Things people write on Facebook

  On 1/23/2013 at 9:28 PM, Gocab said:

She must have be a great philosopher.

"The only limit is the one you set yourself"

"Leaving for work at 5:40am.... Ummm can one say early. (:

Comments:

Early lol

Early!!!"

"I realized in only myself when I'm drunk....or is that so??? :-)"

someone posted on a picture of someone's cat "aww cute" and the person replied "thank you" ?

As a fan of DG for almost a decade, people like her are why Facebook is so boring nowadays

The ever-changing privacy features and "timeline" management options is frustrating. I randomly commented on a buzzfeed article and somehow it was published on my wall, so my replied to it

:/

...then her reply got 4 likes and mine received none.

.________.

On the flipside my grandfather, who is in his 70s, joined facebook a month or so ago and it's one of the few reasons I stay on. He's been posting random and oft entertaining anecdotes as status updates.

For example, from his days of managing restaurants:

  Quote

 

In the early 70's a Church's Chicken in a rough part of San Antonio hired a Vietnamese refugee who spoke little English. Late one night a well known thug came to the sales window. Nobody wanted to wait on him because he abused everyone. They gestured to Trung, who said help you please. He was good at math and knew the numbered menu well.

 

The thug let out "chinky mf---" and a string of obscenities directed at Trung, his mother, and the Vietnamese in general. Trung gave him a big broad smile and replied, "Must order by number only please."

  On 1/28/2013 at 2:06 AM, Tauhid said:

"The only limit is the one you set yourself"

I get so many of these motivational quotes in my status feed, and they're always accompanied by 10+ likes. But I bet if there were a dislike button it would cancel those likes right out and then some.

I tried to find an example of this, and by some stroke of fortune one of the worst offenders had merely posted pictures of his new heart shaped lighter that looks like a dildo. I really want to comment that it looks like a dildo, but then I would be the asshole.

FWP: I wanted to contribute something to this thread but none of the status updates in my recent feed were embarrassing, and now I'm using this thread and the FWP thread interchangeably.

lel

Troll Mom strikes again

"Babies are people too. Give babies a chance. End the holocaust."

I think this may be the last straw. My patience was wearing thin after the "guvment's tryin' to take our guns" ranting, but that combined with the "abortion should not even be a debate; it's genocide" rhetoric is too much for me to accept on my news feed.

  On 1/31/2013 at 2:16 AM, Zephyr_Nova said:

 

  On 1/28/2013 at 2:06 AM, Tauhid said:

"The only limit is the one you set yourself"

 

I get so many of these motivational quotes in my status feed, and they're always accompanied by 10+ likes. But I bet if there were a dislike button it would cancel those likes right out and then some.

 

I tried to find an example of this, and by some stroke of fortune one of the worst offenders had merely posted pictures of his new heart shaped lighter that looks like a dildo. I really want to comment that it looks like a dildo, but then I would be the asshole.

 

FWP: I wanted to contribute something to this thread but none of the status updates in my recent feed were embarrassing, and now I'm using this thread and the FWP thread interchangeably.

I think it's strange that people post those things. If there was no such thing as social media, I don't think people wouldn't be emailing that shit to each other. It's pretty cheap.

"My phone just grew sentience and is announcing the title of every damn work email and meeting request I receive VERY LOUDLY."

  On 1/31/2013 at 2:16 AM, Zephyr_Nova said:

 

  On 1/28/2013 at 2:06 AM, Tauhid said:

"The only limit is the one you set yourself"

 

I get so many of these motivational quotes in my status feed, and they're always accompanied by 10+ likes. But I bet if there were a dislike button it would cancel those likes right out and then some.

 

I tried to find an example of this, and by some stroke of fortune one of the worst offenders had merely posted pictures of his new heart shaped lighter that looks like a dildo. I really want to comment that it looks like a dildo, but then I would be the asshole.

Be the asshole. Cause remember, the only limit is the one you set yourself.

  On 2/6/2013 at 10:08 PM, Ceerial said:

what the fuck is this i don't even.

I think it's called "a bunch of Cunts". That includes the picture and the poster.

  On 1/31/2013 at 4:24 PM, Zephyr_Nova said:

"Babies are people too. Give babies a chance. End the holocaust."

 

I think this may be the last straw. My patience was wearing thin after the "guvment's tryin' to take our guns" ranting, but that combined with the "abortion should not even be a debate; it's genocide" rhetoric is too much for me to accept on my news feed.

oh what fun!

also

Whoa, it's Essines! Weird, I was wondering what happened to you earlier today... Now I know for sure you're still alive. Nice!

Are you back in Vic?

gold:

http://www.facebook.com/teensonlyoffiicial

I woke up this morning to find everyone spamming this story on my newsfeed, shitting themselves because THEY HURT HER:

  Quote

 

R.I.P.- They hurt her.

