hey i'm tired of being shy

So I'm tired of being cooped up in the house all day and literally not getting sunlight for weeks upon weeks. I went through my second half of highschool and all 7 years of college without friends or real-life contacts other than classmates and occasional tabletop RPGing with other equally inept people.

Assuming there's some modicum of benefit in meeting people and making friends, where would I go in a town like mine (tons of homeless people, rednecks and a meth epidemic, and only downtown clubs are of people who think they're punk along with grungies who still think it's 1990) and how would I make interesting conversation that doesn't involve my nerdy banter, obsession with porn, and videogame fanboyism (which are three things that bore everyone to death)?

Is faking interest in other people an inevitability in this "social" thing you people do?

internets

Just go to a party and find someone that might be cool and start talking to that person. Really about it I think.

Don't you have to be invited to parties or somehow otherwise be "in the know" of said parties at least existing, which thus requires previous amounts of social networking?

dewd, everybody plays video games these days. and it's not so nerdy anymore to talk about tech stuff.

sorta.

yeah, just get out to all kinds of social gatherings or whatever... try and meet someone who can hook you up...once you got one or two hookups, parties come easier and you can meet all kinds of folk there. it's basically a struggle any way you slice, don't look for an eeasy way out.

ive always been social. i wouldnt know where to start if i wasnt. but i sometimes meet people by smoking weed. you smoke and you always meet others that do, no matter where you are. then they become friends and you smoke all their weed. haha

i used to be so shy that i couldn't talk to the friends i had if i saw them in public by chance unless they first acknowledged me.

wots the point .. of being social again .. ?? ... well other than on the internet .... i get all the human interaction i need doing customer service at work ...

but if you really wanna break the cycle of your own lil lifes drama .. well being gregarious doesn't just happen it's something you need to grow into innit ... it helps if you're naturally funny ... don't care what other people have to say (confident) .. and seek out groups of people with some common point of interest ... well that latter one only matters if you want to persue some sort of ongoing friendship that for you doesn't involve being quietly frustrated by the lack of commonality between and your chosen fellows .. subhuman slop that they be .. -sie- ..

stop being a pussy and ask her on a date

stop being an erd

There's no point in making friends. Fuck everyone. Stay at home for the rest of your life. You'll be much happier.

  lion said:

stop being an erd

what's an erd?

Um okay so let's pretend I find a place full of people. There's a few large groups of people talking to each other who seem to all know each other, a few small groups of people talking to each other who also seem to all know each other, and a few couples.

Which should I approach?

And then any of them'll notice an unknown face among their ranks and they ask "who the hell are you? get out of our business" or whatever normally happens?

stop playing rpg games and try listening o drum and bass, usually chicks that listen to gabber and drum and bass are willing to put out

If you really want to disrupt what you have now, then I guess just go hang out at social places or whatever. Bars 'n' shit. I dunno. I'm just as socially inept as you are.

  my usernames always really suck said:

Um okay so let's pretend I find a place full of people. There's a few large groups of people talking to each other who seem to all know each other, a few small groups of people talking to each other who also seem to all know each other, and a few couples.

 

Which should I approach?

 

And then any of them'll notice an unknown face among their ranks and they ask "who the hell are you? get out of our business" or whatever normally happens?

well look for someone you might know, if not look for the lonliest group of people around and ask some trivial questions and you may have success.

yes and go to drum and bass gigs ...

it's weird .. some customer declared to me that she was moving to england for 3 years in two months .. with an odd silence from her precding and after she declared that to me the other night ... she's been sweet on me for a couple of years now .. and i feel this was like her ultimatum to me to ask her out ... so when i didn't bother .. she looked really frustrated ... she said a few things .. then left .. only to return like a few minuits later ... acting kinda grumpy but with a sad look in her eye ....

poor dear ...

she's a nice girl .. but seriously this is dleetr we're talking about .. what was she thinking !! ...

look into escorts

get some confidence in yourself or die alone and scared of everything

Go to your local pub trivia night. Really.

Don't try, just do. I have had three friends since the 6th grade. Fewer close friends are better. Then stick out enough to get invited to social gatherings and drink all the kool aid.

Don't do anything you would feel terrible about. You might also think about medication. I take antidepressants so that I can stay awake and move. And no mo R Pee Gees.

  lion said:

get some confidence in yourself or die alone and scared of everything

What's confidence, anyway? Don't I need some amount of previous success to back it up? Like, does confidence come from success, or does success come from confidence? Because the latter, if true, it still feels fake cockiness.

I'm a tubby, longhaired Jeff Lebowski looking fucker without a job and I look like a horny faggot when I smile at anyone. I also tend to unknowingly stare like a creepy homeless man in a trance during conversations, probably due to doing nothing but playing videogames where I likewise stare at the monitor in said fashion for hours upon hours.

You'll find that what you percieve isn't what's being conveyed to the other end of the conversation. No one's going to look at you while you're talking to them and think "that guy's staring at me like a creepy homeless man in a trance." Don't worry about it so much.

look into adderall and shaving

you'll slim down and will have no problem going up to anyone and talking