Post terrible idea for films

A biopic of Rob Ford starring a hologram of John Candy in the titular role. Directed by Brett Ratner.

Maize In The Pooz

Most every frame in this film is looking up from the toilet bowl at a man's shitting asshole (but the toilet rim is also in the shot for composition-sake). He always shits pooz with maize. We follow this man's phone conversations on the toilet (and conversations immediately before/after sitting/shitting; camera stays in toilet), throughout the course of a single day, and what starts post-breakfast as a casual argument with his girlfriend about not wanting to attend brunch the following day, slowly unfolds by evening into a who-done-it mystery about a corpse that appears in the neighboring stall. The girlfriend seems to know the dead man... How did they know each other? What is made very apparent is that no matter how much drama is going on in life, we all gotta take a shit when we gotta take a shit. ...How can everyone at this man's workplace who uses the stall with the corpse, react so nonchalantly about it? What is the secret of the man with the maize in the pooz, and the corpse, and the girlfriend, and the brunch, and the stall, and the workplace, and the toilet?!?!?!

Twist ending:

Fruits of My Labor

Channing Tatum is a simple guy living an isolated existence in a cabin in the woods, trying out the survivalist lifestyle. Having run out of his usual food staples, he goes out foraging and picks many varieties of plants and fruit that he finds to eat. He makes a nice salad out of them and enjoys eating it. Hours later he begins to feel sick. Having no means to contact the outside world, he tries to remember what he picked and attempts to look up each plant in his encyclopedia to see if it's harmful to eat. He doesn't turn up anything harmful in his search but that's when the uncontrollable diarrhea begins. Having no proper sanitation facilities, he's forced to do his business out in the surrounding woods. The foul stench of his excrement attracts all manner of animals from the area and he soon finds himself fending off wolves and bears while sifting through his shits to see if he can find any clue to what is ailing him. Will he die? Will he be eaten? Only time will tell.

filming a turned off freezer section in a supermarket for a year. the film is a year long

A biographical film about NWA and their breakup, but not entirely factual and it makes Dr. Dre look like a much better person than he really is.

  On 9/30/2015 at 3:50 PM, peace 7 said:

Maize In The Pooz

 

Most every frame in this film is looking up from the toilet bowl at a man's shitting asshole (but the toilet rim is also in the shot for composition-sake). He always shits pooz with maize. We follow this man's phone conversations on the toilet (and conversations immediately before/after sitting/shitting; camera stays in toilet), throughout the course of a single day, and what starts post-breakfast as a casual argument with his girlfriend about not wanting to attend brunch the following day, slowly unfolds by evening into a who-done-it mystery about a corpse that appears in the neighboring stall. The girlfriend seems to know the dead man... How did they know each other? What is made very apparent is that no matter how much drama is going on in life, we all gotta take a shit when we gotta take a shit. ...How can everyone at this man's workplace who uses the stall with the corpse, react so nonchalantly about it? What is the secret of the man with the maize in the pooz, and the corpse, and the girlfriend, and the brunch, and the stall, and the workplace, and the toilet?!?!?!

 

Twist ending:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

The man on the toilet is M. Night Shyamalan.

 

I'd go see that one

  On 9/30/2015 at 5:23 PM, ambermonk said:

 

  On 9/30/2015 at 3:50 PM, peace 7 said:

Maize In The Pooz

 

Most every frame in this film is looking up from the toilet bowl at a man's shitting asshole (but the toilet rim is also in the shot for composition-sake). He always shits pooz with maize. We follow this man's phone conversations on the toilet (and conversations immediately before/after sitting/shitting; camera stays in toilet), throughout the course of a single day, and what starts post-breakfast as a casual argument with his girlfriend about not wanting to attend brunch the following day, slowly unfolds by evening into a who-done-it mystery about a corpse that appears in the neighboring stall. The girlfriend seems to know the dead man... How did they know each other? What is made very apparent is that no matter how much drama is going on in life, we all gotta take a shit when we gotta take a shit. ...How can everyone at this man's workplace who uses the stall with the corpse, react so nonchalantly about it? What is the secret of the man with the maize in the pooz, and the corpse, and the girlfriend, and the brunch, and the stall, and the workplace, and the toilet?!?!?!

