Movies That Totally Suck!

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:04 AM, sneaksta303 said:

  On 11/10/2009 at 2:39 AM, chris moss acid said:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ISXiFJS9D5A

 

dude this shouldn't be here in this thread. this is on a whole 'nuther plane.

the room is a borken mess of a masterpiece

oh hi mark.

movies that i've recently seen that sucked hard were Ultraviolet *shudder* (such a shitty film), Dead Silence (c'mon....really? seriously?), and The Day the Earth Stood Still remake (I saw that one coming from a mile away but my family wanted to see it badly so...)

mister lonely.

Daylight.

Seriously, the fuck do I ever want my eyes to witness that again.

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:20 AM, Calx Sherbet said:

flash gordon

flash gordon?! That's a classic, if you saw it as a kid. Left me with more indelible memories than probably any other childhood film...of course it sucks but that's not the point...

The Last Samurai

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:07 AM, jefferoo said:

  On 11/10/2009 at 2:19 AM, troon said:

  On 11/8/2009 at 6:52 AM, zaphod said:

good, i hope donnie darko guy never makes another movie

 

 

for shits. a one hit wonder for sure. i hope he's not, but it looks that way...

'south land tail's was a fucking chore.

 

i did not see this box of shit. should i start a thread called 'movies that totally suck'

to go along with my 'albums that totally suck'?

 

Nobody said yes.

it was just a logical progression, sorry to impose.

i mean no harm

The Boondock Saints

blair witch project

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:22 AM, lumpenprol said:

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:20 AM, Calx Sherbet said:

flash gordon

 

flash gordon?! That's a classic, if you saw it as a kid. Left me with more indelible memories than probably any other childhood film...of course it sucks but that's not the point...

you might be right, in fact i bet you are right. it must need that nostalgic hook

Crash

Hard to believe this pile of shit won an oscar.

  On 11/10/2009 at 2:38 AM, Drahken said:

Choke

 

Not that bad I guess, but did they even read the book to the end? The ending of the movie was a serious WTF.

Is the book worth it? I saw the movie and even though I don't remember it, I remember not liking it much.

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:33 AM, chaosmachine said:

blair witch project

TOTALLY.

oh my lord, i can't believe how long this took me.....

The 3rd and 4th texas chainsaw massacre films. these almost need a thread of there own to serve as a monument of how horrible they are. i'd also say the 2nd one, but i bet some would say it's a cult classic (i hated it). but they totally blow. especially the 4th, that was such a lazily made movie. it was like watching a bag of rotting garbage spin in a washing machine.

I liked "The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (1994), just saw the rating on imdb lol.

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:31 AM, dr lopez said:

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:08 AM, data said:

grizzly man is a fucking fantastic film. It made me laugh and cry at the same time and I left feeling like I had experienced both man and animal as well as nature at their most extremes. I'm am a dolt and Werner Herzog has more talent and creativity in his fingernail than I could ever dream of containing in my pathetic faculties.

but now that we're on herzog, rescue dawn was fucking pathetic. perhaps i was biased cause I had already seen the original, Little Deter needs to fly, (which btw is fuckin brilliant) and did not want to see bale acting out the scenes of death and drag that deter himself had described with such intensity and honesty. It was hopeless

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:43 AM, vasio said:

I liked "The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (1994), just saw the rating on imdb lol.

wasn't matthew mchonogghgpyy in it? whatever his name is, fuck

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:44 AM, Calx Sherbet said:

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:43 AM, vasio said:

I liked "The Return of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre" (1994), just saw the rating on imdb lol.

 

 

wasn't matthew mchonogghgpyy in it? whatever his name is, fuck

Yes, so was Renée Zellweger, she's hot in this one.

i'll admit that, yes

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:38 AM, Calx Sherbet said:

oh my lord, i can't believe how long this took me.....

