stupid first world problems you're dealing with

Nearly googled 'clown porn' at work...

ha, yeah google clown porn, 1st link.

*checks under bed*

I'm too afraid. I think clowns are an abomination as is, especially the Juggalo variety.

my dad got heavily into goa/psy trance, i tried getting him into intellectual types of electronic musics but he got into trance. though maybe it's still better better than having a dad listening to classical dadlike butt rock.

  On 5/3/2015 at 9:32 PM, eugene said:

my dad got heavily into goa/psy trance, i tried getting him into intellectual types of electronic musics but he got into trance. though maybe it's still better better than having a dad listening to classical dadlike butt rock.

Actually that's really nice. Getting into that type of electronic music normally evolves into liking things such as deh IDMz. Trust me.

I've been thinking about life again. I don't know. I think must of the type I'm a really sedentary person, just getting from work/school into my room and shitshat in the internet. I try to learn stuff actually, stuff that interests me like music, programming, writing, etc. though i feel something is missing.

If any of you have read some of my previous posts you already know that sometimes I feel like utter depressed shit. I've been working on that, slowly accepting the stuff that can't change and rejecting the stuff that I sometimes create as some "justification" about who I am.. normally bad prejudgments and shit.

Despite my improvement as a social being, I still think I'm doing something wrong. Like, I know I have much potential to do good stuff, to be productive or some shit, but there's like an invisible force that stops me from doing it. I don't think its laziness. Yeah, I have some free time, but that free time I spend it like "waiting" for the inspiration to arrive. I know it is normal, but I believe it is not normal to have that feel always.

So, what am I missing? A partner (girlfriend just to clarify lulz)? Money? Friends? What am I doing wrong? Is it my career? Is it my house?

Or is it just me?

The library has added way too many 3M Cloud Library books, which requires downloading a piece of shit app and no Kindle compatibility.

There are fucking NUTS in this cake!

  On 5/4/2015 at 5:53 AM, logakght said:

 

I've been thinking about life again. I don't know. I think must of the type I'm a really sedentary person, just getting from work/school into my room and shitshat in the internet. I try to learn stuff actually, stuff that interests me like music, programming, writing, etc. though i feel something is missing.

 

If any of you have read some of my previous posts you already know that sometimes I feel like utter depressed shit. I've been working on that, slowly accepting the stuff that can't change and rejecting the stuff that I sometimes create as some "justification" about who I am.. normally bad prejudgments and shit.

 

Despite my improvement as a social being, I still think I'm doing something wrong. Like, I know I have much potential to do good stuff, to be productive or some shit, but there's like an invisible force that stops me from doing it. I don't think its laziness. Yeah, I have some free time, but that free time I spend it like "waiting" for the inspiration to arrive. I know it is normal, but I believe it is not normal to have that feel always.

 

So, what am I missing? A partner (girlfriend just to clarify lulz)? Money? Friends? What am I doing wrong? Is it my career? Is it my house?

 

Or is it just me?

 

These are the eternal questions mein liebchen. Took me years to realise what I truly wanted to do was write novels, taking detours into being in a band, drawing comics, designing websites...all those years, wasted...

So no, not just you at all. We are all fucked together.

All I can say is try a little bit of everything until something feels totally right for you, be it a creative medium or a job (perhaps what you want is a career in something, that you can progress in?) or even just modifying your life to allow yourself to be lazy without guilt. Or make babies, which is the Meaning of Life, another thing a lot of people find to give true meaning to their lives. Find that 'invisible force' as it may be the very thing you want to do, spend your time on. And yes, this shit is hard!

As for 'waiting' for inspiration, sometimes you have to manufacture it: plenty of creative people start working at a specific time, even if they're not feeling it, and get something done, regardless. You could argue that not feeling inspired is a bad habit, and all bad habits can be retrained into good ones given enough work. Find a time in the day where you're usually free and force yourself to get something done, even if not particularly good. In time, it'll turn from good to stuff you're really happy with.

I used to have to force myself away from computer games to do some writing...now I have to pull myself away from writing to play the computer games I bought. You can change, just takes time.

For something to read on the matter of workng and schedules, try reading this blog about the writing schedules of many famous novelists. Maybe there's a schedule in there for you?: http://dailyroutines.typepad.com/

those are some kind words of wisdom, Bechuga

in other news - car wreck flashbacks,,,, any place any time = hey presto, city centers are the worst with noise, mardy cunts & more noise ,,,,,,,,,,,,,, pass the vals pls Doc

and yeah British election 2015, can we get this bs done already? Its not like any of these wankers are actually listening and now Russell Brand is w/The Green Party we can all move on collectively as a nation in trusting our democratic processes

and its only a matter of time b4 some loon shoots Farage (not that thats inciting or condoning such an act)

  On 5/4/2015 at 1:22 PM, Bechuga said:

 

  On 5/4/2015 at 5:53 AM, logakght said:

 

I've been thinking about life again. I don't know. I think must of the type I'm a really sedentary person, just getting from work/school into my room and shitshat in the internet. I try to learn stuff actually, stuff that interests me like music, programming, writing, etc. though i feel something is missing.

