hey i'm tired of being shy

  my usernames always really suck said:

  lion said:

get some confidence in yourself or die alone and scared of everything

or does success come from confidence? Because the latter, if true, it still feels fake cockiness.

 

 

yes

you should prolly go to a psychologist cus you have major self-image issues and no one on a electronic music message board will be able to help you

  Thisket said:

Don't try, just do. I have had three friends since the 6th grade. Fewer close friends are better. Then stick out enough to get invited to social gatherings and drink all the kool aid.

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Don't do anything you would feel terrible about. You might also think about medication. I take antidepressants so that I can stay awake and move. And no mo R Pee Gees.

No medication ever again, I think the dexies I took through highschool and college to keep awake and alert probably had some hand in this. Every time I was under the influence of it, I had this paranoid feeling that every single person within my line of sight was looking at and strutinizing me. Maybe alcohol is a suitable drug, of course, but I need to develop a taste for it. And I've gotten bored with RPGs so that's no problem... I've recently discovered shmups, way too late in my life. Now those test your reflexes and decision making!

^^Yeah, the hell you asking us for?

Because when I asked for advice on 4chan all I got were pictures of muddy dicks and cats being lit on fire.

4chan? that explains everything.

Well, dexies are uppers. I take lexapro, which doesn't do anything except fix my chemical imbalance. If I overdose a little, I clean my house.

You need to develop a good attitude of not caring. Really - NO ONE CARES. That's why everyone's on their cell phones. Life is just a test. If it turns out there's no God, then at least you lived life unconcerned.

Video games... I suggest string figures and origami. Those are much more fun and cheaper, plus with origami, you getto carry around birds in your pocket & stuff.

Maybe something good for you is to ride a bike naked. I do that sometimes.

No alcohol. That's just low-class.

i second the weed smoking thing...met most of my friends that way.

also what's wrong with hanging with nerdy rpg'ers...some of them must have some social contacts and go from there...go to bigger gatherings of nerdy rpger's and as the crowd grows larger the chance of finding "social" and even girls are greater...also don't care what others might think of you..be yourself

i am a shy person, but it's not that hard to meet new ppl...

i've found a good way to meat girls is by raping them

mo

seconded

  my usernames always really suck said:

So I'm tired of being cooped up in the house all day and literally not getting sunlight for weeks upon weeks. I went through my second half of highschool and all 7 years of college without friends or real-life contacts other than classmates and occasional tabletop RPGing with other equally inept people.

 

Assuming there's some modicum of benefit in meeting people and making friends, where would I go in a town like mine (tons of homeless people, rednecks and a meth epidemic, and only downtown clubs are of people who think they're punk along with grungies who still think it's 1990) and how would I make interesting conversation that doesn't involve my nerdy banter, obsession with porn, and videogame fanboyism (which are three things that bore everyone to death)?

 

Is faking interest in other people an inevitability in this "social" thing you people do?

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I'm a tubby, longhaired Jeff Lebowski looking fucker without a job and I look like a horny faggot when I smile at anyone. I also tend to unknowingly stare like a creepy homeless man in a trance during conversations, probably due to doing nothing but playing videogames where I likewise stare at the monitor in said fashion for hours upon hours.

holy shit lol! extremely good and refreshing honesty! hooray for planetoid!

but yes; drugs are sort of an easy way to make friends, or at least to hang out with people, but this has lots of negative side effects. there's no point in trying to go out to clubs or whatever bullshit, you wouldn't meet the sort of people you'd want to hang out with there, anyway.

as for how to make interesting conversation; there's no point in trying to fake 'being interesting,' or to try to develop random interests that you don't really care about. you're very funny, if nothing else (on the interweb, at any rate), and everyone likes a funny person.

but yeah it's fairly simple ... if you don't have longtime childhood/high school/college friends, you only have two real options (i'm leaving out all the fantastical options that won't actually get results). find friends at your place of work, or where you go to school; as far as i recall you're out of college and weren't a huge fan of college, so, i'd suggest co-workers. you already have at least something in common, and you probably already know some of them fairly well; surely you can find at least a couple interesting people where you work, and then branch out from there

edit: hmm, let me revise that ... you'd need to get a job first! lol

and like essines said, it won't be easy either way, there's no point in bullshitting yourself

friends from work !! ... that would be desperation .. hah ..

