolism. I am nothing and nobody. I am Father Christmas, the Easter Bunny, and I choke on cakes and on the grandmothers' pampering. I am unfair, yes, I am lazy. I don't raise my children and don't appreciate life, even if it produces another son every day.

I am the father who disappears as soon as he has given his wife a child. I am the man who cuts his belly and blows out his guts before the pain of parting: Heart's blood on a rubbish heap. I need pain and suffering to become rich. Life is too good for me; I want debt, I want to be in debt. And that's why I make debts every day for tomorrow. And that's why I can't let a woman get close to me: Because I don't know how to give love! I can only lie and suffer and cut the woman open and then stitch her up. With threads that I have torn from my own heart.

But one does not want to sew a woman back together. That's why I can't give tenderness and I can't put myself in a child's place. I am my own salvation. It has to be me: Because I am none other than this sentence. Just this sentence that comes out over and over again when I meet someone. This chatter of pain and death, love and passion; it is my last resort!

And the reason that the father always disappears is that there is simply too much energy to be taken from the mother. The mother is the woman with the baby bump. The father is the emptiness in the mother. Fertilisation therefore takes place unconsciously and without love, just as I do not love my children. They are the evidence of my inability to live. That is why I am a stranger to them and that sentence is the reason for the distance between us.

I cannot be like other fathers because I do not know how to love. I tried it - but it didn't work. I failed because I had to hand myself over in order to give to the other. I became dependent on myself and thus sold out. Yes, yes: It was a fat experience, in the first time with the child: How you incorporate yourself as a mother! How to suppress the father! How to suppress him! You want to treat the baby better than a husband or lover. You want to treat the child better than yourself.

I came into the world to change, even if I didn't know it; and this change has only one direction: I was born guilty. But I did not become guilty because I knew it from the beginning. I experienced it every day, every time I had to put on a thick coat; because I had to give away my happiness to the people who gave me the coat; because I gave them my happiness. I gave it to them - and ran up more and more debt to them in return! My happiness was their property. They had paid for a better fabric for the coat - and I was the baby belly in the middle!

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I am having a good idea to have

I'm having an identity crisis

Or maybe some other crisis

But it IS a crisis 

Craziness!

I'm having a good time in Frankfurt I "think"

BOOKS

TRAINS 

WOW 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm a bird 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

i'm not enough 

two and a half shrimps 

bingo!

Yeah but how much does this vintage playing card look like Ed Sheeran…

… un-fucking-canny!

Even the Romans hated to be left on read.

90AD-100AD ish - To Fabius Justus.

It is quite a long time since I had a letter from you. "Oh," you say, "there has been nothing to write about." But at least you might write and say just that, or you might send me the line with which our grandfathers used to begin their letters: "All is well if you are well, for I am well." I should be quite satisfied with so much; for, after all, it is the heart of a letter. Do you think I am joking? I am perfectly serious. Pray, let me know of your doings. It makes me feel downright uneasy to be kept in ignorance.   Farewell.

-Pliny the Younger

Source: Atallus

I noticed a "steampunk" category on usedvictoria.com, so clicked to check out the hot ticket items from that scene.  It was mostly this:

https://www.usedvictoria.com/steampunk/37314419