Relationship Advice...

Well, hopefully that's it, and she's not inquiring about whether I'm into women taller than 5'2.... because fuck those giantesses.

_{(I would)}

_{(just kidding 5'3 is insanely tall.  don't be ridiculous.)}

But " means inches? 160 inches is problematically tall imo.

  On 3/17/2021 at 8:42 PM, Zephyr_Nova said:

Was just sent the best tinder opening line:

"Hey, u into anything above 160?"

She's the one.

She's 4 metres tall. Please let us know how it goes.

  On 3/17/2021 at 8:49 PM, MIXL2 said:

160 bpm right? I got it? 

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The women was referring to centimetres but you intentionally misunderstood it as "beats per minute", which is funny because we are on a music forum, one that allows music above 160bpm at that. This was the joke.

160 lbs perhaps? Do you like big butts and cannot lie? 

send her this thread

Hey, you into anything below 15?

edit: I'm not referring to age, jfc

Anyway

  On 3/17/2021 at 9:29 PM, toaoaoad said:

160 lbs perhaps? Do you like big butts and cannot lie? 

  On 3/17/2021 at 9:18 PM, dingformung said:

The women was referring to centimetres but you intentionally misunderstood it as "beats per minute", which is funny because we are on a music forum, one that allows music above 160bpm at that. This was the joke.

  On 3/17/2021 at 9:09 PM, Enthusiast said:

But " means inches? 160 inches is problematically tall imo.

She's 4 metres tall. Please let us know how it goes.

  On 3/17/2021 at 8:49 PM, MIXL2 said:

160 bpm right? I got it? 

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She was referring to bpm.  Why else would I say "she's the one"?  Whole profile is like a shrine to aggro electronic music.  

I got the BPM joke but didn't realize it was actually what she really meant lol  

Yeah, when she popped up I was like "are you kidding me??  Cool."  I thought it unlikely that we'd match, since... I swear on average I prob swipe right on 100+ women before one will do the same on me.

I guess sending her the breakcore thread is more appropriate in this case 

It is likely I will refer to that at some point in our chats, if we have chats (those tend not to occur much on Tinder).

relationship = open shit lair

i hate love for how much it can fuck with you, jesus christ it can hurt

  On 3/18/2021 at 1:56 PM, thumbass said:

i hate love for how much it can fuck with you, jesus christ it can hurt

  On 3/18/2021 at 3:23 PM, cichlisuite said:

 

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This is actually a pretty nice way of looking at it, in just don't know if I'm going to be capable of thinking about heartbreak this way. Right now it just hurts lol. I cant see it as the good part right now, maybe later. Or maybe i need you force myself to change my mindset idk.

breakups are incredibly painful but can result in the most valuable friendships if you get your shit together and don't let yourself get carried away with toxicity, as it happened between my last ex and me. i can hardly express my appreciation of the fact i can turn to someone who really knows me, including the most intimate and ugly parts i wouldn't want to bother more casual aquaintances with.

very much worth it imo. i wish you the same.

Meh it's a fairy tale bro, one of you still has feelings

it's been pretty much exactly 4 years since we split up and i can guarantee you that is not the case. we're also both on swell terms with her now-married ex ex, who used to be my flatmate... dunno lol, guess we're just a bunch of hippies or something.

  On 3/18/2021 at 6:11 PM, jaderpansen said:

breakups are incredibly painful but can result in the most valuable friendships if you get your shit together and don't let yourself get carried away with toxicity, as it happened between my last ex and me. i can hardly express my appreciation of the fact i can turn to someone who really knows me, including the most intimate and ugly parts i wouldn't want to bother more casual aquaintances with.

very much worth it imo. i wish you the same.

                                                           yep, i agree:)

I've never remained friends with anyone I've dated.  The one I'd been with 10 years gave me an ultimatum like "if you break up with me now, you can never see or speak to me again."  So that's that.  And the most recent one decided out of the blue that distance would be best (this was 15 minutes before we were scheduled to meet up for the first time after breaking up).  So I view romantic relationships as eventual friendship enders.  But it's not the case for everyone, just has been in my experience.