 

If any of you have read some of my previous posts you already know that sometimes I feel like utter depressed shit. I've been working on that, slowly accepting the stuff that can't change and rejecting the stuff that I sometimes create as some "justification" about who I am.. normally bad prejudgments and shit.

 

Despite my improvement as a social being, I still think I'm doing something wrong. Like, I know I have much potential to do good stuff, to be productive or some shit, but there's like an invisible force that stops me from doing it. I don't think its laziness. Yeah, I have some free time, but that free time I spend it like "waiting" for the inspiration to arrive. I know it is normal, but I believe it is not normal to have that feel always.

 

So, what am I missing? A partner (girlfriend just to clarify lulz)? Money? Friends? What am I doing wrong? Is it my career? Is it my house?

 

Or is it just me?

 

 

These are the eternal questions mein liebchen. Took me years to realise what I truly wanted to do was write novels, taking detours into being in a band, drawing comics, designing websites...all those years, wasted...

 

So no, not just you at all. We are all fucked together.

 

All I can say is try a little bit of everything until something feels totally right for you, be it a creative medium or a job (perhaps what you want is a career in something, that you can progress in?) or even just modifying your life to allow yourself to be lazy without guilt. Or make babies, which is the Meaning of Life, another thing a lot of people find to give true meaning to their lives. Find that 'invisible force' as it may be the very thing you want to do, spend your time on. And yes, this shit is hard!

 

As for 'waiting' for inspiration, sometimes you have to manufacture it: plenty of creative people start working at a specific time, even if they're not feeling it, and get something done, regardless. You could argue that not feeling inspired is a bad habit, and all bad habits can be retrained into good ones given enough work. Find a time in the day where you're usually free and force yourself to get something done, even if not particularly good. In time, it'll turn from good to stuff you're really happy with.

 

I used to have to force myself away from computer games to do some writing...now I have to pull myself away from writing to play the computer games I bought. You can change, just takes time.

 

For something to read on the matter of workng and schedules, try reading this blog about the writing schedules of many famous novelists. Maybe there's a schedule in there for you?: http://dailyroutines.typepad.com/

 

thank you dude, exactly what I needed.

Yeah, I second that 'force yourself' method. It's worked for me many a time. All sorts of unexpected yet quite fruitful results abound.

My Scrabble opponents aren't taking their turns frequently enough.

  On 5/5/2015 at 6:08 AM, Zephyr_Nova said:

My Scrabble opponents aren't taking their turns frequently enough.

I used to play online Scrabble with someone, until I found out they merely placed tiles down randomly until the board accepted it, often placing words they did not know at all. Throwing shit at the wall to see what sticks.

I was livid.

  On 5/5/2015 at 5:12 AM, Zephyr_Nova said:

Yeah, I second that 'force yourself' method. It's worked for me many a time. All sorts of unexpected yet quite fruitful results abound.

Definitely. Devoting time to it is a no brainer cuz you aren't going to get anything done, or get inspired if you're not putting in the work. I feel inspiration comes from messing around and not expecting any masterful results.

Also, sometimes you can just get some musical busy work out of the way. For instance, I make all my synths in Ableton's simpler but this requires me to tune each one and often times i put this off so it's impossible to get my chords to sound right when the synth is out of tune. Getting your chords down and your midi files how you want them really speeds things along as well

  On 5/5/2015 at 10:47 PM, Bechuga said:

 

  On 5/5/2015 at 6:08 AM, Zephyr_Nova said:

My Scrabble opponents aren't taking their turns frequently enough.

 

I used to play online Scrabble with someone, until I found out they merely placed tiles down randomly until the board accepted it, often placing words they did not know at all. Throwing shit at the wall to see what sticks.

 

I was livid.

 

I once jokingly told a friend to put away his anagrammer (he was brand new to the game and doing way better than I would reasonably expect). A few days later his girlfriend fessed up that him and her were both using online anagrammers against me for several games including that one! I was slightly annoyed but also pretty amused that they would actually do that.

FWP: I've felt a lingering sense of mild dread the past couple days, but it's not consciously linked to anything specific. It's just there.

A time limit on turns solves that problem

my writing difficulty has become a problem big enough to jeopardise my chances of career advancement.

I hate writing (reports, applications, whatever). I just can't bring myself to do it most of the time. don't know where to start, don't know how to spool out the mass of ideas/information in my head in an organised way, never happy with how it comes out i.e. whether it's good enough or not. the whole process is utterly torturous to me, like shitting boulders, and has become more so over time. this week - or rather, what remains of this week - I have to write an application for a promotion, plus a couple of industry reports, which is more than I can bear. I've been living in a fog of dread & apprehension this past week about when/how it's going to get done.

furthermore, my inability to write up shit in a timely way has been noticed over time by management and it's going to fuck with my chances of promotion, in that my bosses are going to note this in my referee reports in a way that suggests I can be generally unreliable, and the panel's impressions of me are going to be negatively skewed because of this one weakness. that's what I fear anyway.