After lunch, her teacher announced that the school was holding a fire drill. When the alarm sounded, Carmen and the other students filed out of the classroom and assembled in the yard outside. As the teachers read out the roll call, the gang of five girls decided that this was a great opportunity to embarrass Carmen in front of the whole school during the fire drill. They .
..moved over to where Carmen was standing, near a sewer drain, and began crowding the poor girl, getting in her face and nudging her towards the open manhole.

They pushed her and she tripped over and fell head-first down the manhole. When they saw her falling, the girls started giggling and when Carmen’s name was called out, they shouted "She’s down in the sewer!"

All of the other students began laughing. But when the teachers looked down the manhole and saw Carmen’s body lying at the bottom in the muck and the poop, the laughter abruptly stopped. Her head was twisted around at an odd angle and her face was covered in blood. Worse still, she wasn’t moving. There was nothing any of the teachers could do for her. Carmen was dead. When the police arrived and went down into the sewer, they determined that she had broken her neck. Her face had been torn off when she hit the ladder on the way down and her neck snapped when she landed on her head on the concrete at the bottom.

The police hauled Carmen’s body out of the sewer and sent her to the mortuary. Everyone had to stay behind after school while the police questioned all of Carmen’s classmates. The five girls lied to the police, saying they had witnessed Carmen falling down the sewer. The police believed the girls and Carmen Winstead’s death was ruled an accident and the case was closed. Everyone thought that was the last they would hear of Carmen Winstead, but they were wrong.

Months later,Carmen’s classmates began receiving strange e-mails on their MySpaces. The e-mails were titled "They Pushed Her" and claimed that Carmen hadn’t really fallen down the sewer, she had been pushed. The e-mails also warned that the guilty people should own up and take responsibility for their crime. If they didn’t there would be horrible consequences. Most people dismissed the e-mails as a hoax, but others were not so sure.

A few days later,one of the girls who pushed Carmen down the sewer was at home taking a shower, when she heard a strange cackling laugh. It seemed to be coming from the drain. The girl started to freak out and ran out of the bathroom. That night, the girl said goodnight to her mom and went to sleep. Five hours later, her mom was awoken in the middle of the night, by a loud noise that resounded throughout the house. She ran into her daughter’s room, only to find it empty. There was no trace of the girl. The worried mother called the police and when they arrived,they conducted a search of the area. Eventually, they discovered the girl’s grisly remains. Her corpse was lying in the sewer, covered in muck and poop. Her neck was broken and her face missing. It had been completely torn off. One by one, all of the girls who pushed Carmen that day were found dead. They had all been killed in exactly the same way and were all found at exactly the same spot. In the sewer at the bottom of the same uncovered manhole where Carmen had met her doom. But the killing didn’t stop there. More and more of Carmen’s former classmates were found dead. It seemed that anyone who didn’t believe that Carmen had been pushed, was eventually found down in the sewer with their necks broken and their faces torn off.They say that Carmen’s ghost is still on the rampage, hunting down anyone who doesn’t believe her story. According to the legend, Carmen will get you, whetherit’s from a toilet, a shower, a sink or a drain. When you go to sleep, you’ll wake up in the sewer, in complete darkness, paralyzed, unable to move, hearing cackling laughter all around you. Then, as you scream in horror, Carmen will come and tear your face off.

So be careful who you bully, because you just might find yourself on the receiving end of the curse of Carmen Winstead.

FACT: About two months later,16-year-old David Gregory read this post and didn't repost it. When he went to take a shower, he heard laughter, started freaking out, and ran to his computer to repost it. He said goodnight to his mom and went to sleep, but five hours later,his mom woke up in the middle of the night from a loud noise and David was gone. A few hours later,the police found him in the sewer, with a broken neck and the skin on his face peeled off.

Even Google her name - you'll find this to be true.

If you don't repost this saying "They hurt her," then Carmen will get you, either from a Carmen Winstead it's actually true

Shit Scared . Dont ignore :O

 

That is the shittiest creepypasta I've read. Are all your friends age 10-15?

lol, I don't have hardly any IRL friends to add on Facebook so no. This sadly came from family members, who worryingly have children

"Trees don't grow even, they don't grow straight.. Just however it makes them happy."

w0t

trees grow so i can wipe my asshole with them

Call me old fashion and weird but I believe in relationships. I'm the nice guy that's y...

  On 2/12/2013 at 11:14 AM, Ceerial said:

gold:

 

http://www.facebook.com/teensonlyoffiicial

I was about to punch my eyes out then i realized these are fucking 12 year old kids, most 12 year old kids are fucking idiots, if our generation had facebook back when we were teens it would be as annoying as this one. (dont get me wrong its fucking hilarious to read these but i would say give them a break, dont get angry at them lol)

(and if a grown person is caught acting like this on facebook please adult bully the shit out of them)

this one made lol (100,000 likes lol)

I always hide shitty Friend posts. As a result the majority of my posts are spam from sites i've liked.