stupid first world problems you're dealing with

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

For fuck's sake.

Also tomorrow is most likely gonna be reeeeeeally awkward as we've filled out a employee satisfaction survey and from what I know a couple of people including me have complained about my boss. I especially told him exactly how I feel about certain things. Luckily, the survey was anonymous but if he just stops and thinks for a second he'll know which one is mine.

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

...

Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

every day.

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

 

For fuck's sake.

 

Also tomorrow is most likely gonna be reeeeeeally awkward as we've filled out a employee satisfaction survey and from what I know a couple of people including me have complained about my boss. I especially told him exactly how I feel about certain things. Luckily, the survey was anonymous but if he just stops and thinks for a second he'll know which one is mine.

aged 25 i did this all the fucking time, but now im just content and happy with what ive got. which is pretty much bugger all, im a kitchen porter. im currently working on a large enough repetoire to play smooth cocktail jazz piano in hotel lobbys, then im gonna buy a suit and go round every swanky hotel in glasgow that doesnt have a cocktail jazz pianist and see if they want one. other than that for a plan, my career trajectory is absolutely miserable. still happy though. got a nice chunk of studio gear however.

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

 

For fuck's sake.

 

Also tomorrow is most likely gonna be reeeeeeally awkward as we've filled out a employee satisfaction survey and from what I know a couple of people including me have complained about my boss. I especially told him exactly how I feel about certain things. Luckily, the survey was anonymous but if he just stops and thinks for a second he'll know which one is mine.

I find comparing yourself to other people is never healthy. What projects would you want to start that would make you satisfied?

I used to feel that way fairly often. I guess my (humble) personal projects have distracted me enough into a state of content with my unremarkable life.

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

big time.

Pre-recorded video job interviews are an abomination.

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

 

For fuck's sake.

 

Also tomorrow is most likely gonna be reeeeeeally awkward as we've filled out a employee satisfaction survey and from what I know a couple of people including me have complained about my boss. I especially told him exactly how I feel about certain things. Luckily, the survey was anonymous but if he just stops and thinks for a second he'll know which one is mine.

less so now that i got rid of facebook

well, pretty sure my 5+ year live-in relationship is about to fall apart.

  On 2/1/2016 at 3:00 AM, luke viia said:

 

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

big time.

 

I do almost daily, as sad as that sounds.

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

 

 

Yeh man, a lot. I'm 30, broke and back at college. I am still financially dependent on my parents. I already finished a degree before this, but was unable to use it effectively. Meanwhile, my college buddies are on their ways to becoming doctors, have sweet girlfriends, go on holidays, to parties and generally just seem to be 'on their way'. I share my feelings of inadequacy with them, and they always support me saying "that you'r e on your way of doing something that you really like, and is worthwhile!" that is true, and i appreciate them saying that. Still, it sucks. I compare myself with them, and i feel like somewhere i've failed, but i know i shouldn't ..

I am experiencing dual feelings: one of being inadquate and the other is.. well.. that it's easy to compare yourself with others and hate yourself for not being them, but at the same the time realizing that you can never be them, and are always you, and should work from that. TIme is an illusion and dank memes 4 lyfe.

well said sir

  On 2/1/2016 at 7:09 AM, double uv said:

 

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

 

 

 

Yeh man, a lot. I'm 30, broke and back at college. I am still financially dependent on my parents. I already finished a degree before this, but was unable to use it effectively. Meanwhile, my college buddies are on their ways to becoming doctors, have sweet girlfriends, go on holidays, to parties and generally just seem to be 'on their way'. I share my feelings of inadequacy with them, and they always support me saying "that you'r e on your way of doing something that you really like, and is worthwhile!" that is true, and i appreciate them saying that. Still, it sucks. I compare myself with them, and i feel like somewhere i've failed, but i know i shouldn't ..

 

 

I am experiencing dual feelings: one of being inadquate and the other is.. well.. that it's easy to compare yourself with others and hate yourself for not being them, but at the same the time realizing that you can never be them, and are always you, and should work from that. TIme is an illusion and dank memes 4 lyfe.

 

I used to get in that habit of comparing myself to others in the same age group too. But as "well off" as your peers appear to be, you wonder if they are actually happy, too. Maybe their being, married, having kids, new cars, and a house are all a facade to make up for other insecurities. Could be short-term bliss, but they could also be in a mountain of debt for all we know. More and more, I think the "keeping up with the Joneses" mentality is like trying to pattern your life on a fairy tale. Life is never perfect, like a Disney movie. And at some point, an unexpected life-changing event can occur in a matter of seconds.