 

Twist ending:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

The man on the toilet is M. Night Shyamalan.

 

I'd go see that one

 

Definitely YES.

Kickstarter, plis.

Shitstarter

  On 9/30/2015 at 10:53 AM, Haste said:

 

  On 9/30/2015 at 8:48 AM, ambermonk said:

Red Shirt: The Concert Show Menace (Sci-Fi/Horror)

 

A dubstep concert ensues. A tall, strange man wearing a red shirt is drifting randomly around the center of the crowd, facing to the right, as everyone else faces forward. One irritated fan decided he had enough of the red-shirted drifter and started shoving him. All the sudden, all hell broke loose, as the drifting man went berserk and started shooting lasers out of his eyeballs, vaporizing fans left and right. Only a certain cybergoth couple manages to escape the venue alive, and must find a way to stop the laser-eyed drifter from wreaking havoc on the rest of the city, who is facing one direction the entire time.

 

OK, I'm setting up a kickstarter for this one right now.

 

Wait a second- isn't this a film already? Except the film I'm looOOooOOoosely remembering had an 80's hair metal dude. The one-direction concept is pretty next-level shit, though.

^ Based on a true story BTW

*Everybody Loves Raymond and Confused*

Ray Romano smokes weed and then talks in his dumb voice for two hours about his humorous domestic observations

Movie based on political discussions on WATMM.

Will feature lots of political buzzwords.

Everybody Loves Rain Man

A film of the popular TV series Everybody Loves Raymond with Raymond Babbitt filling the role of Raymond Romano.

*Everybody Loves Reagan and Confused*

A stoner flick about trickle-down-economics

*Phased and Confused*

Just the movie Dazed and Confused

But with the audio run though an EHX Small Stone phaser

Aphex and Confexed

Unrelated to the megastar EDM DJ, this flim charts the progress of an Aural Exciter plug-in as it is installed on numerous Dell laptops by a man wearing a sex face.

*Being LimpyLoo*

A mentally ill drug addict stares at an iPad

trying to think of a terrible idea for a film

And decides on a film where

A mentally ill drug addict stares at an iPad

Trying to think of a terrible idea for a film

And decides on a film where

A mentally ill drug addict stares at an iPad

Thing to think of a terrible idea for a film

And decides on a film where

A mentally ill drug addict stares at an iPad...

(starring Brad Pitt as LimpyLoo)

*Peeing LimpyLoo*

A man walks up to a urinal

Pulls out his penis

And then for the next two hours

Proceeds to push me out of his urethra

Like

A film about a regular guy quitting Facebook. It's really deep and shit. Something something remember real life. Love, hiking, nature, talking, uplifting music. Starring Ryan Gosling and Mila Kunis

  On 10/1/2015 at 9:04 PM, Gocab said:

Like

 

A film about a regular guy quitting Facebook. It's really deep and shit. Something something remember real life. Love, hiking, nature, talking, uplifting music. Starring Ryan Gosling and Mila Kunis

HAHAHA

A dominatrix film starring Tilda Swinton. She wears a gas mask for the first 90 minutes of the film and makes old dudes poop in adult diapers because that's their fetish. After that 90 minute one take scene, she goes to her other job at Starbucks and realizes she forgot to take her spikey nipple pasties off. Scarlett Johannses walks in dressed as a nun with a beer helmet on and asks for a pumpkin spice latte. The screen goes black before she gets the latte and the credits roll...

Wait no thats already done

  On 10/1/2015 at 6:32 PM, fenton said:

Aphex and Confexed

 

Unrelated to the megastar EDM DJ, this flim charts the progress of an Aural Exciter plug-in as it is installed on numerous Dell laptops by a man wearing a sex face.

Director's Cut to feature the actual piece of gear being fondled by man in sex face.

  On 10/1/2015 at 9:13 PM, coax said:

 

  On 10/1/2015 at 9:04 PM, Gocab said:

Like

 

A film about a regular guy quitting Facebook. It's really deep and shit. Something something remember real life. Love, hiking, nature, talking, uplifting music. Starring Ryan Gosling and Mila Kunis

HAHAHA

 

This is pretty good. It'd probably work and inspire people to quit facebook, starting a trend in quitting facebook.