stupid first world achievements and successes

Halloween night at the club, got the prostitutes to buy me drinks. (No homo)

Bought a record through Discogs from a shop in Spain a few days ago. Just checked and found basically the best email I have ever received in my life. Animated gif header with flashing pink neon sign lettering, picture of a record deck with a serious vapourwave vibe blue to black gradient behind it. Massive list of text all center aligned with double spaces between the lines, a selection of the worst fonts available to man all decked out in black, blue, red and bright pink colours with gratuitous use of bold, underline and italic in various combinations. In the middle of it all is a picture of a dude (who I presume is the owner) with a handlebar moustache and his hands on his hips standing in the shop wearing what looks like a red jumpsuit. It is a thing of beauty.

yet you post a text description of said email instead of a screenshot. forsooth!

A coworker gave me a 2kg tub of Haribo because he felt guilty about the work he gives me to do, even though it's part of my job description to do the work he puts through into the warehouse (he works in the office).

I don't really get it, but...free Haribo!

If you knew the freebies that people get in the office, you would perhaps feel a little misled, "what, only 2 kilos, i cut you man".

i have found the meaning of my life

I've actually got a first world success to report. The special fancy arsed chocolate milk I was going to buy was on special at 40% it's normal retal price. I bought two and still saved a dollar.

Yuss.

The £3.99 bottle of red I bought at the Co-op was a bit meh, but I made it into a nice tinto with some lemon and lime fizzy water. Get in!

/gets pissed with MC on rocket fuel

Isn't it 11am or something there? Hardcore. Plus rocket fuel isn't even a drink. *fistbump*

I work nights and it's my Friday night and I posted that at 07:47 am. Currently I'm at a café with my brother awaiting my decaf cappuccino. It's westerly winds and 40 degrees outside, so we're hiding from the heat.

Don't do fistbumps or high fives, sorry.

I just fucked to Scion Arrange+Process Basic Channel. it was mad. thank you.

listening to star wars episode 4 ost

the clutch cable on my bike snapped the other day while I was riding. I was just now trying to get some info on the net on how to fix the problem, attempted to google "repairing snapped clutch cable" but spastically typo'd "repairing snapped clit" + Enter, and lol'd for about 5 mins. I feel good now. that's my fwa.

I'm on vacation right now and the other night I started going to the gym again, became acquainted with a new lady friend, met a great new dealer who will deliver to my apartment and bought some hash and buds all within the span of about 3 hours.

I have a mix of an acute bacterial infection and polyp in my sinus, I am waiting back on cultures for a suspected fungal infection mixed in there too... I'm on antibiotics, and steroids for it so it should go away in the week coming, but before that it was being on and off sick with no fever or symptoms other than sinus pressure, respiratory drainage and tons of productive coughing. Fucking miserable! It's like having all the energy zapped out of you all the while there's a golfball stuck under your face constantly throbbing and you can't even enjoy weed or exercise... I've had zero energy for the last month or so and I finally broke down and had to head to the doctor this last week

Fucking sinuses. Can we outgrow them like adenoids or appendixes?

I've become an ethereal entity at last.

god dammit, I always post 1st world problems in the 1st world achievements thread... thus creating a paradox of 1st world strife.

  On 11/30/2014 at 12:20 AM, Audioblysk said:

god dammit, I always post 1st world problems in the 1st world achievements thread... thus creating a paradox of 1st world strife.

but... thats a first world pro........

wait I see what you did there

Managed to find a limited edition hat + buy it for way under the general rip-off prices on eBay. Xmas is saved (for my little brother anyway)! At least, as long as it's the right one when it gets here...

1. Oversteps is still good.

2. I might actually get some sleep tonight.

Finally overcome a 9 month (!) writers block + am underway writing another book, which is so far going well without (much) self doubts. So far so good...

And if I'm being honest, 9 months isn't that long to be stuck really: my first writers block lasted 11 years.

Sitting in a shopping centre eating caramel cheesecake with a decaf cappuccino whilst an huge front of thunderstorm passes overhead. I should be heading to bed about now but we only have a single car garage and the space is already occupied, so in order to avoid the potential hail damage i'm passing my time here.

There is a child doing laps of the area beyond our chairs and tables screaming as he goes past, for the deranged pleasure of it i suppose. The mini mullet, tank top and stick on tattoo on his right arm don't bode well for the little oiks future. Oh look he's found grandmamma, a bloated sea cow perched astride, or was that winched onto in an heap one of those fatty mobiles that shopping centres provide for the invalid or ill advised of prior life choices. Oh look the mum has come into the picture, she's still ambulatory, just, pushing a trolley full of trans fats and sucrose. Take him away ladies, good work.

/Checks weather radar

I'm trying to surreptitiously check out and perhaps meet the eyes of this delightful young maiden, whom my peripheral vision is telling me keeps craning her neck around to take a peak at me. But every time I look up from my phone and in her direction this upset with existence slag sitting on the table in front, positioned facing me, stares deep cowling diamond tipped daggers straight at me. This woman contains neither shame nor remorse, she won't even acknowledge the warmth of my smile, cronish trollfiend.

Oh good, my coffee done, might get a beer.

See there's positivity and light in my posts if you can find them. They can up the page count of the life successes thread.

does being a complete twat feel good? is that the achievement here?