 

The 3rd and 4th texas chainsaw massacre films. these almost need a thread of there own to serve as a monument of how horrible they are. i'd also say the 2nd one, but i bet some would say it's a cult classic (i hated it). but they totally blow. especially the 4th, that was such a lazily made movie. it was like watching a bag of rotting garbage spin in a washing machine.

lol

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:43 AM, dr lopez said:

but now that we're on herzog, rescue dawn was fucking pathetic. perhaps i was biased cause I had already seen the original, Little Deter needs to fly, (which btw is fuckin brilliant) and did not want to see bale acting out the scenes of death and drag that deter himself had described with such intensity and honesty. It was hopeless

agreed, Bale is a tosser.

there's only a handful of movies I walked out of and several DVDs I've turned off but I wont mention those

Napoleon Dynamite (I spent the whole movie wondering what was supposed to be funny)

The Thin Red Line (a boring mess)

Babel (another snooozefest)

Star Wars episode II (just lame)

and I fell asleep during Gladiator, the only time I've fallen asleep in a theater

  On 11/10/2009 at 4:43 AM, dr lopez said:

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:31 AM, dr lopez said:

  On 11/10/2009 at 3:08 AM, data said:

grizzly man is a fucking fantastic film. It made me laugh and cry at the same time and I left feeling like I had experienced both man and animal as well as nature at their most extremes. I'm am a dolt and Werner Herzog has more talent and creativity in his fingernail than I could ever dream of containing in my pathetic faculties.

but now that we're on herzog, rescue dawn was fucking pathetic. perhaps i was biased cause I had already seen the original, Little Deter needs to fly, (which btw is fuckin brilliant) and did not want to see bale acting out the scenes of death and drag that deter himself had described with such intensity and honesty. It was hopeless

i feel your pain. i was in a massive state of hysteria anticipating this film

and it just didn't quite do its justice. i was still entertained though. i would

not go as far as to say it was bad if put against truly bad films that i have seen,

but in herzog territory i give it low marks.

did you see 'Lessons of Darkness' Dr lopez? a very visually striking and

thought provoking film by herzog. subtle narration and beautiful

music's with fly-over documentation of the aftermath

of the iraq war. stunning.

i will now watch the original rescue dawn

i hope avatar doesn't cause a bump in this thread

  On 11/10/2009 at 5:31 AM, Fishtank said:

there's only a handful of movies I walked out of and several DVDs I've turned off but I wont mention those

 

Napoleon Dynamite (I spent the whole movie wondering what was supposed to be funny)

The Thin Red Line (a boring mess)

Babel (another snooozefest)

Star Wars episode II (just lame)

and I fell asleep during Gladiator, the only time I've fallen asleep in a theater

woe

the other's i enjoyed.

but i would agree on Star Wars episode II .

1 and 2 were just sucking snotty snivel drivel.

  On 11/10/2009 at 6:00 AM, troon said:

did you see 'Lessons of Darkness' Dr lopez? a very visually striking and

thought provoking film by herzog. subtle narration and beautiful

music's with fly-over documentation of the aftermath

of the iraq war. stunning.

 

i will now watch the original rescue dawn

WTF I agree with Troon? Somebody b7 me

  On 11/10/2009 at 5:31 AM, Fishtank said:

Napoleon Dynamite (I spent the whole movie wondering what was supposed to be funny)

i suppose that's somewhat the point.

The best explanation I can come up with is that Napoleon Dynamite hit the rural middle america nerve for me. Its portrayal of that suburban life was so perfect, (the couple who really want the yacht decor when they buy the tupperware, the presence of tetherball and lanyards, goodwill....) it all just added up to an immense pastoral portrait in a sad way. And thats the idea behind the movie: a case study in losers. complete losers. Every character in that movie is utterly pathetic, yet in their own unique way. For me the movie was too close to home (not my house but certainly my town and state) for it not to be funny, and when you add a large absurdist deadpan streak (the time machine subplot, the throwing of fruit, kip's girlfriend) to me it makes a absolutely hysterical movie.

I can see how people were put off by it. It made a huge merchandising splash, and suddenly it seemed cool to be hatin on Napoleon, as quotes and t shirts were commonplace in 04. My hope is that in a couple of years people realize what a truly excellent movie this is.