I dunno. It's easier to lament about what we don't have, than to be grateful for what we already do I think. But I'm just thinking out loud, whether or not any of this makes sense.

I've been doing more drugs than usual... Not like a reckless amount or anything dangerous, but this insatiable urge to stay fucking with some receptor set in my brain is getting a little old.

I think I'm bored with my work at the moment and nervous/anxious for things to come in terms of money and career stuff. Probably part of the reason for the above problem... I remember feeling like this as a teen and early 20's lad when I was bored and worried about things. Not very healthy...

  On 2/1/2016 at 5:58 AM, luke viia said:

well, pretty sure my 5+ year live-in relationship is about to fall apart.

Sorry to hear that... I hope things are at lease somewhat civil. I had a blow out a year or two back with a very long term live-in GF and it was pure hell for me, but that was due to some shady things on her part. Never easy, these things are...

at the risk of sounding like an edgelord: nobody really knows what they're doing or where the fuck they're going, and certainly not why. sure your career is great and your marriage is nice and your possessions are cool but so what? what's it all for? in the end you're just going to be dust in the ground like everyone else and that's that. if there is no final judgement and no promised afterlife and all meaning is manufactured/relative, then really, what separates you from the hobo sleeping on the corner who bombed out of life early and has 'achieved' nothing? nothing, that's what.

but being plagued by thoughts like these is probably worse than plain old feelings of inadequacy which everyone gets, so let's just carry on with this collective illusion while it's going and forget I said anything.

  On 2/1/2016 at 7:31 AM, usagi said:

at the risk of sounding like an edgelord: nobody really knows what they're doing or where the fuck they're going, and certainly not why. sure your career is great and your marriage is nice and your possessions are cool but so what? what's it all for? in the end you're just going to be dust in the ground like everyone else and that's that. if there is no final judgement and no promised afterlife and all meaning is manufactured/relative, then really, what separates you from the hobo sleeping on the corner who bombed out of life early and has 'achieved' nothing? nothing, that's what.

 

but being plagued by thoughts like these is probably worse than plain old feelings of inadequacy which everyone gets, so let's just carry on with this collective illusion while it's going and forget I said anything.

(does more drugs)

  On 2/1/2016 at 5:58 AM, luke viia said:

well, pretty sure my 5+ year live-in relationship is about to fall apart.

sympathies, mayne maybe you should, you know...

GET A BIKE

seriously, it does help with the pain.

  On 2/1/2016 at 7:34 AM, Audioblysk said:

 

  On 2/1/2016 at 7:31 AM, usagi said:

at the risk of sounding like an edgelord: nobody really knows what they're doing or where the fuck they're going, and certainly not why. sure your career is great and your marriage is nice and your possessions are cool but so what? what's it all for? in the end you're just going to be dust in the ground like everyone else and that's that. if there is no final judgement and no promised afterlife and all meaning is manufactured/relative, then really, what separates you from the hobo sleeping on the corner who bombed out of life early and has 'achieved' nothing? nothing, that's what.

 

but being plagued by thoughts like these is probably worse than plain old feelings of inadequacy which everyone gets, so let's just carry on with this collective illusion while it's going and forget I said anything.

 

(gets a bike)

 

  On 2/1/2016 at 7:25 AM, ambermonk said:

I dunno. It's easier to lament about what we don't have, than to be grateful for what we already do I think. But I'm just thinking out loud, whether or not any of this makes sense.

It makes sense. Thanks for your post.

i had similar thoughts in the past when i compared myself to others that seemed to have it together and my friend was like, "how do you know they are really happy though". so true. nobody has the perfect life, everyone has struggles.

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"

I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

 

For fuck's sake.

Are "cool fucking projects" of your own something you know you want? Are they really that cool, or rather something that certain other people are making you feel you should want or have in your life? If it's the latter I wouldn't worry about it too much, you could be the type that finds their satisfaction elsewhere.

Nothing humans do, has any meaning or is even worth it. As soon as a human beeing gets older, it notices its own mortality. That's why it starts to "do something with its life". Doing "cool fucking projects" does not change the fact that the human beeing will die and that everything it did will be dust soon. These "cool fucking projects" are nothing more than a way to deal with midlife crisis.