  On 3/18/2021 at 6:11 PM, jaderpansen said:

breakups are incredibly painful but can result in the most valuable friendships if you get your shit together and don't let yourself get carried away with toxicity, as it happened between my last ex and me. i can hardly express my appreciation of the fact i can turn to someone who really knows me, including the most intimate and ugly parts i wouldn't want to bother more casual aquaintances with.

very much worth it imo. i wish you the same.

We are trying to stay friends but right now it just makes me think about what could have been. I'm trying not to get too toxic and move on. I think that when time passes I'll be happy i decided to remain friends 'cause we know each other well.

  On 3/18/2021 at 10:16 PM, thumbass said:

We are trying to stay friends but right now it just makes me think about what could have been. I'm trying not to get too toxic and move on. I think that when time passes I'll be happy i decided to remain friends 'cause we know each other well.

You're still very young iirc. I'd say time is the healer of all wounds, but it surely matters how you spend that time, too... Be around people you like being around, concentrate on the goals you pursue, if there aren't any in particular rn set some for yourself, take care of yourself. Believe me i know from experience it's far easier said than done.

The pain will stop eventually. All the best!

  On 3/18/2021 at 7:24 PM, jaderpansen said:

it's been pretty much exactly 4 years since we split up and i can guarantee you that is not the case. we're also both on swell terms with her now-married ex ex, who used to be my flatmate... dunno lol, guess we're just a bunch of hippies or something.

Or an incestuous family? Are you guys related?

  On 3/19/2021 at 12:25 AM, jaderpansen said:

You're still very young iirc. I'd say time is the healer of all wounds, but it surely matters how you spend that time, too... Be around people you like being around, concentrate on the goals you pursue, if there aren't any in particular rn set some for yourself, take care of yourself. Believe me i know from experience it's far easier said than done.

The pain will stop eventually. All the best!

Thanks, really appreciate the kind words. I know I'm going to get over it at some point, for now I'm gonna keep my head up and continue moving. The setting goals thing is a pretty good suggestion as I do not plan on sitting around wallowing in my emotions anymore.

  On 3/18/2021 at 6:11 PM, jaderpansen said:

breakups are incredibly painful but can result in the most valuable friendships if you get your shit together and don't let yourself get carried away with toxicity, as it happened between my last ex and me. i can hardly express my appreciation of the fact i can turn to someone who really knows me, including the most intimate and ugly parts i wouldn't want to bother more casual aquaintances with.

very much worth it imo. i wish you the same.

  On 3/18/2021 at 7:43 PM, Zephyr_Nova said:

I've never remained friends with anyone I've dated.  The one I'd been with 10 years gave me an ultimatum like "if you break up with me now, you can never see or speak to me again."  So that's that.  And the most recent one decided out of the blue that distance would be best (this was 15 minutes before we were scheduled to meet up for the first time after breaking up).  So I view romantic relationships as eventual friendship enders.  But it's not the case for everyone, just has been in my experience.

 I've never really been to do this after the end of a long term, intense relationship. I never saw the point. However, shorter term relationships totally, though if the other person was more emotionally invested, it still took time and investment to re-establish and form a new friendship.

Either way, it's a testament to the quality of a friendship if you can do this, but needs authenticity. 

  On 3/18/2021 at 10:16 PM, thumbass said:

We are trying to stay friends but right now it just makes me think about what could have been. I'm trying not to get too toxic and move on. I think that when time passes I'll be happy i decided to remain friends 'cause we know each other well.

All the best with this. It's good that you can recognise the potential for toxicity. Coming out of a relationship is akin to withdrawals from addiction, making sure you have a people to listen  and talk to, as well as giving you a kick up the arse if needed, is important (IMO).