I'm probably one of the last people to take career advice from, but I remember in my college/uni days we did a 10-minute "free write" exercise at the beginning of each class session for a writing course I was required to take.

I guess what I'm trying to say is practice just writing random shit - the first thoughts that come to mind, and regardless how much sense the content makes or how coherent it is is irrelevant. Maybe play some of your favourite choons and consume caffeine to help loosen up without losing motivation at the same time. But again, this is just practice.

It's natural to feel anxious, but what you think people's impressions of you aren't always what they actually are. Benefit of the doubt maybe. But there might still be a chance to convince your bosses that you're worthy of promotion.

  On 5/6/2015 at 5:51 AM, usagi said:

my writing difficulty has become a problem big enough to jeopardise my chances of career advancement.

 

I hate writing (reports, applications, whatever). I just can't bring myself to do it most of the time. don't know where to start, don't know how to spool out the mass of ideas/information in my head in an organised way, never happy with how it comes out i.e. whether it's good enough or not. the whole process is utterly torturous to me, like shitting boulders, and has become more so over time. this week - or rather, what remains of this week - I have to write an application for a promotion, plus a couple of industry reports, which is more than I can bear. I've been living in a fog of dread & apprehension this past week about when/how it's going to get done.

 

furthermore, my inability to write up shit in a timely way has been noticed over time by management and it's going to fuck with my chances of promotion, in that my bosses are going to note this in my referee reports in a way that suggests I can be generally unreliable, and the panel's impressions of me are going to be negatively skewed because of this one weakness. that's what I fear anyway.

I've been suffering from writer's block for a little over a year now - two reports due to finish my master's...blech.

If the panel is an interview type setting, just address the weakness head on - say something along the lines of you recognize that your writing is not your strongest aspect of your job performance, but you are working on it blah blah.

Anyways - soldier on - industry reports suck balls.

  On 5/6/2015 at 6:18 AM, ambermonk said:

I'm probably one of the last people to take career advice from, but I remember in my college/uni days we did a 10-minute "free write" exercise at the beginning of each class session for a writing course I was required to take.

 

I guess what I'm trying to say is practice just writing random shit - the first thoughts that come to mind, and regardless how much sense the content makes or how coherent it is is irrelevant. Maybe play some of your favourite choons and consume caffeine to help loosen up without losing motivation at the same time. But again, this is just practice.

 

It's natural to feel anxious, but what you think people's impressions of you aren't always what they actually are. Benefit of the doubt maybe. But there might still be a chance to convince your bosses that you're worthy of promotion.

practicing writing would probably help, actually. I almost never do that, which probably makes it harder when you have to.

  On 5/6/2015 at 7:51 AM, chenGOD said:

I've been suffering from writer's block for a little over a year now - two reports due to finish my master's...blech.

 

If the panel is an interview type setting, just address the weakness head on - say something along the lines of you recognize that your writing is not your strongest aspect of your job performance, but you are working on it blah blah.

Anyways - soldier on - industry reports suck balls.

my industry reports are actually quality, according to my bosses. I just have a hard time pooping them out. I usually end up pulling all-nighters at my desk.

booo to all nighters lol

  On 5/6/2015 at 5:51 AM, usagi said:

my writing difficulty has become a problem big enough to jeopardise my chances of career advancement.

 

I hate writing (reports, applications, whatever). I just can't bring myself to do it most of the time. don't know where to start, don't know how to spool out the mass of ideas/information in my head in an organised way, never happy with how it comes out i.e. whether it's good enough or not. the whole process is utterly torturous to me, like shitting boulders, and has become more so over time. this week - or rather, what remains of this week - I have to write an application for a promotion, plus a couple of industry reports, which is more than I can bear. I've been living in a fog of dread & apprehension this past week about when/how it's going to get done.

 

furthermore, my inability to write up shit in a timely way has been noticed over time by management and it's going to fuck with my chances of promotion, in that my bosses are going to note this in my referee reports in a way that suggests I can be generally unreliable, and the panel's impressions of me are going to be negatively skewed because of this one weakness. that's what I fear anyway.

Everyone has a different starting point. Do you start at the beginning? Perhaps write up your conclusions first and then work your way back, explaining why your conclusion is so in reverse. Or merely write short sections of your report, and then collate all those sections into one whole, tied off neatly with an intro and conclusion. Often finding a different way through the maze lifts the stress so much like you wouldn't believe.

Or perhaps you could install a speech-to-text program, rattle out your thoughts for a while into the program and then edit down your monologue into something becoming of a report. Are you better at talking about your data/info than writing it? That could be a way through, which would also negate the writing aspect (up to a point). Or hire a secretary...

Been feeling a bit down since the start of the week and I should be doing a report for a course I'm on but I just really don't fancy doing it at the moment. More sitting here and feeling sorry for myself I guess.

I want to start working out again but the cycle of life is making this difficult. I looked damn good like 18 months ago and now I just look skinny with some secret flab. Shits wack

Apparently there's like a switch that flips on at a point in your mid-thirties, and from then on much of your life will be devoted to developing an effective nosehair management protocol.