Okay, you could outcast yourself from society, switch to davinci level of authism and create something that has actual impact to the world. But that is not a "cool fucking project"... that is a way to ruin your life in exchange for a small allspark

my two best friends are polar opposites, and whenever i speak to them about something they always give me the opposite advice.

this is getting really fucking confusing and i'm in a funk right now about my job and career prospects etc.

they both work in the industry i want to work in, but both got in completely different ways.

do i retrain? do i blag it at the interview? am i pitching too high? too low?

i have absolutely no fucking idea anymore.

and my current job sucks.

(i have a bike btw)

you have a bicycle, which is a whole other problem.

Holy crap, my post seems to have struck a nerve here and there. I take that as a positive thing and consider this to be a thing that most people go through.

I was just about to write down what had caused the sudden shift in my mood, but when I saw it written in front of me I thought to myself, that I was an idiot for getting all frowny about that sort of stuff.

I guess all in all, I just feel that my everyday life has come to a halt and that my job (not my freelance stuff) and my personal life is to blame.

I've become more boring and more awkward among strangers. I used to be quite cheery. The only thing I can talk about now is sound, music, and how dumb my colleagues are. I guess all of this just overshadows all the cool things I actually get to do as a freelance sound designer. But if it wasn't for certain things and my fulltime job I would be much happier. I feel like I'm drowning in shit I don't want to do. Also, it has taken me some time but I've finally realised how tough and what a huge job it can be to have a girlfriend. It can be really exhausting. I miss the times where I could do whatever the hell I wanted. It sounds like selfish and I guess it kinda is...

  On 2/1/2016 at 12:34 AM, messiaen said:

 

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"
I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

For fuck's sake.

Also tomorrow is most likely gonna be reeeeeeally awkward as we've filled out a employee satisfaction survey and from what I know a couple of people including me have complained about my boss. I especially told him exactly how I feel about certain things. Luckily, the survey was anonymous but if he just stops and thinks for a second he'll know which one is mine.

aged 25 i did this all the fucking time, but now im just content and happy with what ive got. which is pretty much bugger all, im a kitchen porter. im currently working on a large enough repetoire to play smooth cocktail jazz piano in hotel lobbys, then im gonna buy a suit and go round every swanky hotel in glasgow that doesnt have a cocktail jazz pianist and see if they want one. other than that for a plan, my career trajectory is absolutely miserable. still happy though. got a nice chunk of studio gear however.

 

That actually sounds pretty fucking cool. I wish I was a piano player at a cocktail bar, haha

  On 2/1/2016 at 12:38 AM, Danny O Flannagin said:

 

  On 1/31/2016 at 11:35 PM, Squee said:

Do you sometimes stop up and think, "what the fuck am I doing with my life?"
I've had one of those evenings where I'm suddenly questioning everything. I was at a dinner party earlier tonight and there were all these people talking about all these cool fucking projects they're working on and my self esteem just got lower and lower throughout the evening. Now I'm questioning everything from my profession, my girlfriend, where I live, the things I didn't get to do and that I'm now in a part of my life where certain things are expected of me.

For fuck's sake.

Also tomorrow is most likely gonna be reeeeeeally awkward as we've filled out a employee satisfaction survey and from what I know a couple of people including me have complained about my boss. I especially told him exactly how I feel about certain things. Luckily, the survey was anonymous but if he just stops and thinks for a second he'll know which one is mine.

 

I find comparing yourself to other people is never healthy. What projects would you want to start that would make you satisfied?

 

I know.

Well, here's the thing I don't have time for anything anymore. I don't have time to make music for myself anymore - there's a reason why my next EP is going to be called "While at Work" ;)

  On 2/1/2016 at 5:58 AM, luke viia said:

well, pretty sure my 5+ year live-in relationship is about to fall apart.

That fucking sucks, man. Sorry to hear that...

  On 2/1/2016 at 12:28 PM, MDM Chaos said:

my two best friends are polar opposites, and whenever i speak to them about something they always give me the opposite advice.

 

this is getting really fucking confusing and i'm in a funk right now about my job and career prospects etc.

 

they both work in the industry i want to work in, but both got in completely different ways.

 

do i retrain? do i blag it at the interview? am i pitching too high? too low?

 

i have absolutely no fucking idea anymore.

 

and my current job sucks.

 

(i have a bike btw)

My 2 cents: it's been a long time since I've had a job interview but at this point if I have to be too phony in an interview, the place probably isn't worth working at.