well at my work at any rate ...

if everyone from watmm lived in the same town .. this shit would be easy for the planet duder ... i wouldn't let him on my new couch though .. well until he's had a shave n'washed his clothes n'shit .. heh ;-]

I think I had a chance to meet SPD or someone a couple years ago where I previously lived in Valencia California, but I got super bashful when he mentioned we lived in the same town. :embrassed: :

go to the doctor or live miserably forever

sup my usernames always really suck

just make a myspace profile. wait one week and suddenly you've 10.000 friends.

is the doctor gonna introduce you to new people .. ?? ... i'm not a bog fan of medication ... first step is self help .. through self realization ...

no but they'll help you discover why you act the way you do in the first place and what you can do about it

or you can just not do anything and rot and stagnate

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or you can just not do anything and rot and stagnate

that seems like the most sensible plan to me.

sorry my usernames always really suck.

you think too much. don't think, just do it. sometimes i've the same sort of problem. i just think too much with everything i do. very annoying!

so again: don't think, just do it.

  Donut said:

i second the weed smoking thing...met most of my friends that way.

also what's wrong with hanging with nerdy rpg'ers...some of them must have some social contacts and go from there...go to bigger gatherings of nerdy rpger's and as the crowd grows larger the chance of finding "social" and even girls are greater...also don't care what others might think of you..be yourself

i am a shy person, but it's not that hard to meet new ppl...

i think donut's got some good advice. even in the 'nerdy-rpger' scene, you can surely make friends there and meet new people.

  Ron Manager said:

  Donut said:

i second the weed smoking thing...met most of my friends that way.

also what's wrong with hanging with nerdy rpg'ers...some of them must have some social contacts and go from there...go to bigger gatherings of nerdy rpger's and as the crowd grows larger the chance of finding "social" and even girls are greater...also don't care what others might think of you..be yourself

i am a shy person, but it's not that hard to meet new ppl...

i think donut's got some good advice. even in the 'nerdy-rpger' scene, you can surely make friends there and meet new people.

yeah he has. but not to be a sort of father-figure but "smoking weed for making friends" is not a good idea imho. there're plenty of other social activities you can do. and yeah what IS wrong with hanging with rpg'ers? nothing mate.

Just get a job. That's always a good way to meet people. I haven't had a job for a few years but I made some good friends through shelf stacking and shit.

But also you'll probably just end up with loads of people that you don't especially like, you only like them because they're the only people you know, and they probably don't particularly like you either and won't invite you to everything they do and then you'll feel left out and betrayed.

I don't understand why it's so bad being a geek, if your friends with people because you both share an interest in computer games then whats the problem?

Get a fucking job, simple as. I don't mind talking to a random in a bar but if they said they didn't have a job and that there interests were computers and RPG's I would quickly make my excuses.

Friends from work isn't a bad thing, I leave on Friday and have made 15 quality mates that I will miss, and plan on keeping in contact with. Admittedly there will be 20 or so people that are complete cocks but it's not all bad.

  lion said:

no but they'll help you discover why you act the way you do in the first place and what you can do about it

 

or you can just not do anything and rot and stagnate

Yes, social anxiety is a terrible thing but it can be overcome

  my usernames always really suck said:

tabletop RPGing

that explains everything

im quite impressed that you posted this on this forum, compared to the style of the rest of your posts, i feel well sorry for people who dont have that many friends

weed, and then get a job at the biggest supermarket near you, and just ignore shyness, walk straight up to people and tell them your new and want somebody to chat to.

but weed, yeah, i have about 70-80 people round my town that i could ring up and go and sit off with just because we have a common interest in the drug, and then about 10-15 close friends

ive just quit weed though so now ive just 10 to 15 close firends heh.

go the gym twice a week too.