discussion on having kids

so who has kids? is it great? everyone says is great. greatest thing they ever did. but no one ever says 'it was ok'. seems we're programmed to love our offspring (which is obviously a good thing) but I think there is also a part to it where parents cannot admit to themselves that infact waking up 3 times in the night isnt worth it for this little lifeform. lately i've been feeling very selfish and my brother had a baby and now thinks of nothing except the baby, totally overprotective.

is it just another (overwhelming) distraction from ourselves?

part of it too is that thats what you do next. graduate, job, married.... bored now....KIDS!!

think I might skip it. does anyone feel the same. and no 15 year olds agreeing with me please. when i was 15 i wanted to have kids. or at least thought i wanted some one day.

(that was very well thought out sorry but maybe you get the idea)

1 sprog. Love it. Hate myself.

it's the best thing in the world. it's that there aren't parts that suck. the first 6 weeks or so with a newborn can be a nightmare. and at each stage of life, there are things about your kid that frustrate the hell out of you. and it's easy to get too wrapped up in those things.

but despite all the frustrations, it's the best thing in the world. ever.

i think it would be a welcome distraction from myself. i'm up for it.

i can imagine it being intense, but i feel sorry for people who do it in their 20's. having kids looks like a 30's activity to me. i reckon you'd be in a more solid mental state to raise a decent human being at that age too.

my brother's first was born yesterday. i'm going to meet her this weekend. my wife and i talk about it some, but she thinks we're not organized enough to have one, which is her typical style of panic when she thinks about things that will be out of her control.

i personally think having kids is one of the main points of life.

i'm a dad... yes i love my son, but it really is hard work being a dad. it's probably the hardest thing for me, but i wouldn't trade it in for anything in the world. it's awesome watching him turn into a miniature version of myself (he says word a lot), but he's a handful to keep up with! and i have a second son on the way in a few weeks! 2 boys (3 because my wife includes me in the mix).

the infant stage was pretty easy! whenever i did wake up, i fed him, changed his diaper... probably only lasted about 15 minutes then back to bed!

yeah i'm not organised enough but i never will be so...

sorry for this, i don't have kids but it seemed somehow relevant.

i met a homeless girl addicted to pills, morphine, and crack once

and tried to help her life in significant ways just because.

i ended up losing lots of money and eventually getting

assaulted because i refused to drive her to the middle of

nowhere and drop her off.

she had two hippy daughters - daisy and ruby - and

in the short time i knew her those girls were one of

the best things i'd ever experienced in my life.

they were mean sometimes and had behavioral

issues but, in their cutest moments i could look

into their eyes and experience so much happiness.

i loved them, and then child protective services

whisked them into another state one day.

there's just something about little kids that is so affecting i think.

but then they turn into young adults and i'd imagine as a parent

it's hard to forget those moments, and they'll always be your little

cuties, no matter how rebellious and distant they grow.

  Benedict Cumberbatch said:

is it just another (overwhelming) distraction from ourselves?

god forbid you should be distracted from yourself. at the very least, having kids will help deflate your gigantic ego.

i believe that children are the future

  Fred McGriff said:

i personally think having kids is one of the main points of life.

well it pretty much is. humans are just a parasite and everythign about is programmed to reproduce.

- looking at opposite sex releases chemicals which make us feel good

- sex releases chemicals which make us feel good

- looking at babies releases chemicals which make us feel good

we're just programmed baby machines

  Z_B_Z said:

  Benedict Cumberbatch said:

is it just another (overwhelming) distraction from ourselves?

 

god forbid you should be distracted from yourself. at the very least, having kids will help deflate your gigantic ego.

erm my point was that people can't deal with themselves and use many distraction devices. nothing to do with my ego you tit

i dont know when i look at babies it's usually because they were screaming in the first place and that makes me want to punt it (lovingly mind you)

*lovingly punts a baby*

i dislike kids.

i don't want them.

if i become preggo i am getting an abortin.

i am 27.

  Z_B_Z said:

  Benedict Cumberbatch said:

is it just another (overwhelming) distraction from ourselves?

 

god forbid you should be distracted from yourself. at the very least, having kids will help deflate your gigantic ego.

who did the avatar your using?

also sounds like benedict cumberbatch might jealous of his new nephew/niece

  thanksomuch said:

i dislike kids.

i don't want them.

if i become preggo i am getting an abortin.

i am 27.

this is the only thing about you that bothers me... but you're still cool!

To pay the bills i do quite a lot of piano teaching. I do target rich parents with my prices so perhaps i'm not getting a full picture but pretty much every single kid i've taught in the last 3 or 4 years has been a total brat. It's really put me off.

  asymmetrical head said:

  thanksomuch said:

i dislike kids.

i don't want them.

if i become preggo i am getting an abortin.

i am 27.

 

this is the only thing about you that bothers me... but you're still cool!

i am sry i refuse my built in role as a baby machine.

I'm deeply involved with a woman who has a three year old... it's been handful and a joy to deal with this little girl /hell/ angel, makes me want to have my own soon.

I played bad cop the other night, and made her cry hysterically, it broke my heart, but she couldn't understand why I took away the small plastic piece she was chewing on, for fear she would choke.

ive come to realise that my parents seeming like a cunt when i was younger and making me seriously upset by inflicting actual discipline on me has made me a much more rounded and pleasant being than kids who could do what they wanted.

growing up was weird for me. my mom was the disciplinarian. my dad has down's syndrome so i remember playing trucks with him when i was 2 and he was way more into it than i was

  funkaholic said:

also sounds like benedict cumberbatch might jealous of his new nephew/niece

jealous of the attention hes getting from my brother?

or jealous of my brother for having a babby?

i am sad i'm not around to play with the babby. we're on different continents. if i dont have kids of my own i still like them and the babby is very adorable. no denying. i'm just questioning the whole process.

i like some kids but overall i don't want any, too much responsibility and too much can go wrong

+1 for kids but not for everyone (thankfully).

edit: I have one - a son. He's great.

My mom's enthusiasm for making babies is frightening, she says they're a joy but I definitely can tell that they're enormously taxing on her mental and physical health, you can't even have a conversation with her that lasts more than 30 seconds. It's unfair for the kids because she can only devote so much attention to each. Also, it seems like she treats them like an extension of her own ego, and it's very likely her desire to have more kids is selfishly driven. It seems like a lot of parents do the same thing, but I'd imagine it's not likely that they'd admit to it.